


my pressure on your hips

by dragon_rider



Category: The Voice (US) RPF, The Voice RPF
Genre: 30 Days of Smut Challenge, 69 (Sex Position), Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst and Porn, Barebacking, Blow Jobs, Breaking Up & Making Up, Clothed Sex, Coming Untouched, Desk Sex, Dirty Talk, Doggy Style, Dom/sub, Dubious Consent, First Time, Floor Sex, Fluff and Smut, Kitchen Sex, Lap Sex, M/M, Masturbation, Morning Sex, Outdoor Sex, Phone Sex, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Porn with Feelings, Possessive Behavior, Public Sex, Rimming, Rough Sex, Sexual Content, Shower Sex, Size Kink, Somnophilia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-31
Updated: 2016-11-20
Packaged: 2018-04-12 04:27:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 30
Words: 64,667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4465424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dragon_rider/pseuds/dragon_rider
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>fills for this <a href="http://bluebellglowinginthedark.tumblr.com/post/31013467173/30-days-otp-challenge-nsfw-version">otp challenge</a>.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. cuddles (naked)

**Author's Note:**

> i won't update this daily but I'll do my best to finish it soon.
> 
> there shall be porn in every chapter or so help me god.
> 
> sorry if this sucks too much.

“Oh my God, turn that off,” Adam complained the second Usher’s voice started playing on the speakers connected to Blake’s phone, squirming to get away from Blake’s touch, “Turn it off, I mean it.”

“What’s wrong with that song? I thought you loved it,” he said, arms holding Adam tighter against his body and not letting him go.

“It’s fucking weird, asshole, that’s what’s wrong,” the younger man explained, turning to scowl disapprovingly at him, “We’re in bed and your dick is poking my ass, it’s kinda gross. Just turn it off already.”

Blake chuckled, pressing warm, damp kisses to the tattooed skin on Adam’s shoulders until he felt his smaller lover loosening up again and sighing, letting Blake spoon him and snuggle with him despite of their friend’s voice still in the air around them.

Adam pressed closer against him, entwining their legs tighter together and using the sole of his foot to caress Blake’s calf from time to time, his hands keeping Blake’s arms around his waist as if he thought the country singer could go away if he let go.

He was quite the cuddler, the little guy, not allowing Blake an inch of personal space whenever they were alone; a sweet needy shameless thing, and Blake just couldn’t get enough of him, of _this_ —of them with nothing but their own skin separating them.

He could swear on his life being like this with Adam would never lose the novelty, that strong feeling of rightness and adoration that assaulted him each and every single time he had the skilled musician and made him sing things that weren’t songs but that were music to Blake’s ears.

Time went by fast, it always did when they were like this, and it was just as blissful but more intoxicating once he slipped inside Adam’s entrance for a second time that night, manhandling his co-star until he was flat against the mattress—or rather, as flat as he could get, his pert perfect little ass up in the air for Blake to slide right in, Adam’s back arched beautifully to press wantonly against him so he’d get Blake’s dick deeper inside him.

Adam’s breath hitched as he took him back in, sighing almost in relief at feeling him inside again and keening when Blake pushed his legs farther apart with his thighs to get Adam nice and spread for him, his right arm around Adam’s neck to stop him from bouncing forward too much with the relentless pace he’d set for them.

“Want me to stop now?” he teased, smirking when Adam could only get a jumbled ‘huuuh’ out, and burrowing closer into the sweaty and sex-heated skin of his lover’s neck, “This too gross for you, rock star?”

Adam gripped his forearm tight as the only reply, murmuring something that sounded like ‘ _right there_ ’ while Blake pushed him down and used every ounce of strength he had to fuck Adam just right, just the way they both liked.

There was something incredibly arousing in pinning him like this, in knowing Adam would’ve nowhere to go and no way to stop him not even if he wanted to, and his practically insatiable partner seemed more sated the most skin to skin contact he got so it was a win-win situation.

He took Adam’s left hand in his and used the other one to grab his hip when he was close, his ear hot with all the panting and moaning coming out of Adam’s open mouth.

Adam stuttered a loud, high-pitched moan as he came and Blake ‘s hips lost rhythm, groaning against Adam’s neck as he chased an orgasm that didn’t disappoint one bit and left him trembling and tingly all over. Adam kept his face snug against Blake's cheek, his forehead just over Blake's temple as they caught their breath.

They went right back to cuddling once he’d cleaned them both enough not to stink and covered them with the blanket only for Adam to kick it with his feet in quick tiny and jerky movements, turning in his arms with a frown.

“You’re a furnace, we don't need those, ” the younger man said as explanation, making Blake smile fondly since he knew Adam would be cold in just a few more minutes once their sweat had dried.

He kissed Adam’s hairline and closed his eyes, losing track of time and probably falling asleep as well, squinting but welcoming Adam in his arms after his lover returned from the bathroom cold as a popsicle and burrowed into Blake’s chest like he was the only source of heat in the world.

Adam sighed happily, tangling his cold feet with his own.

Instead of annoying the hell out of him it made a fuzzy, warm feeling settle in his chest.

“I got you, darling,” he drawled in a whisper, half of him still needing to hear the words out loud to believe it, “I got you.”


	2. kiss (naked)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this got a little out of hand. 
> 
> i blame blake's song 'sangria' for this.

Adam had had many lovers, that much was true, and maybe he’d lost track or forgotten most of them but his body remembered the important bits; remembered how being with them and moving up and down to a rhythm so natural and instinctive it was almost animalistic felt like, remembered how the sensation of their lips crushing and tangled together traveled down his spine and made him giddy and eager with pleasure.

There had always been a thrill pushing him to open buttons faster, to touch warm and naked skin sooner, and when the rush was gone and his appetite was sated there’d always been a desire for more of anything he could get, whether that was more sex or just some snuggles.

Most of his lovers indulged him for a while—some of them for a long, long while, even tried to want Adam as much as he wanted and needed them and when they failed they  pretended to feel the same way for as long as they could.

Blake, he—shit, Adam didn’t even know how to put it into words. He was on a class of his own, his own personal Sasquatch of a boyfriend; there was no indulging or trying or pretending with him, those were things that didn’t exist in his vocabulary or—even more surprisingly—his heart.

There was no asking or pleading needed with him; he made Adam feel wanted and—better yet— _needed_ every time they were together, his hands or his lips always on him or about to be whenever they could afford to let their feelings for each other out, and he hated to admit it but he was actually—very much, alright—absolutely terrified of Blake turning cold and distant once he’d had his fill of him.

The tall, handsome country singer didn’t leave him much room to feel anxious though. He could literally sweep Adam off his feet and make his mind go blank with just the brushing of his lips on his and oh, those were the kisses Adam loved the most; the ones that started with Blake nuzzling against him, tucking his nose against Adam’s neck and then going up to brush his lips with his own, making Adam open his mouth and pant and long for more so bad it was almost a physical craving, something that hurt deep down but felt so good he didn’t care if it ended up hurting him in the end.

Blake swept away every single doubt in Adam’s heart with the force of a tidal wave, his big hands grabbing his thighs to throw him over the kitchen island the minute they were finally in Adam’s place and his nibble fingers made quick work of his skinny jeans and underwear at the same time he leaned down to breathe against Adam’s already parted lips and kissed him heatedly as his hand jerked him off quick and dirty, his wrist and the tip of his index finger working magic to make Adam spread his legs for him like a whore being offered the best commission ever.

Adam had to bite his lip not to moan with the telltale sound of Blake's zipper, straightening to help his partner get rid of their clothes as fast they could.

“My Gosh, Adam,” his lover panted, voice wrecked to a low rumble with lust, his hand already massaging the tight skin of his rim to coax him to let him in with warm, spit-wet fingertips, “You were looking at me almost the whole fucking time, just at me, I saw you, don’t think I didn’t.”

“Yeah, so?” and fuck, he wanted to be sassy, but he knew he wasn’t pulling it off; his whole body felt so hot that his cheeks were flushed bright red and the way he arched shamelessly the instant he had Blake’s finger in him didn’t exactly leave him with much dignity, not that he needed it at all, “Come on, fuck me already, I can take it, just fucking do it.”

“Hush,” Blake said, berating, which made no fucking sense considering Adam could feel his dick already hard and leaking against his ass, “I wanna take this slow, want to kiss every inch of you first, drink you all up.”

Adam laughed breathily at that; he wasn’t the only one that was aiming too high, there was just no such thing as going slow for them, especially not after a long day of work that left Blake so impatient to be with him he’d literally hauled Adam onto the first available surface to fuck on, not that he was complaining about it or was ever going to.

He glided his lips over Blake’s, following the deliciously desperate pace his lover had set for them, sucking his lips so they’d be glued together again every time they parted just enough to get some air in their lungs as his hips moved to help Blake stretch him faster with his fingers dripping with too much lube his cowboy had squirted out of a package in his haste to be in him already.

Blake’s tongue seemed to dance with his own, making all kinds of dirty promises as he all but fucked Adam’s mouth with it, and Adam’s hands gripped him tighter, wishing he had three more arms to cling to Blake’s shoulders, to dig his fingers into his back until it smarted, to tug the short hairs of his nape and to tousle his hair beyond recognition like only a thoroughly good lay could do all at the same time.

They enjoyed the sweet relief of finally being joined together with their foreheads pressed close, waiting for Adam to adjust to Blake’s length impaling him with messy, noisy kisses that made Adam shiver almost as much as Blake’s head hitting his prostate did.

“ _Blake_ ,” he panted, half protest and half praise, when the country singer chose to push himself up with his hands to focus all of his energy in snapping his hips into Adam’s willing, thirsty body, the front man’s right leg wrapped snugly around his back as his left foot fumbled for leverage to get Blake deeper and harder in him, “Blake, just, _fuck_ —“

It wasn’t quite working, or maybe Adam was too much of a greedy little shit, but it got better once his elbows stopped sliding on the smooth surface of the island and got him up to connect his mouth to Blake’s again, cutting his grunting short to taunt him into a kiss that devolved in ten more, that made his back arch and his toes curl so much he didn’t even know where all the pleasure was coming from anymore, just feeling it like a constant electric current in his spine, gathering in his groin in an overwhelming way that only made him ache for more, for faster, made him cry for it as Blake nibbled and brushed his lips between kisses, promising without words he’d give Adam exactly what he needed.

“Adam, Christ, you gotta,” Blake stuttered, voice a deep rumble, one of his hands pushing Blake’s head down to him so his mouth would never be out of reach. Even looking at him through half-lidded eyes, Adam could tell he was as close to coming as he was, “I’m gonna—“

It was just a few more seconds of their lips smacking together and their hips making even filthier noises for Adam to lose it; he stiffened and got lost in the white hot overpowering wave of his orgasm, body jerking as Blake gave him one of the dirtiest kisses they’d ever shared and finished inside him at the same time, Adam’s walls clenching around him instinctively making Blake groan into the kiss and ground against him almost frantically.

He gasped when the country star took himself in hand and pulled out.

Adam already wanted him again.

“God, Adam, you’re the sweetest, most perfect thing,” Blake marveled, “Look at you, wish I could have you all night.”

Adam blinked dazedly, still panting, because he’d closed his eyes for just one second and Blake was suddenly out of sight but he could feel him close.

“Ah!” he yelped, surprised but so very turned on he went right back to lay on top of the island and opened his legs as far as they could go for Blake to pepper his inner thighs with kisses, sucking patches of smooth skin into his mouth when he seemed to get closer to his goal, his lips brushing Adam’s crack until he kissed him right in the place he’d just vacated, “Oh, _oh_ , you’re going to—ah—“

“Hmm—mm,” Blake murmured, probably kneeling on the floor to start licking into his messy, used entrance easily.

Adam didn’t even resist, tossing his legs on his boyfriend’s shoulders and moaning an octave higher than before as Blake rimmed him like a pro, seemingly wanting to make room for more before pushing back in because Adam could hear the sound of his hand jacking his cock, fist sliding the foreskin over the head again and again as his tongue was busy fucking Adam.

He touched himself too and hissed through the oversensitivity, teasing his slit and gritting his teeth whenever Blake reached far inside of him but never quite gave him enough.

“Oh God, please, please,” he said between gasps, moaning loudly and trembling when Blake sucked a mark right where ass met thigh, “Put it back in me, put it _back_.”

He was such a slut, he knew that, but Blake seemed to love that about him; he practically roared, hastily getting to his feet and missing a couple of times in his rush to slam home again.

“Yeah,” he whispered, teary eyes flickering open when Blake manhandled him effortlessly so they were both sitting on the floor and Adam could push against him better and cling to Blake’s upper back as they kissed again, Blake's hands holding and guiding his hips almost hard enough to bruise, “ _Yeah_ , yeah, shit—”

Blake didn’t let him talk much more than that, lips commanding and zealous in their need to pretty much never part from Adam’s to the point he knew his mouth would sting for hours.

He looked forward to it; to the reminder of just how crazy they were for each other, how amazing this was no matter how many times they did it.

“Adam, I want—I—“ Blake stammered and Adam was nodding before he even heard what it was about, the beat of their hips all he cared about. He let his lover know that by tightening the grip of his legs around the taller man’s middle and clenching around him in every thrust, “I can’t—shouldn’t—“

Adam squeaked then, stunned at feeling Blake’s teeth biting right under his ear, and gaped through the pain of it.

That was going to be a bitch to conceal for sure but he kept goading Blake to fuck him until they were both finally coming again and tumbling in a heap of exhausted limbs on the cold tiles.

“You _bit_ me,” he accused, rubbing the abused spot to make sure he wasn’t bleeding even though it felt like he was, “Dickhead.”

Blake looked sheepish for about three seconds, distracting him with small sleepy kisses next and being all southern gentleman by carrying Adam to bed even though his legs were more than a little bit unsteady as well.

Adam hid a pleased smile against Blake’s shoulder and secured Blake in place with a leg between his long ones as they cuddled under the covers, sighing when the country singer wrapped an arm around his waist and pressed a soft kiss to his hair.

"Night, baby," he murmured, tilting his chin up and closing his eyes expectantly.

Blake didn't disappoint, cupping his cheek and kissing him almost reverently after whispering a _g'night, darling_ that felt more like an _I love you_.


	3. first time

Adam sighed through his nose, eyes fluttering behind his lids as Blake settled in the space between his legs and pressed him flat on the couch after what felt like a small eternity of making bedrooms eyes at him while he stubbornly tried to watch the movie they’d picked for the night and Adam couldn’t for the life of him look away from the country singer’s long legs casually crossed right beside him.

It wasn’t even their third official date but fuck it, if putting out so soon made him a whore he could deal with it. He was going to have Blake that night, one way or the other, and if his dumb hick of a boyfriend didn’t feel like fucking he’d gladly suck him off and find his own pleasure by driving him crazy with his mouth around him.

Thankfully it looked like he was on exactly the same page Adam was; he kissed the lead man like he never wanted to let him breathe ever again and then took his lips playfully between his own as he unzipped Adam and his long fingers closed around his length brazenly, squeezing him just right and pumping him under his boxers.

Adam didn’t need any other kind of prompting; he rutted against Blake’s hand eagerly, moaning in open approval and tossing his head back in bliss. Handjobs hardly ever felt this good but there was something almost magical about feeling Blake’s hand on him after so many fantasies and years of longing and he fumbled to grope Blake’s ass to let him know he wanted more and fast and pretty much about anything he had to give.

“I gotta warn you, rock star,” Blake whispered against his neck, wet lips taking advantage of the span of skin available there to touch, “You’re gonna walk funny tomorrow if we keep going.”

Adam whimpered at the mere thought of having Blake inside him, opening his legs more and humping Blake’s hand harder and messier as words rushed through his mind to tell Blake he didn’t give a fuck about tomorrow; he just cared about their bodies entangled together in that moment and how much closer they could get.

“Please,” he cried out, straightening and opening his eyes to look at Blake’s baby blues, “I want you so bad.”

Blake’s pointer finger stroked the head of his cock in response, a grunt leaving each of their throats before they scrambled to undress and rolled on the floor to the thick carpet in Blake’s living room since the couch was way too small for them to have sex on comfortably and there was no way they were letting go of each other to make it to a bedroom.

The country singer gave him a bit of stink eye when Adam produced a couple of lube packages from his pocket and he didn’t even bother not to roll his eyes.

“You’re such a dumb person,” he said, shaking his head, pushing a bit off of Blake’s chest to frown at him better, “I have these for you, I was ready for us to fuck right after you asked me out.”

His lover’s hands gripped the small of his back tighter, his mouth determined to make up for the scant seconds he’d lost judging Adam, thinking he let just about anyone fuck him.

Blake kissed just like he sang, Adam thought, so candidly it hurt a little bit.

“I don’t—“ Blake choked, his voice so deep it got lost in his chest for a moment, “I don’t think I can go slow, Adam.“

He looked so worried, the stupid idiot, like it was an actual bad thing what he was saying.

“Good,” he soothed, pressing a happy kiss to Blake’s lips and deepening it until the air burned in his lungs, “I hate slow,” he stated, forehead snug against Blake’s, “Give me dirty any day.”

“Goddamn it, Adam,” Blake cursed, manhandling Adam so fast to his hands and knees that he squeaked, “I’ll show you what dirty means.”

He writhed around two of his lover’s fingers then—he wasn’t kidding about going fast, Adam noted, and that suited him just fine. They’d been dancing around each other for years, they’d waited long enough for this, and he would’ve been happy with just humping on the couch so he was fucking _ecstatic_ about getting Blake’s dick instead.

The tip of Blake’s fingers brushed against his sweet spot on accident first, making Adam’s whole body jerk before he pressed back to get them deeper as he cried out, and then slammed against it like he was planning on fucking murdering Adam with pleasure.

He choked as Blake just kept rub-rub-rubbing him there, leg twitching and belly contracting as he took Blake’s fingers as far as they could go and clamped on them greedily, smirking a little when the country star swore again and forwent rolling on the condom Adam had handed him as well in favor of hastily pulling his fingers out and start poking Adam’s crack with the head of his dick as he missed the mark quite a few times and only got it right when he wrapped an arm around Adam’s waist and _pushed_.

Adam’s hands trembled with the effort of keeping himself upright, knees weak as pain flared all the way up his back from where Blake was already fucking him shallowly like he was utterly unable of doing anything else, barely waiting enough to let him open up until every inch of him was inside.

He hissed and gasped and just took it, couldn’t help but sob through it since Blake was too fucking big for this kind of rushed encounter and it’d been ages since he’d let anyone fuck him.

“So fucking tight,” Blake gritted out, delighted, his free hand snaking to Adam’s front after a long, loud cry made it out of his mouth, “Got you, Adam, easy now.”

Adam arched against Blake’s chest, shivering almost violently as Blake jacked him off roughly while slipping into him over and over like that was his birthright and fuck if that wasn’t one of the hottest things Adam had ever felt.

It turned good again soon enough, just as they were both skidding on the floor and getting some serious rug burn and Blake’s hips finally found the angle that turned Adam into a horny mess, that pretty much made him a stray cat in heat begging to be fucked.

“Yes, yes, _yes_! Blake, fuck, so good,“ he keened, seeing white flashes behind his closed eyes and turning his head to blindly bump noses with his lover and kiss him messily as they picked up the pace.

Their hips met relentlessly, Adam pushing back right as Blake slammed into him, the noise of their skin slapping almost as loud as their grunts and moans.

He knew the burn in his backside would come back with a vengeance once they finished but he didn’t give a damn; Blake could’ve shoved him into one of their trailers and took him right beneath the window and he would’ve let him, just like that.

He’d never had anyone fucking finish inside him and he stuttered a surprised yelp as Blake ground against him, his warm seed filling Adam up as his hand went wild around his length and made him come in thick long spurts in about five seconds.

Blake kissed his shoulder blade lovingly as Adam panted and sagged beneath him, letting Blake hold pretty much all of his weight for the couple of minutes it took them to get enough breath back to break apart.

He didn’t let Blake get very far, pushing him down the second Blake tried to stand up and climbing to his lap to kiss him deeply before crawling to lick his sack sloppily but thoroughly, making him squirm and moan and push Adam’s head closer with a firm hand despite of the oversensitivity of his recent orgasm.

“I knew you’d have a nice dick,” Adam breathed happily, letting Blake tug him up to slump against his chest, “I fucking love it.”

Blake held him tighter, hands kneading Adam’s butt as their lips glided over one another, and nuzzled his nose as their sweaty and hot skin was flushed together.

“How did I get so lucky?” his handsome lover asked, voice hoarse, “Christ, Adam, you’re amazing.”

He pointedly overlooked the anxious flip-flop his heart made at hearing that, just like he ignored the _but for how long will you think that_ loud and clear that soared in his mind.

He’d never been able to make people stay, just give them a really good time for as long as they wanted to stick around, and he wasn’t sure he’d be able to cope with Blake leaving. Just thinking about it made his breath hitch and his eyes well up with tears again for a reason that was decisively un-sexy and that there was no way in fucking hell he’d be saying out loud ever.

He kept his gaze down and his body loose in Blake’s arms but the taller man seemed to know what he was thinking anyway and soothed him with a lingering kiss on his temple.

“I’ll treat you right, darling,” he drawled, guiding Adam to tuck his head under his chin, “I promise.”

Adam sighed and burrowed into him, couldn’t help but believing him and gave both his heart and his body on a silver platter for Blake to do as he pleased.


	4. masturbation

Blake wasn’t sure which one was worse; the fact that he was jerking off while Adam was right outside, still awake and playing Wii in just underwear and a threadbare tee, or the fact that he was desperately imagining it was Adam’s heat instead of the spit-soaked skin of his palm that he was fucking into.

He’d left the faucet open to mask the noises he couldn’t swallow, but truth be told the possibility of Adam hearing what he was doing in the bathroom only made it better, made the tingling liquid hotness in his groin burst and warm every bit of his body from the tip of his toes to the top of his head.

He widened his stance, spreading his free hand on the wall in front of him as his hips chased his release in quick eager thrusts, biting his lip to muffle his pleasure and closing his eyes to imagine Adam wrapped around him; letting Blake make love to him in a way he’d never done before but that he was definitely willing— _aching_ —to try.

Pre-come gathered on the tip as he thought about the pretty sounds Adam would make for him. He could bet the pop singer was a shameless and loud bed partner, that his voice would turn high-pitched and breathy once he had Blake’s dick moving just right and hitting all the right places inside him.

He batted his hand to get soap to ease the way of his fist, working himself a lot better if louder than he probably should’ve but not caring about anything that wasn’t the mental image he had of Adam split open on his cock and begging for more as Blake took him and showed him exactly how much chemistry they had together once and for all, bromance be damned.

He could practically feel Adam’s entrance fluttering around him if he squeezed his dick at the right times and he forced himself not to move his hand and rock his hips instead so pretending he was having sex with his close, beautiful friend would be easier.

Back in the bedroom, Adam laughed. Blake hissed and smeared more pre-come all over himself, speed picking up with the extra lubrication and the frantic need pulsing through him to come as soon as he could.

He twisted his wrist, flicking his slit the way he liked it, but nothing came even close to how the real thing would feel like, and getting himself off had never been so frustrating but so good at the same time.

He spilled into the toilet, tucked himself back in his jeans and looked into the mirror, his eyes dark with something that was more lust than guilt. Guilt had been something he’d felt the first couple of times he’d gripped his dick tight after getting a little overexcited looking at pictures of Adam, something he’d squeezed out of himself by sheer necessity and couldn’t afford to have with all the teasing Adam subjected him to every time they were together.

He washed his hands and went back to sit on the bed with his friend, welcoming the smaller man in his arms when Adam climbed back to his lap as if that was his rightful place. The lead man pushed the remote into his hand chirpily, a confident glint in his eyes that told Blake he was about 99,9% sure he was going to win.

Blake usually loved proving him wrong but this time he just felt like enjoying their closeness.

He’d let Adam have his fun, he was stupidly cute when he bragged anyway.

“Come on, grandpa,” he smirked, wriggling his backside against Blake in his excitement just like he’d been doing for the past couple of hours, “Time to get your ass whooped.”

Blake weaved his arms around Adam’s waist, gripping the remote and conveniently trapping Adam in his lap to press big, sloppy kisses to his cheek and the side of his neck.

“Oh my God, you’re so gross,” Adam complained, squirming to get Blake’s lips off of him but not actually doing any effort to pull away, “You’re making it creepy, man, stop.”

He raised his eyebrows expectantly and Adam blinked big, confused eyes for a second before laughing and indulging him, kissing his cheek before turning back to the screen.

“Give me a challenge, cowboy,” his friend prompted, “I trust you.”

Blake had a challenge of his own, a challenge he beat every time he didn’t kiss Adam breathless and made him his, but he delivered.

He already knew he’d end up in the bathroom again that night, trying and failing to rub the tantalizing feel of Adam’s lithe and sinewy body off of him.


	5. blow job

Blake gripped Adam’s knees and spread his legs nicely, lips quirking up in satisfaction when his partner’s chest heaved and he just laid there completely at the country singer’s mercy.

He grabbed the meaty side of Adam’s thighs, fingers digging into soft and barely hairy flesh, and dived to lap and tease his bony hipbones with his teeth. Adam trembled and gasped, his cock twitching against his belly as if begging for Blake’s attention, but stayed put just like Blake wanted.

He slipped his middle finger between Adam’s cheeks, tracing hot skin until the tip touched that private place that he’d become so addicted to and rousing a needy whine from his lover that ignited even more heat in his veins and almost, almost made him cave and simply fuck the smaller man onto the mattress.

He pushed Adam down instead, hands unyielding on his spread legs as he took the head of the pretty cock in front of him and sucked it like a popsicle on a hot summer day; like he was starved for it and wanted it to melt in his mouth this instant.

Adam’s hips bucked as a loud, shrill cry left his throat and Blake used his tongue and cheeks carefully to bring him in deeper, applying pressure whenever he felt like he was one second too close to coughing. He blinked through the effort, looking up to lock his eyes with Adam as the pop singer gawked and stared at him in awe.

“Blake, _oh_ —oh God, please,” Adam babbled, eyes brimming with pleasure-induced tears, “Don’t stop.”

It made him feel more than a little guilty, the fact they’ve been sleeping together for too damn long for this to be the first time Blake went down on him, but he vowed to make up for it right then and there, using every single trick he knew so that Adam would never ever forget this moment.

He closed a lubed palm around the base of Adam’s cock, gently rolling his sack with his other hand as he got used to the weight of his lover on his tongue and tried hollowing his cheeks harder this time.

“Holy fucking shit, Blake, fuck,” Adam panted, opening his legs impossibly more as his hand around his nape pressed Blake closer to his groin.

He slurped, taking just a little bit more of his lover into his throat, and felt sharp electric pleasure when Adam moaned loudly in response and fell back on the pillow, eyes closing and back arching as Blake worked him.

He bobbed his head up and down Adam’s shaft; his beautiful partner was just the right width to fit nicely in his mouth and he got used to having him like this easily, kneading Adam’s thighs roughly to give himself a bit of momentum to give him head with and not allowing Adam for a second to move his hips to help more than with tiny involuntary thrusts up to him.

By then, Adam was moaning loudly enough to be heard across the house and a little more than that too; it was good that they had no nosy neighbors to worry about.

It wasn’t his plan to torture Adam, it really wasn’t, but he couldn’t help stopping for a moment to lick the sides of his cock as they shared a heated, meaningful glance and Adam practically sobbed at the loss of the heat around him, pushing up on his elbows to look at him.

“You’re gonna come in my mouth, darling,” he drawled hoarsely, smirking as the tip of his tongue flicked Adam’s slit and his lover’s eyes rolled back in his head, his middle finger rubbing Adam’s rim again and almost pressing in, “And then you’ll be mine to do whatever the hell I want with you.”

“Anything,” Adam nodded, eyelids fluttering as Blake deep-throated him again, “Anything you want oh God please, please, baby, just keep going.”

He took special care in brushing the thick vein in the underside as he glided his lips tightly around Adam, throat vibrating in a pleased chuckle as his lover thrashed and gave a sharp, obscene wail.

It didn’t take much more to get Adam spurting in the back of his throat and he made sure his finger went right in at the same time he shook and rocked up wildly in the mist of his orgasm.

He learned Adam was refreshingly loose then, barely needing Blake’s fingers to prep him before he could take his place between his legs and slide right in; the small hitching noises his lover kept making spurring him on to seek his own release, for once not worrying about the angle or anything that wasn’t rocking his hips at the pace that suited him best, grunting and speeding up in approval when Adam tossed his legs on his elbows to let Blake fuck him.

Adam held on to his shoulders with an arm, gurgling a little whenever Blake’s body weighed on him more and got in deeper, and it was a real pity he couldn’t last longer to keep looking down at him, all dazed and meek, and hearing him react to Blake using him like a fuck toy.

He finished with a long groan, filling Adam with so much of his seed it wasn’t a wonder it started leaking the second he pulled out, a creamy streak of it that Blake couldn’t resist rubbing on the smooth flesh of Adam’s ass.

Adam winced when he rearranged them on the mattress after cleaning them up and Blake kissed his temple appreciatively, nuzzling against him until he felt the tension lines on that pretty face he loved easing.

“You took it like a champ,” he praised, still a little breathless.

Adam chuckled, “You eat dick like a champ too, cowboy,” he pointed out, croaky, “Where the fuck did you learn that?”

“Oh, y’know, around,” Blake replied vaguely, just because he liked watching Adam’s frowny adorable face but quickly coming clean, “You inspire me a lot, that’s all, honey.”

“Hmm,” Adam sighed, kissing him softly as his eyes slipped shut and he snuggled against Blake’s neck, an arm going around the taller man’s arms as if to keep him there, “You always have the right answers.”

Blake smiled, pulling the lean body just a little bit tighter against him, enjoying how Adam fit perfectly in his arms, “Just for you.”


	6. clothed getting off

He doesn’t regret it, grabbing Blake and pulling him into his trailer for a quickie between takes, but he has to admit he wasn’t expecting this.

They’re both so fucking desperate for it that neither of them can pull away long enough to get the clothes out of the way and it’s been years since Adam has come in his pants but that’s exactly where this is going and he can’t even find it in him to complain about it.

Blake nips at his bottom lip, his long fingers wrapped tightly on Adam’s nape, and he grips the front man's clothed ass firmly to press him against his groin, moaning when Adam cants his hips and gets him to brush the cleft between his cheeks that is fortunately very apparent in the skinny jeans he’s wearing.

“Be quiet,” Adam tries to say, but what comes out is a punched-out _nnnghh_ when he gets some much-needed friction on his dick, rubbing filthily and eagerly against Blake’s lower belly.

It’s not the first time being in Blake’s lap has turned into a session of hurried but amazing sex—it’s not even the first time they’ve done it in the studio, but there’s something enticingly new in the urgency they’re sharing this time, and even with the layers between them Adam feels closer to Blake than ever, reassured that his lover is anything but tired of him.

He can’t even remember if they’ve locked the door and he cocks his head as much as he can in Blake’s grip, squinting uselessly at it to try and remember but only getting his eyes flickering like a candle in a windy night when Blake picks that moment to grind against him quicker and harder, grunting as if stopping would literally kill him.

Adam’s cheeks flush, heat tingling close to his skin all over his body, and he has to stop kissing Blake to just pant through it, gripping the country star’s shoulders to move his own hips better and get them off sooner.

There’s a stripe of saliva connecting them but Adam hardly feels it, body shivering intensely as the head of his cock is trapped just right between them and Blake’s hard-on pushes against the sensitive spot behind his balls exactly like he needs him to.

He hears the steps like they’re from another dimension at first but feels Blake tensing as he hears them too, the knob on the door turning at the same time they scramble to roll off the couch and hide behind it, hips still working in a frenzy to get off and Adam's whole spine arching like a bow with the new, perfect pressure against him.

Blake covers his mouth with a hand firmly to shut him up and Adam does the same to him to muffle his grunts and he should feel ashamed maybe, of the way they don’t even stop as Carson calls out for them quite a few times before closing the door again, but all he cares about is the promising rising tickle in his belly that tells him he’s just about to get what he wants.

He feels Blake finishing at practically the same time he jerks and gasps through it, wincing at the wetness in his pants but not regretting what they did for a second, especially not when Blake sighs and lures him into a slow, intimate kiss that feels almost as good as sex with him does.

“My place tonight?” Adam asks when they part, quite comfortable with Blake pressing him against the floor.

“You betcha,” Blake agrees right away, looking down at him with a sated grin.

Adam smiles back, thinking they make quite the good team.


	7. dressed/naked (half dressed)

He comes back from the Golden Globes wearing a tux and a bowtie feeling every bit like a fish out of water and he’s ready to take everything off as quickly as he can when he feels strong arms around him and warm lips on his neck.

He gasps, tossing his head back on Blake’s shoulders as the taller man runs his hand over the span of his belly, right over the pristine white dress shirt he’s dressed in, and goes both meekly and willingly when his cowboy turns him around so they can look at each other.

He doesn’t know who does what first; if he tips his chin up and Blake grips it between his fingers to kiss him, deep and slow and evocative, or if Blake guides him to meet his lips and their mouths join starting with just a brush that already sends shivers down his spine.

Blake’s big hand feels like a brand on the small of his back, the heat radiating from his skin obvious and wonderful even through the layers of clothing, and he clings to his broad upper back helplessly as he does his best to let him know without a single word that he’s missed him more than anything.

“You did great,” Blake commends, voice low in the kind of whisper only lovers can share, “You’re so amazing, honey, can’t believe you’re all mine.”

Adam laughs a little through his nose, looking at the country singer through half-lidded eyes as he nuzzles Adam’s face with a kind of adoration that still makes the younger man blush and butterflies to go crazy in the pit of his stomach.

He’s staring at his lips mostly, not even trying to deny it, and looks up almost pleadingly into Blake’s blue-blue eyes when his lover fails to resume their kiss and only seems interested in holding him in his arms.

Adam welcomes him back with parted lips, sucking just enough to get Blake’s mouth nice and eager against his, and starts unbuttoning Blake’s plaid shirt just by feeling them with his fingertips.

“You’re so cheesy,” he mocks in that fond tone he uses to call Blake gross all the time.

Blake chuckles, cutting him off by picking him up by the thighs and forcing Adam to wrap his legs and arms around him not to fall over. He’s kissing him again before he can utter any more than a surprised cry and he forgets about everything else as he’s pressed against Blake’s warm, naked chest that he’s exposed just in time to feel him against him.

It still amazes him, how strong Blake is, and he enjoys the ride to his bedroom trying not to shiver with anticipation and failing quite a bit.

His lover takes his time taking off his attire for the night, brow furrowing in concentration as he pulls the bowtie loose and opens Adam’s buttons one by one as they stumble to the bed and kick their shoes off clumsily with most of their attention focused on each other.

Blake is deliberate and straightforward in getting him naked; Adam doesn’t know how he does it, but he feels drunk in the sensuality of the moment when Blake pulls his suit jacket off his shoulders and traps his elbows in it for a long moment as they share a kiss that’s almost all tongue and heat.

The jacket and the shirt are haphazardly tossed to the side of the bed as they fall on it, Adam’s fingers digging into the rippling muscles of Blake’s shoulder blades and noses brushing as they search for a new angle to suck the breath out of each other’s lungs.

Blake lets out a low animalistic growl when Adam pushes his hips off the bed to help him get his trousers off and all the patient slow demeanor gets whipped off of him the second Adam is sprawled bare under him.

“ _Blake_ ,“ Adam pants, jaw slack and eyes rolling back in his head when Blake starts pumping his dick with a firm hand, his pointer finger already mercilessly teasing the head, and presses a barely wet finger inside him up to the second knuckle in practically one go, “I’m not—I’m not going anywhere, fuck, we got all night.”

“I gotta have you, Adam,” Blake breathes against his neck as Adam arches, body trembling but spreading for his lover all the same, “Right now.”

He takes Blake out of his jeans with practiced, nimble fingers and only bothers lowering them around Blake’s thighs, using three of his own fingers to stretch himself further as Blake hastily slicks himself up before going back to nestle in the space between his legs.

Blake grips the wrist of the hand he has inside himself and pulls his fingers out, a glint of approval in his eyes that Adam can also see in the twitching of his dick standing hard and red and glistening in the best kind of dirty promise Adam knows.

It’s still a tight fit, letting Blake in despite he’s scarcely prepped enough, but he’s always appreciated the burn and the lingering feeling of them connected that stays with him when they’re done so he holds on for the ride and throws his legs on Blake’s clothed shoulders and his hands tight around the taller man’s arms, pushing back against the steady rhythm of his lover’s eager hips.

Blake’s hands brush his legs before settling on his thighs, fingers almost bruising Adam’s flesh, and just like that they’re in sync, moving together as they seek their release.

It does something to Blake, whenever Adam shows him just how lithe he is and how very ready he always is to take his cock, and soon there’s nothing in the air but the sounds of their pleasure and their skin connecting over and over, pace picking up messily whenever Adam moans loud and thrilled enough.

The country singer leaves a new love bite just beside the one Adam already had in the crook of his neck and grips him confidently, twisting his wrist at the precise moment Adam feels him hitting that spot inside him that drives him absolutely crazy, making him spill between them with a choked moan as a strong orgasm shakes him.

Blake is not far behind, spurting into him with quick short thrusts. Adam feels the warmth of his seed in him, and kisses him lingeringly on his cheek as they both pant and refuse to let go of one another just yet, one of his hands carding through Adam’s short hair.

Adam blinks up at him, smiling coyly and trying to duck his head but not quite managing since Blake seems determined to nuzzle every inch of his face.

Neither of them has said the three big words. There’s really no need to.


	8. skype sex

Adam slammed the door of the hotel room behind his back, sliding down until he was nothing but a frustrated lump on the floor.

He missed Blake in more ways than one. Exactly three weeks ago, he’d left the stupid country hick of his boyfriend after giving up on trying to convince him to catch up with the lead man after being done with his own summer tour.

“We could go to Paris or Rome or anywhere you want,” he’d offered, hopeful and secretly scared after getting so many no’s out of the man he loved more than anything, “Squeeze a couple of days somewhere just for us.”

He was just trying to get them to spend more time together, was that really so bad?

His heart ached when Blake made a face, his brow furrowing in that way that told Adam he didn’t find the idea appealing one bit.

“I’ll see you when you get back,” Blake had stated, shrugging like over a month of not seeing each other at all was no big deal and then adding, belligerent like Adam had never heard him, “If you still want to see me, that is.”

Adam had blinked after staring at him in sheer disbelief even though he got exactly what Blake was implying.

“What?” he’d asked uselessly, masochistically, just to twist the knife a little bit deeper into his gut.

“You heard me,” Blake had answered, brisk, but Adam could glimpse the obvious hurt he was feeling too at just the thought of his younger partner straying from him over being in another continent for too long and probably having a too avid sex drive to be healthy, “I don’t share, Adam, so if you sleep around, we’re done. For good.”

Adam had bristled then, righteously insulted. He was quite capable of keeping it in his pants when he was in love and he was.

He fucking was, not that Blake could see it yet, the stupid idiot.

“So you’re giving me the boot now so it won’t hurt so much if I do? Nice, Shelton,” he’d said, “Very nice. This is exactly the kind of goodbye I was looking forward to, thanks a bunch.”

“What do you want me to do, Adam, pretend I think you’re gonna wait for me when you’re horny?” Blake had inquired, just as miffed, “Fly all the way there so I can _make_ you be true to me?”

“Fuck you,” Adam had bit out, swallowing the broken _I love you, you fucking asshole_ that was on the tip of his tongue because Blake didn’t deserve to hear it, not after the meager couple of months they’d been together and especially not after _this_ , “You don’t wanna go, suit yourself. I’ll see you when I see you.”

He hadn’t even stayed for a kiss, spent the whole flight to their first venue sobbing miserably under his hoodie and brushing off every attempt of his friends to get him to talk about it or cheer him up.

It was easy to forget the misery and the hurt settled deep in his chest when they were performing but the rest of the time Adam was so stupidly unhappy and downright wrecked he didn’t know what to do anymore.

It only got worse with every innuendo and proposition he got from other people; guys, girls, sometimes both at the same time. The reckless, destructive side of him wanted to say yes not only because of all the fun he was going to have but just to prove Blake right and show him he’d been fucking a hopeless slut and could do so much better without Adam.

He didn’t know if he was angry or sad or both anymore. He just felt like shit.

“Adam,” he heard PJ’s voice and jumped out of his gloom unexpectedly, “Adam, man, you okay?”

He’d lost track of time. His hands were cold, his muscles stiff, his face more than a little bit damp. He hit the back of his head against the door, a weak flare of anger awakening in him at realizing what a mess he was.

Fuck, he’d been crying again, probably too loudly too. He’d been giving the guys the worst time ever with his fits. He really tried to be quiet about it, especially at night, but sometimes he just couldn’t hide it.

“Just leave,” he pleaded, his voice hoarse after their concert and however damn long he’d been crying over Blake fucking Shelton, “I’m fine, I just,” he sobbed, had to be bite his cheek to keep quiet, “I need to be alone.”

“You’re so full of shit, Adam,” Jesse disapproved through the door, “We got that douchebag boyfriend of yours on Skype, he says he wants to talk to you.”

That froze even the breath he was taking but got his head up.

Blake hadn’t called him, not even texted him, but he really didn’t blame him.

Adam hadn’t reached out to him either, after all. He was sure they were still together but he wasn’t sure they’d still be that way if they had another fight and as long as Adam was abroad, the chances of them arguing were high.

“Open up, buddy, come on,” James prompted gently and Adam wiped his face with one of the sleeves covering his hands and got to his feet shakily, unlocking the door to peer at his nosy but great friends through his fingers.

“All yours,” Matt said as Mickey handed Adam his iPad with Blake’s face in it.

Adam took it gingerly, toeing the door closed behind him and walking to the bed where he put the tablet and knelt beside it.

Blake looked sheepish and exactly as handsome as Adam remembered; his stubble thicker than he was used to but still allowing Adam to see his cheeks and the ghost of those dimples that he loved so much.

“Hey,” the country singer greeted, “It’s good to see you, sweetheart, real good.”

His drawl washed over Adam like the sun after a big storm, leaving warmth and light in its wake and letting Adam know that yeah, he was still head over hills for that jackass no matter how much he’d hurt him.

“Hi,” he said, sniffing and ducking his head only to lean on his arms in front of the small screen, jostling it a little on the mattress, “I haven’t cheated on you, in case you’re wondering.”

His words had no bite but Blake still winced, his big blue eyes tormented as he watched Adam thousands of miles away.

“I shouldn’t, ah,” Blake drawled, stammering, “I should’ve handled this better, Adam.”

“Yeah, no shit,” he snorted, knowing Blake had the hardest time apologizing but still pissed that he’d thrown such a huge tantrum over Adam being away.

“I’ll make it up to you,” the country star vowed and Adam smiled warmly at him even before he realized Blake was actually on a plane and gaped, making Blake smile, “As soon as I get there.”

“You’re coming!” Adam exclaimed, excited and then confused, “But I thought—“

“You don’t have to prove a goddamn thing to me or anybody, Adam,” Blake cut him off, “I was an idiot and an ass to you. If you went and slept with somebody else, it would’ve served me right.”

He didn’t want to think about what kind of things his friends had said to Blake to make him change his mind, what kind of things they’d confided that Adam wanted desperately to keep to himself because he just wasn’t ready to deal with them.

There was no ring on either of their fingers but he could still feel the weight of his own, could feel the ghost of its presence around his finger like he’d taken it off yesterday, and he knew it was the same for Blake.

It was just too soon for a lot of stuff. Suggesting a getaway together had been a mistake that had rubbed Blake the wrong way.

He wondered absently if that had tipped his lover off about just how committed Adam was to him or if it’d been how he reacted to their fight or maybe whatever it was Blake was seeing in his eyes right then over the video call, something that seemed to make it impossible for him to look away.

“I wanted to surprise you,” Blake admitted at length, eyes the warmest Adam had ever seen them when focused on him, “I shouldn’t have waited so damn long, Adam, I—“

“Don’t,” Adam cut him off, taking a long, shuddering breath. He knew better than to expect an actual apology and he was tired of hearing _I shouldn’t’_ s, he’d rather just let it go, “You had your reasons. At least you trust me now, right? We’re good.”

The country singer smiled softly, his face disappearing of the screen for a moment as he seemed to walk somewhere.

“I got an idea you’re gonna like,” Blake announced proudly at the same time Adam heard the distinctive click of a door being locked, “I’m gonna show you how much I’ve missed you, darling.”

The phone in his boyfriend’s hand shook a little bit as he heard the whoosh of a zipper being lowered and saw Blake licking his palm and fingers teasingly, his gaze suddenly heated and dark as Adam got on with the program and gasped.

Fucking hell, Blake wanted to have Skype sex with him, of all things.

“Babe, oh God,” Adam panted, drinking in the sight of the thick, flushed cock on the screen that Blake wasted no time in stroking confidently and quickly as if he was getting off on some good, dirty porn online. He felt arousal rising in his groin almost like a stab, stealing his breath and his reasoning away just in the way he loved and craved, “You’re so hard already, so big.”

“Easy when I’m picturing you around me, sweetheart,” Blake’s voice said, deep and low and so candid and sexy Adam felt himself blush more over it than from the obscene scene he was watching, “Hot and tight and opening up just for me.”

Blake grunted as he pushed the foreskin off of him, his fist tight around his length, and Adam stripped hurriedly, not wanting to miss a thing, rearranging the tablet on the nightstand as he climbed naked on the mattress and made sure most of his body was visible for his lover to watch.

“Look at me, baby,” Adam asked, waiting until Blake raised the phone to his eyes’ level and gaped to turn around and push his ass up, giving him a grade A view of the place where he should be losing himself into.

“Christ, Adam, fuck, you’re so hot,” Blake groaned, jaw clenching as Adam heard his hand speeding up, “Spread your cheeks for me, let me see you.”

He did as he was told, craning his neck not to miss the hungry, high expression on Blake’s face as his eyes zeroed on the pink, creased skin of his hole.

“Put—put your fingers in you, honey, push them in deep for me,” the older man instructed, voice raspy and jaw slack, “Look what you’re doing to me.”

Adam got a full frontal view of his boyfriend’s big dick leaking and jerking, as if eager to reach for him through the screen, and he moaned as he rummaged for the lube he kept under his pillow and coated his fingers with a generous amount to start rubbing his entrance with his fingertips, circling his rim with his index finger before pressing in to the first knuckle, moving it around quickly to push it all in.

“Blake,” he panted. He was so tight he wasn’t sure this was going to work at all but his lover’s lusty look encouraged him to keep trying and cut his own breath as he thrust his middle finger in hardly waiting at all to stretch for it, “I need you so bad, fuck, you gotta fuck me when you get here, promise me.”

“Gonna fuck you until you feel me in your throat, darling, I swear to you,” Blake drawled fiercely and Adam cried out, pushing back against his fingers when the tip of one brushed his prostate, his hips rocking frantically to get the first orgasm that wasn’t going to make him feel emptier after it in almost a month, “Jesus, Adam, look at you going for it, you miss my dick that much?”

Adam nodded fitfully, biting his cheek not to ruin the moment with something cheesy like _miss you_ , eyes fluttering close as heat traveled up and down his spine, warming him up and getting him drunk on it.

“Open your eyes, hun, look what you’re gonna get when I get there,” Blake said, and Adam did, watching with his mouth open and drool pooling in it as the country star’s hand moved up and down the hard shaft so fast Adam wondered if it hurt, “Touch yourself now, wanna watch you get off with me.”

His breath hitched as he complied, losing his balance when he took the hand he was leaning on off the bed to close it around his aching length and ended up with his face buried in the sheets as his hands went to town on exactly the parts of his body that cried for attention, his ass up in the air for Blake to see exactly what he was doing.

He hesitated in using a third finger to fuck himself with, knowing he needed more but also aware it wasn’t going to be and doubting he was physically capable of stopping and messing the rhythm he got going to add it to the mix. Two would have to do unless Blake said otherwise.

His shoulders rolled as he arched, knees tangling in the sheets as he opened up more to rub his fingers deeper inside, one of his legs twitching as his thumb flicked his slit and his hips went crazy between both of his hands. He moaned louder at hearing Blake groaning and the lewd sound of his lover’s hand getting him off desperately, trying and failing to raise his head to watch the screen to find out whether his boyfriend was still showing him that cock that he loved so much or that handsome face he was in love with too.

“Gonna wait,” Blake spit out, accent thick like only sex could get it, “So you can watch me come, darling, now finish for me, get those long pretty fingers nice and deep in you and grip yourself tight and good.”

Adam did, sobbing through a bone-deep orgasm that left him trembling and tingling all over, warm and loose and heavy-eyed. He crawled on the mattress to retrieve the iPad, watching with his jaw slack and his breathing still wild as Blake got off and spilled heavy, creamy seed onto his hand and licked a bit off of his skin just like Adam liked to do when they were together.

Blake fell on the toilet seat, panting messily, his cock lying soft on his clothed thigh.

Adam licked his lips when their eyes met again, grinning when he noticed just how sweaty and flushed Blake’s face was.

“Adam,” Blake called, longing and fondness so ingrained in his tone that Adam stared at him, speechless, “I’ll be there soon.”

“Yeah, okay,” he agreed softly, smiling as he tucked his chin against his chest and looked at his lover from beneath his lashes, “See you.”


	9. against the wall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ETA: this follows up from the previous fill.

It took everything in him not to throw himself into Blake’s arms when he saw him, opting for a tight, long hug and letting Blake keep an arm around his waist as he greeted everybody and suffered through the dirty looks Adam’s friends gave him like he wasn’t expecting or deserved anything else.

They spent the first afternoon together hanging out as they prepared for their concert, Blake clapping obnoxiously loud and trying—and failing—to whistle at them after the sound check that Adam used to wiggle his butt and quirk his eyebrows at him, still not sure about where the line between riling Blake up and teasing him really was but willing to find out all the same.

Blake watched him perform intently from backstage, smiling with his dimples every time Adam turned to look at him and opening his arms wide the second Adam could run to him and cling to his neck once they were done for the night.

They kissed hungrily in the van, Adam occupying his favorite seat in Blake’s lap as his boyfriend’s big hands encased his waist and flushed him to his broad, warm body. Adam moaned, muffled by his lover’s skilled lips, trembling with just how good it felt to have Blake’s hands on him again. He’d missed their weight so much, those long fingers holding him in all the right places, that every day without it had been a nightmare.

His bandmates kept chatting around them, quite used to them being all over each other whenever they could, and waved them off once they reached their hotel and Blake pulled Adam to an elevator to pin him against the wall and cover him with his bigger frame, protecting them both from the camera in it and doing a spectacular job at turning Adam’s legs to jelly with just his tongue and his lips on his mouth.

They fumbled with the keycard to get the door open, neither of them willing to let go of each other, and Blake was kicking off his boots and unbuttoning Adam’s skinny jeans blindly as soon as he had the door against his back, busy as Adam kept him close by the short hairs of his nape so they could keep kissing and used his free hand to toss Blake’s belt aside with the ease of someone with hours and hours of practice.

Blake manhandled him to the wall beside the door once they’d both stripped, turning him around with sure hands on Adam’s hips as Adam heard him grunt, ripping a package with his teeth, and he really didn’t need any more directions to know where Blake was going with this.

He leaned his hands against the fancy wallpaper, standing on his tiptoes to arch his back and create an enticing curve to present his ass to his lover who wasted no time in sticking cold, slick fingers between Adam’s cheeks.

Blake found his entrance quickly, like iron drawn to a magnet, and rubbed and tugged at his pucker to warm the lube before pressing the tip of his middle finger in, making Adam gasp and widen his stance to make things easier for the both of them.

“God, please, just put it in me, baby,” he pleaded, unabashed, moaning and shivering as Blake’s lips got attached to his shoulder and pampered him with wet, lingering kisses that went up his neck until he reached his ear and sucked the lobe into his mouth sending waves of heat through Adam’s eager body.

“Damn, just a little bit longer,” Blake cursed, hoarse and desperate, two of his fingers already rubbing Adam’s smooth insides, “Don’t make me hurt you, sweetheart, I wouldn’t forgive myself.”

The country singer kept a firm hand spread wide on Adam’s right hipbone, forcing him to stay put instead of chasing the fingers Blake was fucking him and stretching him with. His hips rolled uselessly in tiny motions, little frustrated cries pouring out of his mouth as Blake shushed him and nuzzled his cheek.

Adam usually felt ridiculously small in his arms but this position enhanced the difference in their sizes so much he wasn’t sure it was a good idea at all. He choked when a third finger breached him, scratching the wall as his eyes fluttered close and he got lost in the feeling of Blake holding him easily in place and opening him right up like it was the best job he could find on Earth.

“I—I can’t,” he admitted, cheeks hot as he rubbed his forehead on the wallpaper, legs threatening to give way when Blake crooked his fingers inside of him and found that place that turned everything hotter and brighter and impossibly better.

“Shh, you can, darling, I’ll show you,” Blake contradicted him, pulling out quickly, the swollen head of his dick pressing against Adam’s entrance, his then free arm encompassing Adam’s middle to keep him up, “Just let me in. You always take it so well.”

Adam mewled lewdly as his lover pushed in, canting his hips to make the slide easier and panting loudly as he was fucked open, reaching back with an arm to circle Blake’s neck and hold on to him in the only way he could.

He cried out at finally being filled, hitting the wall with his fist as he felt Blake’s balls snug against his ass and the entire length of his erection inside him, hot and hard and perfect, chasing every thought away from his mind as Blake’s hips rocked into him in a steady, hypnotizing rhythm that had them both gasping and groaning, hurrying to press closer against each other.

“Oh yeah, yeah,” Adam babbled, gripping himself to start pumping his cock in counterpoint to Blake’s thrusts, his entire body tingling and overheating with pleasure just like he loved, “ _Blake_ , fuck.”

His hand was too dry but he really didn’t give a damn, not when Blake nosed his face and lured him into a filthy, open-mouthed kiss that had Adam’s eyes watering and almost falling shut as he made those small, dirty _ah-ah_ noises that he knew drove Blake absolutely crazy and that he couldn’t for the life of him keep in.

He could swear he’d been made for this, for Blake to hold him up and slip into him forcefully, practically rattling Adam’s head against the wall, and he keened when Blake got so into it that he pushed Adam’s feet off the ground a little bit, grunting something wild, the snapping of his hips too fast for Adam to fall off his dick despite of having no leverage aside from the thick length sliding in and out of him.

He quickened the motions of his hand on his dick, stuttering and struggling for breaths as his climax hit him like a sledgehammer and he painted the wall in front of him with his release.

He was still floating in the lingering high when he felt Blake spilling into him, both of his hands grasping Adam’s hips as if making sure not one drop would make it out and cried out his name like both prayer and curse. He gasped, pressing back as his lover ground against him in circling motions to empty himself in him, and moaning low in his throat when Blake’s long fingers stroked his lower belly and pressed there as if to get Adam to feel his dick inside him even more.

He shuddered as Blake peppered his nape and shoulders with kisses, his toes barely touching the floor beneath them, and held on to Blake’s forearms with a long, sated sigh.

His lover didn’t seem in a rush to let him go and that suited Adam just fine. It’d been way too long since they had each other and he’d gladly stay impaled in Blake’s dick for hours even if it got uncomfortable which had never ever happened so far.

“See? All good,” Blake murmured, licking the shell of his ear, just a touch smug.

Adam smiled, tossing his head back to lean on the taller man’s shoulder, and focused on how absolutely wrecked and satisfied Blake sounded instead.


	10. doggy style

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: dub-con.

His back smarted as it hit the wall, the back of his head protected from the blow only by the hand Blake was using to tug his hair and guide his head to whatever angle he wanted.

Adam huffed into their kiss, trying and failing to get Blake off of him. His lover’s grip was unyielding and painful but that wasn’t the reason he wanted to break free; he was just fucking tired of Blake’s jealousy and the frankly fantastic make-up sex they had after each of the country singer’s outbursts was—well, not getting old, but it seemed like it was all they could do lately.

Blake pinned him harder against his front door, his tongue flicking his in such a way that it made his knees weak and heat erupt from under his skin no matter how much he tried to fight it. He hit Blake’s back with his fists, angry at himself for giving in so easily but mostly angry at his stupid ass boyfriend who insisted on keeping them in a constant state of frustration that they could only shake off with sex.

“It’s not my fucking _fault_ ,” he hissed, his lips stinging with the force they’ve been using to suck each other’s faces, “It’s not like I can tell people I’m taken!”

“Shut _up_ ,” Blake snarled, almost managing to scare him and definitely getting him to freeze, giving the taller man plenty of time to drag Adam to the ottoman in the living room and yank his jeans down before pushing him face-first onto it, “Don’t act like it’s mine, you know damn well why we can’t come out!”

He landed on his hands and knees, struggling to get up even as Blake fumbled with his belt and zipper and took his cock out.

It was humiliating, how stupidly easy it was for his lover to hold him in place with just one arm around him, and even elbowing him gave Adam no chance to escape from yet another session of thorough, enthusiastic but entirely useless fucking.

“Stop—“ he gasped half-heartedly, yelping at feeling Blake’s barely wet fingers circling his rim and blinking back angry tears when his body betrayed him and just opened up to let his boyfriend in, “Blake, please,” he tried again, husky, hips already seeking to start a rhythm as Blake’s finger went right in to the second knuckle, “This won’t fix anything!”

“It sure will,” Blake drawled, and Adam could hear how crossed he still was over something so fucking silly as Adam talking with someone that kept coming on to him, “It’ll fix my mood and your attitude, at least for now.”

“Oh my God, you’re fucking impossible!” Adam complained, trying to get his knees to work and crawl away from his lover, “Don’t you see what you’re doing? You’re— _oh_ , oh fuck—“

“I’m what? I’m listening, sweetheart, what is it?” he could hear the smirk in Blake’s voice but could only moan as his fingertips brushed and pressed exactly the right spot inside him, the country singer’s arm on his middle sliding down so he could grip Adam’s cock instead and jerk him off messily as he stretched him open.

If Adam was anything it was a slave to his own pleasure and he gave up trying to reason with his lover, choosing to enjoy the ride and starting to rock his hips eagerly as he felt Blake’s cock smearing pre-come on his thigh.

His muscles were still taunt when Blake pushed in, the sensation of being filled so well and so suddenly making his body spasm and temperature rise even more, a sheen of sweat already pouring out to coat his skin and make every noise of their fucking even louder and dirtier as Blake took him from behind, both hands on Adam’s slim hips to lead their rocking together and leave Adam no choice but to follow.

He licked his hand and wrapped it around himself, keeping it in a tight fist to fuck into as Blake’s cock reached impossibly deeper inside him and made his eyes roll back in his head as he moaned like he’d been in a dry spell for years and was fucking desperate to come over and over until he couldn’t move.

He was going to be so sore after this.

“You’re mine,” Blake reminded him in a groan, the fabric of his jeans chaffing Adam’s most sensitive places, “Say it.”

“Fuck you,” he grit out because no, Blake hadn’t earned to hear it and he was still mad at him.

Blake responded by pulling Adam’s body closer to the edge of the ottoman as his thrusts turned two times quicker and harder and his fingers went back to the back of Adam’s neck to tug at his hair and make him arch against him as if he knew damn well how much Adam was fighting not to give him that much satisfaction just yet.

He still didn't know how Blake did it, how absolutely in sync they were that every push and pull of their bodies was just what Adam needed and got him lost in a haze of heat as they chased for the best kind of release they could have and that they could only find together.

“I fucking hate you, I hate—“ he shook and screamed as his orgasm all but assaulted him, white hot pleasure rippling through every inch of him, his voice betraying him too as he heard himself calling out for Blake again.

“Adam, God, I love you,” Blake grunted against his nape, letting go of his hair to fold around him as he emptied himself into him in small but sharp thrusts, his arms embracing the lead singer as if he was something precious to be held instead of just a convenient body to fuck.

Adam was already loose under him but sighed and relaxed even more, craning his neck to nuzzle Blake and part his lips for a lazy but deep kiss that he craved and had learned to expect in moments like these.

He tried to find the anger inside of him but it’d vanished, just like it always did after they fucked it out, and shivered but pressed against the wet kisses Blake was showering his shoulders with after pushing down the leather jacket he was wearing enough to reveal the white tank top Adam had underneath.

“Hot tub?” Blake asked, raspy and hopeful.

Adam’s eyes slid close at last, a single tear making it past his lashes to tickle its way down and fall off his chin, unnoticed.

“Yeah,” he agreed softly, “Sounds good.”


	11. dom/sub

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is shitty. sorry.

Adam sprawled on the table, making sure to look every bit as needy and horny as he felt.

He splayed his legs as he lied on his side and lazily stroked the obvious bulge in the front of the tight leather pants he’d chosen for the night, his body loosening up even more when he closed his eyes and remembered just how well the material hugged his legs and how good he looked.

He had a mask over his eyes and the lights were dim enough he didn’t have to worry about the anonymity the tattoos on his chest would never allow otherwise and being on display like this while being shielded from the world was exhilarating.

Truth was, he liked it a little rough, between other things, every once in a while. He got bored easily and that sadly included sex, which meant sometimes fucking some leggy gorgeous thing while she moaned and clung to him just didn’t cut it.

He’d learned sex with men was far more satisfying, something no one really actually knew. His friends and family were aware of his bisexuality but it wasn’t like Adam could go to them and admit he liked a nice big and hard cock shoved up his ass the most. The topic had to come up somehow for it not to be so—well, so fucking awkward, and that hadn’t happened.

He shook his head, trying to let his mind go blank and just focus on attracting a good Dom who’d take him home for the night. His eyes fluttered open as he played with the collar around his neck, the still empty ring there making him pout a little bit. He usually managed to hook up with some handsome stranger in five, maybe ten minutes but it felt like he’d been there for at least half an hour and no one was finding him pretty enough.

He sighed, suddenly sad, and stopped touching himself, hoping like hell he wouldn’t end up going home alone for the night. That had never happened since he’d come back to L.A. after their last tour but it’d happened once or twice before and every time he turned ten times more stupid than he usually was. And that was a lot.

That would mean he’d end up leaving drunk, pathetic voice mails in Anne’s phone just because he’d remember he sucked so much he apparently didn’t deserve to have a nice girlfriend or a Domme or Dom to take care of him.

He was swallowing down frustrated tears and sitting up on the table when a huge ass guy strolled to him quickly as if scared to miss him, his outfit of black ripped jeans and a black button-down not quite leather but making him look about as hot as leather would.

He was just the right side of bulky and the hand playing offhandedly with the chain he had at the ready for a Sub of his liking was so big Adam’s throat went more than a little bit dry.

“Going somewhere already, sweetheart?” the man drawled, warm and silky and husky, “If that’s so, I was hoping that would be with me,” his long fingers brushed Adam’s chin surely, tipping his head up to trace the line of his jaw and make him shiver, “What do you say?”

Adam’s breath hitched, a guilty twinge almost making him wince too. Fuck, the guy sounded and looked so much like Blake he didn’t know if this was a good idea—scratch that, he actually was one hundred percent aware that it was the worst, the crappiest idea ever—but he’d prepped what felt like _hours_ ago and wanted dick so bad he was willing to deal with the awkwardness of it.

It wasn’t like he’d never wanted to get in Blake’s pants.

This was about as close as he was ever going to get, probably. Better make the most of it, right?

He swallowed words that would be too shaky and exposed his neck instead, tossing his head back and closing his eyes in complete submission to show the Dom standing between his parted legs that he was game.

The guy practically whooped in triumph, the chain clicking closed on Adam’s collar almost instantly. His obvious enthusiasm was exactly what Adam needed and he giggled, both happy and amused, and went eagerly when the man pushed him to the edge of the table with a firm hand on the small of his back.

He couldn’t help the surprised moan that left his mouth when their lips met, the Dom’s lips so plush and soft and skilled in tugging his to open up he did so right away, practically mewling into what had to be the best French kiss he’d ever had as he held on to the guy’s broad shoulders hesitantly, letting his legs close around his hips when the Dom put an approving hand over one of Adam’s and welcomed the unsolicited touch with no trouble.

Most men liked to show him off for a while before leaving the club but this dude was the exact opposite, dragging Adam to the lockers where their stuff was between gropes and filthy, delicious kisses that had Adam’s head spinning.

Shit, it was a good thing the guy wasn’t into public sex or anything like that; he was pretty sure he would’ve let him do just about anything to him, just to get him not to let go of him any time soon.

He helped Adam into a plain white tee hastily, putting his own big leather jacket over Adam’s shoulders when he seemed to realize that was all he had to wear and steered him to a black SUV outside, grabbing Adam’s hips with both hands to make him straddle his lap as soon as they were both safely inside.

“You look like a dream, honey,” his Dom for the night praised, his voice so deep with want making Adam’s cock twitch in his pants, his hand clasping the chain in Adam’s neck firmly as if he never planned to let go. He knew his lover had felt it perfectly, judging by the groan and the grinding that followed, “Jesus, and you feel even better against me.”

Adam pleaded with his eyes for more kisses and thankfully his Dom obliged and kept both their tongues occupied for the rest of the trip to his place, his hands alternating between squeezing Adam’s butt cheeks and stroking his back beneath the layers of clothes, tugging impatiently and almost resentfully at the waistband of his pants every time his fingers bumped into it.

He honestly didn’t remember how they got out of the car or into the dude’s place, too caught up in the moment and trembling with anticipation of how exactly this guy was going to take him, letting him lead the way while practically humping one of the man’s thighs as he was kept flushed to his bigger frame by his collar and a warm palm on his waist.

His blood ran cold the minute the lights were on and he could look at the man properly, recognizing those blue eyes and salt and pepper curls instantly.

“Blake!” he squeaked, covering his mouth with a hand after they both had tossed their black, useless leather masks away. Obviously Blake had recognized him too, “Oh my God, I’m—I didn’t—I mean,” he panted, taking a moment to watch the guarded look that had appeared in Blake’s eyes and noticing how he hadn’t let go of the chain still linked to Adam’s collar. That had to mean something, right? It had to, “If—If you still want me, I—I want to stay. I want you.”

He hoped to all hell Blake wasn’t going to laugh at him, either at his stammering or his admission, but far from it his co-worker and friend perked up and regained the confident air he’d had before, leading Adam to a thick rug in front of an unused hearth and undressing him in quick, efficient tugs as his eyes traveled over every inch of his body, his right hand never easing its grip on the chain.

Blake’s thumb brushed one of Adam's nipples as he spread his thighs for him, angling his hips just right to make sure he’d see how slick and ready he was down there. He cried out in surprise and pleasure when his friend-turned-lover responded by pulling at his collar and forcing him to arch his back sharply enough to make his bones pop—and that was saying something, since yoga kept him lithe enough for that not to happen easily.

There was a dangerous glint in those bright, usually playful and warm eyes when he lost sight of them, his head upside down as he was held in place and heard Blake’s free hand opening his zipper, yelping when he gripped Adam’s hip tight enough to bruise and pulled him up so he could kneel and shove his dick right into him.

With anyone else, Adam would be kicking away and screaming ‘red’ for them to stop, but knowing it was Blake’s cock pushing bare into him, feeling it hot and hard and thick stretching his rim wide, that kept him calm and made him trust enough to let Blake do whatever he wanted—which was apparently fucking the living shit out of Adam, first of all, and that suited the lead singer just fine.

It was exactly what he wanted.

“ _Blake_ ,” he whimpered, loud and hungry and lewd, his jaw staying open as the head of Blake’s cock made it in briskly.

“That’s right,” Blake grunted, sounding both crossed and pleased as Adam’s entrance opened up little by little around him, allowing him to fuck his way inside the smaller man in short but sharp thrusts, “It’s me who’s taking your slutty ass tonight, fuck, look at you, open and wet and waiting for anyone to fuck you.”

“Ah!” Adam screamed as Blake bottomed out, his body shivering and sweating from head to toe as he rode the thin line between pain and pleasure. He didn’t do this nearly often enough for the stretch to be easy and Blake was so big Adam’s eyelashes were already damp with tears, a few drops falling down to his hair as he was roughly held in place, “Ah, ah, _ah_! Blake—“

He choked on his own breath when Blake’s hips were particularly harsh, the grip on his collar almost suffocating as he dug blunt nails into the carpet and forced himself not to reach up to touch yet. He only allowed his legs to circle Blake’s middle and focused on the stiff weight of his own cock, bouncing against his belly as he was pounded into the ground.

“It’s Master tonight,” the country singer snarled, his accent thick and raspy, “Unless you call Master every cock that gets in you.”

He shook his head frantically, hoping Blake would get the message.

He was telling the truth, amazingly enough. Most men he’d slept with had either gagged him or didn’t give a damn about names, content to hear Adam’s pleased and slutty moans as he was fucked and not demanding anything else.

“M-Master,” he stuttered, moaning in relief and delight when Blake picked up the pace instead of stopping, scrambling to cling to the taller man’s neck when he hauled him up by the collar and sat so Adam could ride his cock on his lap as if to remind Adam exactly how much bigger he was, “Master! _Oh_ , please—“

“Should’ve done this when I first saw you,” Blake grunted, leaning down to muffle Adam’s stream of moans with a deep, lingering kiss, “Should’ve kept you around my cock just like this.”

“Yeah,” Adam breathed, his eyes half-lidded as his hips moved up and down, chasing Blake's to get and keep Blake’s length deep inside him just like he craved. Blake hadn’t brushed his prostate not even once but just having him rubbing his inner walls and feeling and hearing him going mad fucking him felt amazing.

He almost came just like that, untouched and too fucking soon and without permission, when Blake’s teeth dug into the tender skin around his collarbone.

The tight clenching of his passage at the stimulation proved to be too much for Blake who spilled up into him with a stunned expression, his hips thrusting in tiny moves as he rode his orgasm.

Adam blushed even more, wide-eyed and breathless, quite aware this was the first and only time he’d ever had someone’s come inside him. He kinda loved the feeling which was very, very bad. He couldn’t tell if that was him being the worst kind of cockslut or just the disgustingly obvious crush he’d always had on Blake.

He stopped moving, clutching the hairs in the back of Blake’s head between his fingers just like he’d always wanted to do.

They stared at each other, Blake’s hands never leaving his collar and his right hipbone, Adam’s cock still hard between them, until Blake nuzzled his nose and kissed him rather sweetly as he got them horizontal, his balls still snug against Adam’s ass.

Adam moaned in appreciation when he clenched around him experimentally and confirmed that yeah, Blake was still half-hard and hopefully just taking a small break from fucking him.

The country singer fondled him deftly for a few minutes, kissing his neck and lapping all over his skin before nibbling one of his nipples. Adam lied beneath him meekly, trusting him to get him off exactly when he needed to and not a moment sooner, letting the pleasure cloud his mind and flood every cell in his body until he was trembling and tingling with it, not aware of anything than wasn’t Blake’s dick in him or his mouth and hands on him.

When he started moving again he got the angle right from the get go, hitting Adam's sweet spot almost ruthlessly, and it took everything in Adam not to lose it right there but he wanted more than anything for Blake to want him again so he tried harder than ever and didn’t finish until he heard the coarse, winded permission against his temple and came with a loud cry, seeing white for long seconds and going actually light-headed with how good it’d been.

He moaned again at feeling Blake spilling into him for a second time, deciding that he didn’t fucking care whether it was Blake’s dick or Blake himself that he was besotted with.

Either way, he was screwed.

He’d take what he could get.

“Don’t go to the club anymore, Adam,” Blake whispered in his ear, command and plea all at once, his fingers almost gentle as they touched the collar around Adam’s neck, “Come here. I’ll give you what you need.”

He blinked up at Blake, limbs still holding on to him with everything he had, and hoped this wasn’t a terrible idea.

“I will, Master,” he promised, chest still heaving, “I’ll come right here to you.”

Blake smiled with his dimples, his fingers playing with the chain and tugging lightly at his collar, just enough for him to remind him it was there, to remind Adam who he’d given himself up to.

“That’s my good boy.”


	12. fingering

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm not really good at keeping these short, ugh. but here.

“I want to kiss him so bad,” Blake had admitted years ago and he’d been so honest it still amazed him no one had taken his words seriously, words that he felt sharply right in the middle of his chest every time he as much as glanced at Adam’s direction, every time he saw that gorgeous, slightly crooked smile on his face.

His friend had been quick to come to check on him once he’d found out about Blake’s divorce, surprising the country star yet again by not being one bit mad about him not confiding in him about it.

“You’re not angry at me?” he’d asked, dumbfounded as he watched Adam restocking his fridge and scrunching his nose as he threw away rotten food that Blake was pretty sure had been there for months.

Adam had paused, shaking his head as his eyes got impossibly soft, “This isn’t about me, cowboy, it’s about you,” he’d replied, stretching through the island to smooch Blake’s cheek, “So how do you feel about brunch?”

Blake smiled for real for what felt like the first time in ages, kissing the side of Adam’s neck until the smaller man squirmed and hit the arms he had securely around the lead singer’s waist with a spatula and called him gross, complaining no one would eat unless Blake let go of him already which he'd done eventually, if reluctantly.

There’d been a tornado warning a couple of days after Adam had arrived and he’d taken pity on the man after watching him shiver and pretend he wasn’t scared shitless about something that was very familiar and natural to Blake but that had to be strange and terrifying for someone from California.

He sneakily made sure they’d fall asleep in his bed and curled around Adam’s back, holding him tight to help him rest despite the ruckus of the wind and the heavy rain mixed with hail outside.

It was funny how the ranch still felt quiet and empty for him without Miranda and the dogs in it, even on moments like this.

It made him wonder who was getting the most out of cuddling; him or Adam, who’d only stirred lightly a couple of times in hours, quickly closing his eyes again and pressing back against him when he seemed to remember where he was and who he was with.

“You good?” he’d ask hoarsely every now and then, even offering to take over watch to let Blake sleep.

“Uh-huh,” he agreed softly every time, nuzzling Adam’s neck and even daring to brush a strong, tattooed shoulder blade with his lips, “Go back to sleep. We’re good.”

He felt like he’d been out drifting in a storm for years, lost in the chaos of a tornado like a piece of debris carried by the ruthless wind, so he wasn’t really shocked to discover having Adam in his arms like this was exactly the kind of medicine his wounded heart needed.

The younger man had been doing his damnedest to make himself useful, cooking for them both and taking Blake outdoors every day to joke and fool around and remind him of all the things he could still enjoy.

He’d never asked, not even once, about what had happened with Miranda.

Truth was, Blake still didn’t know. He wasn’t perfect; he was always joking, almost always drinking, and very seldom being the kind of husband a woman like her deserved but that hadn’t been it. She’d loved him dearly in all his imperfection just like he’d loved her in her ups and downs, in the good and the bad, it just hadn’t been enough.

Being comfortable with each other and being the close friends they were stopped being a good reason to stay together. They hadn’t slept together in almost a year by the time they finally had the guts to break up.

He was glad he didn’t have to struggle to come up with an answer, not with Adam.

The storm had died down both outside and within him by the time Adam’s pretty hazel eyes fluttered open, a chirpy laugh leaving his lips as he caught sight of Blake right beside him staring at him, his bare legs reaching to entwine with Blake’s in a loose hold that still made them both acutely aware of a certain condition in their nether regions they hadn’t been paying attention to.

“Oops,” Adam giggled, covering his mouth with a hand as his eyes sparkled in the dim light of the early morning, “Sorry, man. Shit, this is awkward.”

“It doesn’t have to be,” he pointed out, craning his neck to nuzzle Adam’s nose and let his startled face grow out of focus, the surprised and soft noise the smaller man made more than enough to let him know exactly how Adam felt, “I still want to kiss you, always have.”

“Blake,” Adam breathed, so wounded and so goddamn hopeful he had to pull him closer, had to dare to make the most of this even if it fucked their friendship up for good.

He’d always been a selfish man so he stopped thinking about it after the first brush of their lips together. Judging by the strong grip Adam instantly got of the curls on Blake’s nape, he’d be willing to bet the rock star didn’t care about it either, not right then.

They were quick to undress each other, eager as they were to go back to hold on to the other tight enough to forget everything else existed, clothes falling haphazardly off the bed and sheets being kicked off so that nothing could stand between them.

All the cameras in the world couldn’t make justice to just how absolutely perfect Adam really was, from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. His hair was still short from when he’d shaved all of it but he looked hot and sweet to Blake, young and beautiful as he let himself be pinned down and arched against the firm hands Blake used to pry his legs open.

He brushed his lips against the slightly coarse skin on Adam’s cheeks, working his way down the warm body beneath him with teasing sucks and licks that had Adam trembling and cursing, battling against him to get him up to his mouth to steal the hottest, most perfect kiss he’d ever shared, Adam's tongue and lips practically knowing better than him exactly how much of each he wanted.

Every flick of their lips sent a rush of electricity down his spine, want feeling like the new oxygen in his veins that pumped his limbs to move and touch Adam in ways he hoped like hell no one had ever done before.

The whimper that left Adam’s throat when Blake’s thumbs traveled boldly to the skin beneath his balls and pressed there as his tongue swirled playfully near his navel felt like the best kind of caress around his cock, making it jerk eagerly almost in sync with Adam’s length.

There was a question in the tip of his tongue that Adam answered by stretching a clumsy arm to the drawer in the bedside table and pushing the small bottle of lube Blake kept there for lonely nights right into his palm when he reached for it.

“I don’t know if—“ Adam stuttered, nervous and flushed down to his chest, his eyes zeroing in the impressive cock between Blake’s long legs before darting to the side, suddenly and endearingly demure, “If it’ll fit, but—you know, you can, like, try—“

Blake beamed before crushing Adam against the bed with his weight, too eager to kiss his happiness right into Adam’s heart as his thumb circled the tight ring of muscle gently, not pressing in just yet.

Adam was so warm and smooth down there he doubted he’d need more than a hand on him to blow his load right there.

“Next time,” he reassured, letting go of Adam’s bottom lip just enough to speak, “Right now I just want to watch you come, darling.”

“Blake,” Adam hiccupped, looking up at him in surprise as if he had no idea how close Blake was to coming just by being able to touch and kiss and hold, just by the show of trust Adam was gifting him with.

He sucked the skin right over the bone on Adam’s shoulder, hoping to leave a mark there that not even the dark ink could conceal. The younger man shivered under him and hooked a leg on Blake’s elbow as he fumbled to pour some lube onto his fingers, tossing it aside as soon as he had it slipping off his hand.

Adam was all muscle and sharp angles, the slightly hairy skin on his legs another strange feeling that Blake decided that he liked very much along with the burn on his face from the kisses they’d been sharing, but the way his insides seemed to suck his forefinger right up and squeeze was familiar enough to make him grunt and hump the air as he knelt on the bed.

“Gosh, you’re so tight,” he breathed lowly, so in awe he couldn’t keep his jaw shut, “I could split you right up with my cock, fuck your tight little ass and keep you wide open around me for hours.”

“Yeah, fuck,” Adam cried out, letting Blake push his other leg to the side meekly so he’d be spread-eagled for him, his hands gripping the crook of Blake’s neck almost painfully, “Just, just give it to me.”

He licked the tip of Adam’s flushed, lean cock, flicking the slit with his tongue before breathing warmly on it, relishing how his lover’s whole body seized with just that. He got the rest of his finger in then, shutting his eyes tight for a moment to get a grip and not hurt Adam by taking him too soon.

He vowed to always put Adam's pleasure first, to always put _Adam_ first, he vowed it quietly to himself and resolved to honor his promise right from the start.

He prayed it'd be enough not to take yet another great thing from him, enough to let him keep this for as long as they lived even if they never got their _in sickness and in health_.

“Patience, honey,” he chided hoarsely, “Let me take care of you.”

Adam’s hips rolled in tiny thrusts as Blake suckled gently around the tip, pulling his finger in and out of him until it slid in and out easily, gliding his lips off of Adam’s cock to suck another mark on Adam’s hipbone when he made a startled, gurgling little noise at taking Blake’s middle finger in.

It seemed to be too much for the moment it took Blake to get his fingertips to curl and reach a place inside Adam that had the skilled musician finally arching again and moaning in that high-pitched voice that Blake loved so much.

“Blake!” he screamed as Blake forced him down with a palm flat on his belly and only allowed his own wrist and fingers to command how he’d fuck Adam, “OhgodBlakeplease—“

“Want to watch you, Adam, no cheating,” Blake drawled, scowling in disapproval when one of the front man’s hands tried to reach for the leaking hardness between his own legs and groaning, pleased and amazed, when his lover went back to curl a sweaty hand on the side of his neck instead, “That’s it, darling, you’re so good to me.”

“I’m not—“ Adam moaned, louder and louder as Blake sped up the steady thrusting of his fingers into him, licking his lips to soothe the dryness in his throat at the sight and sound of his hand slipping in and out of a place Adam most likely had never allowed anyone else in, “I’m not doing any—thing, _ah_!”

“You are,” Blake countered, slowing down to start swirling a third finger around Adam’s entrance, eagerly trying to coax it open some more, “Now give me just a little bit more, sweetheart, I know you can.”

Adam thrashed beneath him, his arms falling off his neck to fist the sheets and grunt through the blunt of yet another thick finger stretching him but his thighs never jerked closed, the grip he had on Blake’s arm with the back of his knee only growing stronger as Blake fucked him open with his fingers.

He knew both of them were imagining the same thing; his fingers being replaced by Blake’s big cock, his much bigger and broader frame crushing Adam as he pounded him into the mattress.

He learned that Adam closed his eyes and gaped when he reached his orgasm, his voice stammering and high as he spilled creamy seed on his belly, the incessant touch of Blake’s fingers in that sweet spot in him getting him to mewl and spurt even more after a couple of minutes.

“Fucking Christ, Adam,” he swore, stunned and so very turned on by it the thought of stopping didn’t even register as a possibility, “Did you just come again?”

Adam nodded fitfully, trying and failing to open his eyes through the thick sheen of tears Blake could see clinging to his long lashes, an incoherent and incredibly obscene sound pouring out of his throat as his whole body went lax and his breathing seemed to sync with the thrusting of Blake’s fingers, quick and so very filthy Blake felt himself just a few moments from tippling over the edge.

When Adam hiccupped his way through a third climax only to spill what little he had left after Blake had literally milked him dry, he gripped himself roughly and finished in three harsh pumps, painting Adam’s fluttering hole with his release and pushing a little bit of it inside with the tip once he was done as his whole body jerked and tickled.

He felt hot all over, heart jackhammering in his chest, breaths fast and shallow as he tried and failed to come down from the high.

He wiped his fingers absently on the sheets, finally allowing himself to collapse on top of Adam who made a pleased little noise and clung to his back as the stickiness of his come got on Blake’s skin as well, neither of them giving much of a damn about it at the moment.

He granted them a few minutes to half get their breaths back and half kiss slowly and messily, sneaking a hand down Adam’s body again to test how stretched he was after what they’d done and smooching his cheekbone as two of his fingers went in easily.

Adam was hot and slick inside, still virgin-tight despite of Blake’s ministrations, and the small sigh he took him back in with nearly got Blake hard again.

He knew right then he could literally have his fingers—and after a couple more times of this, his cock—for hours in him and Adam would just whimper and take it; the way his eyes rolled to the back of his head and how he tossed back his head told him as much.


	13. rimming

Heat swirled in his groin and belly as Blake pulled Adam’s hips just a little bit higher on his thighs, his lithe lover’s body half sprawled on him and half on the coffee table in front the couch they’d been watching some boring rerun of a golf tournament on.

He licked harder on the creased skin of Adam’s pucker, smiling as his lover whined and pressed his ass closer to his face. It was petty probably but he loved distracting Adam from other things he enjoyed with some spur-of-the-moment, mind-blowing sex and he was pretty sure that was one of the things the front man loved the most about their relationship.

He switched his hands to Adam’s pert little butt, spreading his cheeks to get the tip of his tongue into him lightly before licking his rim insistently, making sure Adam would feel every bit of what he was doing all the way down to his toes.

“Oh God Blake fuck, _fuck_ ,” Adam marveled, trying to get his pants further down his legs but not quite managing since straddling Blake’s legs and fucking his face like a desperate slut had him preoccupied, “So good, baby.”

He felt his gorgeous boyfriend giving up and going back to lean on his elbows on the table, his head hanging low as he all but wailed at getting more of Blake’s smart, thick tongue in him.

Blake leaked inside his jeans, pre-come gathering and clinging uncomfortably to his boxers as he stretched Adam up in one of his favorite ways; he loved how his sexy lover was so sensitive he could come just from this.

He loved it even more when he got to fuck him slow and steady and deep until Adam got hard again and came on his cock and nothing else, limp like a ragdoll after two intense orgasms and letting Blake manhandle him and do anything he wanted to him.

He stuck his nose between Adam’s cheeks, lapping his rim relentlessly before pushing his tongue back in, going as far as he could get and feeling Adam trembling and pushing back, loud and shameless as he voiced his pleasure drowning every single sound coming from the TV.

It was a pity he was missing the pretty sight of his lover’s back arching like a bow and the pinched expression of awe and lust on that face he loved so much, how red his cheeks could get and how his mouth would drop open like there was nothing he could do to stop himself from giving in to Blake’s every whim.

The little, stuttered _oh_ ’s pouring out of Adam’s lips almost made up for it.

His tongue was a bit numb by the time Adam came with a whole-body shudder and a low, long moan that seemed to be almost punched out of him.

He went meekly when Blake pulled him up to his lap and sat him on his cock after hastily pushing his own clothes down enough, wriggling his hips teasingly to make Blake groan loudly and turning slightly to smirk at him like the cocky little shit he was.

It was a good thing Blake also adored to fuck that right out of his face, he thought, hips picking up a rhythm easily that had Adam tossing his head on his shoulder and panting as he tried to get something to hold on to and could only find Blake’s arms around his waist for it.

“That’s it, hun,” he approved, low and husky, spreading a hand over Adam’s flat belly, imagining that if he reached deep enough he could feel his dick right about there, “Cling to me and take it.”

Adam kicked a little with his legs, the remote and their phones and who knows what else falling from the table as it rattled and the couch squeaked with their fucking.

Blake chased his own release for a while, enjoying how Adam made soft approving noises and left it up to him whether he got to come again or not.

He smiled against Adam’s skin, kissing the crook of his neck.

He would never leave his boyfriend hanging like that but teasing him was a sport he would always be fond of.


	14. 69

Adam turned off his alarm with a huff, already knowing it was going to be one fucking long day on set. His team needed so much work he hardly had time to munch a sandwich these days and he didn’t really want to admit it, but not seeing Blake for hours was kind of getting to him too.

As if reading his thoughts, his big hick of a boyfriend reached out to stop him from tossing his legs off the side of the bed, pulling his middle back to him as he peppered his nape with warm, sleepy kisses that sent shivers down his spine and had a needy whine making it out of his mouth before he could stop it.

Shit, when had it been the last time they had slept in late and fuck each other’s brains stupid? He honestly couldn’t remember.

“Let go,” he grit out halfheartedly, “We’re gonna be late, asshole.”

“Fuck them,” Blake replied, hoarse and about as horny as Adam felt if the big bulge he could feel pressing insistently against his ass was anything to go by, “They’ll wait for us.”

What was Adam supposed to say to that? Neither of them had ever been late and he knew both would feel guilty as hell about wasting rehearsal time of their teams but maybe—just maybe, he thought as Blake manhandled him to lie on the mattress and tugged his boxers down and off his ankles easily, maybe they could find a compromise.

He moaned, long and startled and absolutely thrilled, when Blake got right down to business and took him confidently into his mouth, stretching his plush lips around him to start suckling with an ease that made it seem like they did this every day.

Adam trembled and let his legs fall open more, welcoming Blake to nestle between his thighs as he gasped and praised his handsome, skilled lover in awed, rushed whispers.

An idea hit him as Blake was devotedly lapping at his sack, his hands big enough for his thumbs to press that sensitive spot behind his balls as his fingers remained spread wide on his ass.

“Stop,” he hitched, his tone so wanton Blake pulled off and stared at him with an incredulous eyebrow raised in both mockery and challenge.

“Really, Adam?” he asked, lips glistening with spit and eyes dark with so much want that the pop singer knew he’d be helpless to get them both to see reason if Blake just pushed him a little bit more and they’d spend all morning having sex in every position they could find to slot together just like they needed.

“Shut up and come here, stupid idiot,” he cut his lover off, enveloping his broad back with his arms to get him to lie down by his side just like he wanted.

“Adam, Jesus,” Blake marveled as he crawled upside down on the bed and locked his lips around the tip of his boyfriend’s cock, swirling his tongue around it to taste and tease more pre-come out of him.

He smirked as much as he could with his mouth full, feeling cocky as fuck when Blake’s body responded to just the beginning of a blowjob with a shudder and a roll of his hips, the country singer’s mouth taking a couple of tries to take Adam’s dick back into his throat.

It was his turn to lose control when Blake groped his ass and pushed him all the way in, ripping a piercing, elated cry out of him that got muffled by the girth in his own mouth.

He almost choked as Blake’s hips made the most of how slack his jaw was to thrust right in, unapologetic and fast, and gagged a little bit but didn’t let Blake pull back by gripping that extra inch he still couldn’t take in, his fingers rolling his balls in silent apology as he tried to breathe through his nose and went back to suck him off.

They were both so good at this it was almost impossible not to lose it every now and then, whenever the other did something they especially loved that made heat travel like the most delicious itch all over their skin and their hips picked up the pace almost in sync with the wild thumping of Adam’s love-struck, stupid heart.

He could feel Blake groaning around him, throat vibrating enticingly as Adam’s hips went a little bit crazy to chase the wet, amazing suction there, and he kicked the headboard as his eyes rolled back in his head when Blake’s nose nuzzled his pubes and his fingers dug into the crack between his cheeks.

Blood rushed in his ears as he felt himself close to the edge, fumbling to press the heel of his hand right behind Blake’s balls, wailing and arching as Blake hollowed his cheeks around him and tongued the sensitive vein on the underside of his dick.

He emptied himself right in the back of his lover’s throat, drinking a bit of Blake’s seed before the taller man pulled off his mouth to get sticky, white come all over Adam’s panting, blushing face.

He turned on the bed so they could be face to face before getting up and finally starting their work day, staring at Blake with one eye since he’d gotten the other dirty with come.

“Ugh, gross,” he complained just because.

Blake chuckled, wiping his eye with his thumb as he cupped the side of his face and leaned in for a dirty kiss filled with their taste.

Their phones went off with frantic calls as they were still in the shower, kissing in between washing each other as the warm spray fell over their already heated skin.

Adam took a couple of Blake’s fingers into his mouth, looking at him straight in the eye with the tacit, dirty promise that he’d feel him and think of him all day with the help of the lingering ache in his jaw.

“We’re taking a day off soon,” Blake murmured, taking Adam’s earlobe right into his mouth.

Adam nodded, shuddering and reaching behind his lover to close the faucet as he struggled to stand on wobbly legs that only got weaker with Blake flushing him to his chest.

They arrived to the studio an hour late but it was definitely, completely worth it.


	15. sweet and passionate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fix-it for 'doggy style' 
> 
> (i tried not to rush it so it's kinda long and crappy :( )

Adam woke up with a gasp half an hour before his alarm, Blake’s arm still tight around his waist as the older man slept and his warm breath caressed the back of the front man’s neck.

He winced even before moving, feeling the bruises scattered on his body that stung even more once he started shimming out of Blake’s hold.

His lover didn’t stir but he did make a displeased grunt that made Adam smile slightly. The fact that Blake didn’t want to let go of him even unconscious eased the tightness around his heart enough that he didn’t care about the soreness in his body; he just cared about the way the frown on Blake’s brow smoothed when Adam kissed him there gently.

It was his turn to arrive to set first and they had a pact not to ever get there together unless some sponsor of the show wanted them to.

He took a deep breath and stood up, walking to the bathroom quickly buck naked as he was and getting in the shower as soon as the water was hot enough, not liking at all what he saw in the mirror the few seconds he stood in front of it.

There was no blood going down the drain but he was hurt enough to whimper in surprise and put his face briskly under the spray when washing his body only made him hyperaware of it.

 _This_ —giving in and letting Blake do whatever he wanted every time he was upset—needed to stop, he knew that, but talking with Blake when they were alone was a no-go. He’d just get mad and defensive and leave after accusing Adam of wanting to break up with him, which was so far from the truth it made him want to cry hysterically because yeah, he should want that, he really should.

After two nasty, grueling divorces the gentle side of Blake had shriveled and hid somewhere deep inside of him, and his possessiveness was getting really out of control but Adam still refused to give up on them.

He hoped this was just the rocky start of a long, happy relationship.

He hoped he could get Blake to be himself again, to be the loving and funny and goofy country son of a bitch he’d fallen in love with.

If this was it, if this was all Blake had to give for real, then—fuck, then they wouldn’t make it very far.

His heart clenched, fluttering in fear at the possibility.

He had to start singing a Bob Marley song to quell the almost overwhelming urge to fall on his knees and weep.

***

He was in makeup when Blake arrived, eyes closed as the artist worked on him.

The country singer gave him a tight, slightly too-long one-armed hug and kissed his temple, his blue eyes clear and jolly for everyone who didn’t know him well enough to see how closed-off he really was.

The butterflies died a little bit when they had to chat as if they hadn’t seen each other but Adam decided to count his blessings and smiled at his lover, very pointedly ignoring the eyelashes the women around them were batting at him.

Some flirted with Blake too but it was impossible to get jealous about it when every attempt flew right over the man’s head, his attention focused solely on Adam.

He was sure his lover didn’t even notice which was a pity, really, his self-esteem could do with the boost.

***

They had one relatively peaceful day before yet another ugly one.

He still talked and texted with Behati when they weren’t super busy and it only took Blake looking over his shoulder for a second for his mood to go south so fast Adam almost physically got whiplash, happy and hopeful after his boyfriend had tolerated the innuendos and flirty looks thrown his way with hardly any trouble, appeased with just a couple of kisses that Adam gave him willingly on the tip of his toes.

“You miss her, huh?” he spit out, face taunt with rage, “Tired of slumming with me already?”

He put his phone away obviously not fast enough, heart jumping to his throat and thumping fast because he already knew what was coming.

“I’m not slumming, don’t be an idiot,“ he sighed, rubbed his face with a hand, “Bee and I, we’re just friends now, like you and—“

“Don’t,” Blake cut him off, nasty, “My ex-wife isn’t a Victoria’s Secret model, Adam. It’s not the same.”

“It fucking is!” he insisted, breath hitching as his tall lover trapped him against the fridge, “Are you seriously freaking out because of a text? What are we, fifteen now?”

Blake ignored him, gripping his arms when Adam tried to sneak under his arm and go someplace else where the country singer couldn’t get to him so easily.

It took his lover twice as long as usual but he got Adam to spread his legs for him after kissing him hungrily for long minutes, tossing him over the kitchen counter to grip his thighs and get him just at the level to fuck right into him.

He was still sore but he arched and moaned, holding onto the country star’s sides, and let Blake lick and suck the skin on his neck until it was red and tender in the only kind of mark that would fade over night.

Adam was kind of glad they’d spend most of the time they had together having sex until they passed out; it meant he wouldn’t have time to think about anything, that the tough choice he had ahead of him could wait for a few hours.

He knew what he had to do but it didn’t mean it was easy.

***

Adam locked himself in his trailer the second they had a break, barely breathing through the pain of having to let go of Blake because they would never work, not if he refused to see how much his previous relationships had scarred him.

He didn’t want to give up on them, he’d hate himself for fucking _ever_ for doing it, but this—everything they did lately, it felt so toxic Adam didn’t even feel like himself anymore. Walking on eggshells twenty-four/seven was changing him and he didn’t like this trepidation that had him scared most of the time, scared about things he couldn’t control not even if he wanted to.

He had to tiptoe to Pharrell’s trailer and hide behind the door when Blake knocked looking for him, trusting his friend wouldn’t ask too many questions about Adam hiding from a very demanding, very loud Blake Shelton looking for him all over the studio.

“He left,” Pharrell announced after peeking through the blinds.

Adam wasn’t expecting to fall on his ass in sheer relief, but that was exactly what he did, laughing hysterically on the verge of one of the biggest break downs of his life when Pharrell hurried to kneel by his side and gripped his shoulder as if he feared Adam would pass out any second if he didn’t.

“Thanks, man,” he hitched, looking at the ceiling as he tried with everything he had in him to get a fucking grip and stop freaking his friend out, “I’ll—I’ll leave, just give me a sec.”

The producer had lied straight to Blake’s face with the best poker face Adam had ever seen on him. He kinda wished Pharrell would’ve kept that expression instead of the concerned frown he was sporting now, his dark eyes intent as they studied Adam’s face.

“I can’t be with him anymore,” he found himself admitting, his voice breaking because he wasn’t fucking supposed to say anything, “I don’t know what I’m going to do now.”

“Tell you what,” Pharrell offered gently, sitting right next to him to give him a hug and let Adam rest his swimming head on his shoulder, “You take it one step at a time. What can you do tonight to make things easier for you?”

Adam blinked, hiccupping a lot less with how soothing Pharrell’s voice was and how simple he’d made the next step sound even though it felt like the end of the world as he knew it for him.

He called James and asked him if he could crash at his place for a couple of days. He had the feeling Blake would eventually figure out Pharrell had helped him so staying with him wasn’t really an option, not unless he wanted to give his friend and coworker a front row seat of the fucking wreck that was his love life.

He went there with just the clothes on his back and his phone in his pocket, picking up on the way there when Blake called him for the third time.

“Where the hell are you, you little _whore_!?” Blake hissed, fuming and threatening in a way that made Adam flinch even more than hearing that slur from him for the first time ever.

The name calling only proved that he was taking the right decision.

Sadly for him, that he was in love didn’t mean things with Blake would work out.

“I’m done,” he said, setting his jaw so it’d stop trembling. His tone wasn’t steady but it was close enough that it shut Blake right up, his sharp voice coming from the blue tooth of the car stopping right away, “I really wanted to be with you, Blake, but you—I don’t even know who you are anymore.”

“Adam—“

“No, listen to me,” he interrupted, “There’s always going to be people who want in my pants and you can’t—you can’t just take that out on me every night. You’ve hurt me enough. I’m done.”

“Are we really doing this through the phone? Why can’t you tell me this to my face, Adam?” Blake asked, manipulative enough to make him hit the steering wheel and take a harsh turn in the next exit he needed on the highway.

“You fucking know why I can’t, asshole,” he replied, snappy, “Or did you forget about last night already? Or the night before that, or the night before that?“

“I didn’t hurt you, you fucking _pussy_ ,” Blake bit out, “You _liked_ it.”

“I want more than angry sex with you, Shelton,” he said, wanting to sound cool and collected but knowing the tears streaming down his face were obvious even through the phone, “If that’s all you want, you can get it somewhere else.”

There was a beat in which Adam swore his heart stopped and then Blake made this heart-wrenching, horrible noise in the back of his throat.

Was he crying too?

Was that even possible?

Adam had been so sure his heart had been too deep underground for that.

“You can’t break up with me,” Blake whispered, “You promised you didn’t want to.”

“I don’t want to!” he screamed, pushing the brakes just in time to avoid running a red light, “But you’re breaking my heart and I don’t know what else to do!”

“So you’re giving up on me!?” Blake shouted right back, “And here I was thinking you’d be different!”

“I’m not giving up on you,” he made clear, his voice so soft it shut Blake up better than any shouting match could do, “I’ll be here for you, I’ll be _waiting_ for you, but I won’t go back to be with the jealous pompous ass you’ve become.”

“Maybe that’s all I am now,” Blake answered darkly, “Maybe this is who I really am.”

“Maybe,” he conceded, “That’s up to you.”

 _I’ll always miss the old you_ , Adam thought as he finally parked at James’ place, tripping out of his car and almost falling on his knees if it weren’t for his friend’s swift catch.

He spent the night wide awake, half of him wishing Blake would find him and the other half dreading it, the ache in his body enough of a reminder of what could happen if he did.

“You look like shit,” James told him in the morning, moving around the kitchen to make breakfast for the both of them.

“I look better than I feel then,” he replied weakly, rubbing the corner of his eye as he checked his phone for the umpteenth time.

He had yet another voicemail from Blake.

He doubted this one would be full of apologies and promises like he’d been hoping so stupidly.

He was going to listen to it anyway, cringing through insults he knew he didn’t deserve but that stung all the same.

“Adam, what the fuck?” James asked, doing a double take as he turned to stare at him again.

Adam looked down at his body, wincing when he realized he’d forgotten to put his t-shirt back on and his skin covered in fresh and old bruises was on display; from the finger-shaped ones on his hips to the darker, bigger ones from when he’d hit the furniture or the wall depending on where exactly Blake had decided to fuck him.

He was such a fucking idiot.

“It looks worse than it really is,” he appeased, raising his hands in what he hoped was a ‘please, chill’ gesture, “Really, I’m fine.”

“He hit you!? Seriously!?” James yelled and Adam hid his face behind his palms, knowing his friend wasn’t even listening to him, “I’m going to fucking kill him!”

“Calm down, it’s nothing like that!” he tried to tell the blond, hurrying to grip his forearms when James turned off the stove and strolled briskly to the living room to pick up his car keys, “James, please! Things just got a little rough and I broke it off. I got it covered, okay?”

“A little rough?” the guitarist looked at him like he’d grown three heads and neither had much of a brain, “Are you kidding me?”

“Please, just let it go,” he pleaded, even though he knew in a couple of hours his closest friends would get a skewed idea of what had ruined things between him and Blake, “He didn’t hit me, I swear, and I broke up with him, alright? It’s over.”

“You did?” James asked, stunned, dropping his keys to lead Adam to the couch and sit him down instead, crouching in front of him with so much concern in his eyes he had to swallow and look away, “But Adam, you love the guy.”

He nodded, smiling sadly as he thought about the irony of everyone who knew him knowing exactly how much he adored Blake while the stupid asshole panicked and refused to see the truth, thinking Adam could ditch him any moment for someone else.

“I do,” he said at length, breath hitching as he finally felt the weight of what he’d done and broke down, “I do but he was—he was hurting me.”

James shushed him gently, sitting beside him to hug him and give him a shoulder to cry on.

This wasn’t even the first awful break-up James helped him through but he swore he’d never felt this raw and hopeless.

He wanted to be with Blake and Blake wanted to be with him, why couldn’t it just fucking _work_?

“It’s going to be okay, Adam,” his friend comforted him, his hands mindful of the bruises on his back, “We’ll get you through this, we always do.”

***

He barely made it on time to be on set, red-rimmed and puffy eyes and pale skin making the makeup department fuss over him long enough that he almost made them be behind schedule even before starting the day but no one, not even Alan, berated him for it.

Pharrell stood between him and Blake whenever the country singer tried to walk up to him, Gwen quickly backing him up once she seemed to realize what was going on.

Adam just tried to concentrate on the job and pretended he didn’t want to cry himself stupid every time he as much as listened to Blake’s voice just a few feet away from him.

Blake caught him alone backstage during a break but Adam held his ground, knowing his ex wouldn’t do a thing with the staff around them.

“Adam, can we—can we talk?“ he stammered, his twang as endearing as ever.

Adam fucking hated himself for still loving it.

“We’re talking,” he pointed out in a tone that he hoped conveyed he wasn’t going anywhere alone with Blake.

“Fair enough,” the country singer accepted mildly, cocking his head to the red couches they sometimes hung out on, “Can we sit then? I’ll be quick.”

Adam agreed, feeling eyes on them and not sure whether he liked the fact they were being watched—by Carson probably, the guy was like a hawk when it came to see trouble on set—or if he hated it.

He squirmed a little, regretting he’d picked a t-shirt instead of a sweater for this season’s knock-outs. He needed something to fidget with, to hide his hands in.

“If I—If I prove myself to you, will you take me back?” Blake asked him, straight to the point, taking one of his hands in his two huge, warm ones, “If you start seeing somebody else I don’t know what I’m gonna—“

“Blake,” Adam cut in with a sigh, “I told you I’d wait for you. I meant that. You need to trust me or we’re not going to work, ever, you get that?”

Blake stared at him in a mix of surprise and confusion that would’ve made Adam laugh in any other situation. In that moment, it only caused his heart to flutter as he stopped himself from reaching out and soothe the man he loved more than anything.

“So you just want—what, a break?”

“I want you to get your shit together,” he stated, pulling his hand out of Blake’s grip and standing up, “That’s it.”

He felt ruthless for leaving Blake like that, pinching the bridge of his nose as he sat on a big red couch all by himself, but he knew that if he stayed and tried to be just a comforting friend he’d end up giving in again and spending the night moaning under the taller man only to be yelled at for whatever reason the following day.

He wondered for how long he could stay away from Blake.

He already missed him.

***

“Where the hell are you?” Blake asked him in a voice message, seething, “How am I supposed to know you’re not out screwing someone!?”

Adam sniffed, absent-mindedly plucking one of James’ guitars as his phone played his messages on speaker.

The blond wasn’t home yet and he felt very much like wallowing.

It was either that or running back to Blake’s stifling, greedy arms.

In the recording, Blake laughed derisively and kept going, “Hell, what am I saying? I bet you’re out _getting_ screwed by some random guy. You like taking it up the ass so much there’s no way you’re going without, you little slut.”

“Not your little slut anymore,” Adam said aloud, just to himself, tipping his chin up and forcing himself to feel proud about it, “dickhead.”

He looked up at the ceiling and let his mind go blank, his fingers moving fluidly through the notes he wanted to pull out of the instrument in his hands.

***

Blake stopped leaving angry messages two days after their break-up.

He stopped talking to Adam altogether too, unless there were cameras around and he absolutely had to.

He didn’t stop staring at Adam like he was a star he wanted to pluck from the sky but knew better than to try and that was enough to give Adam just a tiny sliver of hope to soothe the ache in his chest, to help him breathe through longing and guilt and misery all compressed into one horrible, ever-present weight right over his heart.

He went back home after a week.

He didn’t know which one hurt more; if the fact Blake wasn’t there and seemed to be long gone or the fact Blake didn’t come through the door to pull him into his arms and kiss him until it hurt.

***

Realizing how much he’d fucked up with Adam was like getting hit in the head by a wrecking ball.

He was just looking at him—something he couldn’t seem to stop himself from doing, no matter how much he tried—and he suddenly, finally saw it; the way the pop singer’s shoulders drooped and his gaze fell the instant the cameras stopped rolling, the never-ending and contagious energy Adam always had exuded nowhere to be found.

He smiled slightly and gave his team some quick advice that Blake couldn’t hear, going back to being a still, quiet guy the country star wasn’t familiar with at all, and went away quickly after they wrapped for the day instead of hanging out with Carson, Gwen, Pharrell and the band.

Several days went by, enough that even the righteous anger he felt entitled to at being dumped faded and was replaced by a whole lot of doubt and worry; he couldn’t find one good reason for Adam _not_ to ditch him after remembering how difficult of a partner he’d been from the start.

He wanted to go back in time, to get back the sweetness of their first kiss; the startled and shy brush of lips they had leaned in for when they were alone in Blake’s trailer that fateful day he’d dared to hope the soft glint in Adam’s eyes meant exactly what he wanted it to mean.

He wanted to go back in time and make Adam feel like they were together for good, wanted to show him there was much more than resentment in this tired heart of his even after two failed marriages and too many bottles of Patron.

He wanted more than anything to get another chance to make things right between them, to make love to Adam instead of fucking him like he was a dirty little secret that Blake hated to love, instead of taking him for granted every single time.

Adam had said he’d get it but Blake didn’t know if he deserved it, didn’t know if he could be any different from what he was now.

He guessed he wouldn’t know unless he tried.

***

Adam hadn’t changed the locks or alerted security to forbid Blake from coming into his house which in itself meant a lot.

It almost made him feel like the pretty, talented musician had been waiting for him to be back. As if to confirm it, he couldn’t find any trace of another person or even of Adam going out except to work.

He tried not to think about the last night he’d been romantic, picking a couple of candles to put on the table as he decided what to make for a dinner he could get automatically kicked out of if Adam had changed his mind about them.

***

He lighted the candles when he heard one of Adam’s cars parking outside, feeling ten kinds of awkward as he waited for the younger man to catch him standing beside what would hopefully be a nice meal.

Adam stopped to stare at him like a deer in the headlights, dropping his jacket and his keys and every single thing he had in his hands.

He cringed a little bit as Blake closed the distance between them and that hurt, he wasn’t going to deny it, but he reached slowly to cup his cheek instead of lashing out.

“I miss you,” he confessed, raspy, “All those things I said—I didn’t mean a single one of them.”

He felt Adam stiffening under his touch, breath all but catching in his chest as he looked right into Blake’s eyes.

“It sounded like you did,” the lead man contradicted, small, not leaning into his touch like Blake had been hoping he would but at least not pulling away.

He kneeled on the floor and kissed one of Adam’s hands, looking up with a plea in his face that he couldn’t put into words but that he hoped Adam could understand anyway.

“I didn’t, I promise,” he swore, going back to his feet when the smaller man tugged him up, making the most of it by pulling Adam to a close-mouthed kiss that still managed to rip a gasp out of him, “I’ll be good to you this time, you’ll see.”

He was half bluffing, half hoping he would but Adam still made do with it and finally relaxed against him, tipping his chin up and parting his lips so they could kiss slowly but deeply in exactly the way Blake had been craving.

He was sure that if he pulled his little lover up and got his pants down they’d be fucking in no time and it was hard to resist, to ignore the hard-on he had pressing uncomfortably against his zipper just thinking about it, but if there was something he needed to prove it was that he wasn’t just using Adam for sex. The days of being rough and inconsiderate had to stop or he could lose Adam for good.

They went to bed for the first time ever just to get some sleep, Adam tucked under his arm as Blake kissed his hair and stayed awake just a little while longer.

With the lead man breathing softly against his neck, he found it was easy to forget about the lingering ache in his chest, to stop listening at the nagging voice in his head asking him if he would ever be enough for someone to stay with him.

***

“You don’t really have to, you know,” Adam mumbled in the morning, looking down at his feet like a little kid when he caught Blake making pancakes for breakfast, “We’re good.”

Blake shook his head, letting go of the pan to pull Adam to his side and press his lips against his temple.

“Don’t go all shy on me now, honey,” he drawled, teasing, “Who doesn’t like a little pampering, huh?”

His lover studied him for a moment, looking up at him with a little frown on his gorgeous face that Blake wanted to kiss but refrained from doing it.

He wanted them to be great, not just good, and he hoped he was doing enough of a good job at it that Adam didn’t think he was just doing it because he had to.

“You’re such a stupid idiot,” Adam sighed at length.

The smile he was trying and failing to bite back told Blake otherwise.

***

He got away with a lot, he admitted it.

Even while trying to keep their relationship secret, he could put his hand on Adam’s knee—on his thigh too, if he felt like it—he could kiss his neck until he squirmed and gave Blake an annoyed look and everyone would think he was fooling around and that Adam wanted him to stop being weird.

He didn’t get away with enough that he could kiss Adam right on the mouth as they were waiting for their friends to go get some drinks but he did it anyway, trusting the studio was empty enough and not really caring about anything that wasn’t the feel of Adam’s soft, pliant lips against his as his hands scrambled to clutch Blake’s vest, a small surprised noise rushing out of his throat that Blake muffled by deepening the contact until Gwen smacked the back of his head to separate them.

“Ow!” he complained as Adam chuckled and rubbed the sore spot.

Blake blinked, the stares of their three friends more than enough for him to understand they weren’t quite happy with them being back so soon or probably back at all.

He grasped Adam’s waist just a little tighter to remember that he could, relaxing when the pop singer leaned into his touch and wriggled beside him to be just a little bit closer to him.

If he paid enough attention, and God knew that he was, these little touches felt more intimate and soothing than fucking Adam senseless ever had.

***

“Ah,” Adam panted, tossing his head back and spreading his legs for Blake to grip his thighs higher as he sucked the skin on his neck lightly, “Blake, just—“

“Shh,” he hushed, tightening his hold and making Adam shiver as he pressed him against the arm of the sofa and dared to leave a small love bite just to listen to the startled little noise Adam made, “We got all night, darling, let’s make the most of it.”

He stopped Adam’s protest—he was so impatient, especially when they were in bed—by groping him over his clothes first and then taking him out slowly, smearing the bit of pre-come on the tip with his thumb before clasping it in a firm grip and enjoy the way Adam jerked against him, closing his eyes as his hips moved to follow Blake’s hand.

He hadn’t touched him like this in what felt like ages and had never really done it for long enough, always in a rush to get them both off by driving right into the inviting heat between Adam’s pretty, pert cheeks, and his lover gaped at him when Blake manhandled him to sit on the arm of the sofa so his flushed cock could be right in front of his face if he leaned down enough.

“Oh my God, Blake, fuck,” Adam cursed, his hands letting go of Blake’s shoulders easily to card through his curls once Blake licked the head of his dick and took it right into his mouth to suck, “Your mouth, fuck, yeah.”

Blake smirked with his eyes, his lips stretched full around Adam’s length and angled his lover’s hips just a little closer to the edge so he could take his skinny jeans down enough to swipe a finger against his entrance and feel how Adam’s body was squeezing there around nothing, as if begging for something to fill him up already as he moaned loudly and had to use a hand to grip the sofa not to fall over.

Deep throating him was harder than he expected, Adam’s length not small by any sense of the word, but even gagging a little bit around him seemed to drive the front man crazy and had him murmuring a stream of curses mixed with praise as his hand kept Blake’s head buried between his legs.

Adam went meekly down to his lap after coming in his mouth with a loud groan, pushing himself up on wobbly knees to help Blake strip him from the waist down.

He turned around and pushed his ass up, clearly expecting Blake to fuck him right away, looking at him in confusion when he guided him to his lap again and put his legs around his middle so he could stand up with Adam half naked and sweaty against him to take him up the stairs as he kissed questions he’d rather answer without words right back into his mouth.

He laid Adam on the baby grand piano in his bedroom after flinging his t-shirt away, focusing on the way his chest seized and he kept gaping at him, seemingly speechless, before Blake started to kiss practically every inch of his body from the spot behind his ear to the bony, hot line of his hips.

He had to grip Adam’s wrists every now and then to stop him from rushing things and keep him splayed just like he wanted, lapping and kissing the smooth skin of one of his cheeks before licking persistently over his hole, pushing one of Adam’s legs over his shoulder and gripping his ankle tight when he jolted under him.

He had never paid this much attention to Adam’s body and it was a real pity that he hadn’t; it was like he was feeling him for the first time, discovering and claiming every inch of him all at once, and it was almost appalling that he’d taken this long to memorize and understand just how perfect Adam was.

“Want me to fuck you right here?” he asked huskily, blowing a bit of damp, warm breath over Adam’s entrance before getting to his feet to finally unzip his own jeans.

He was so hard he had to grip himself tight to stop himself from coming just at the sight of Adam sprawled over the piano with his thighs spread for him, his crack shiny with the spit Blake had been diligently putting there.

“Uh-huh,” Adam replied, a bit incoherent and eager to have him inside if the way his hips raised as if in search of his cock was anything to go by, “Please, baby.”

Blake smiled, toeing off his boots and taking his pants off as he walked to the nightstand and rummaged through it to get his hands on the bottle of lube he knew Adam kept there even though they didn’t exactly make a habit of using it, not unless Blake was in a good enough of a mood to remember to do it.

He put the bottle on the piano right next to Adam as he started to press cold, slick fingers into him, opening him up as Adam panted and thrashed, his chest heaving as his cock jerked and smeared strips of pre-come on his belly.

Blake smiled, satisfied, quite aware he’d never made Adam leak or writhe this much.

The gasp Adam made as he took Blake in made him shiver from head to toe, the smooth heat clenching around him in a way that made him swear they’d been made to fit together like this.

He selfishly hoped the sweat they were both coating the sleek surface of the piano with would stay there for days so they’d have a reminder of them making love on it at a rhythm worthy of a romance novel, stretching their coupling until neither of them could take it anymore and they had no choice but to chase their release frantically, Blake gripping Adam’s hips tightly to slam right into him and Adam’s legs wrapped firmly around his middle, their groans and moans and the filthy sounds of their skin slapping together the best kind of music to Blake’s ears.

Adam came with a wail without a hand on him, letting Blake put one of his legs over his shoulder and looking dazedly up at him with his arms lying beside his head as Blake thrust into him fast and hard, grunting in sweet frustration when his orgasm kept eluding him because this was good, this was so wonderful he’d happily stay on the verge of coming forever if he could.

“C’mon, babe,” Adam encouraged him, clumsily getting up on his elbows to reach Blake’s nape with a hand, his shin pushing Blake’s back down, “Let go.”

And he did; vision going bright and white with just how intense it was, spilling into Adam’s hole so much he swore there wasn’t a single drop left in him and collapsing on top of him without meaning to but glad that he did when his lithe lover found his lips and licked right into his mouth.

He knew treating Adam like he deserved would never be hard to remember, not when he’d have the younger man looking at him in awe with enough affection in his hazel eyes that Blake felt like the biggest idiot in the world for ever doubting that he had Adam’s heart to keep if he just manned up enough to do things right for him.

He caressed the thigh Adam still had around him, rolling him down to push him against the piano and look at him tenderly for a long moment.

They stumbled to bed right afterwards, spending the night tangled in one another in what had to be the best kind of love confession Blake had ever given and gotten.


	16. in public place

In the top ten of the most stupid things Adam had done in his life, this one probably ranked pretty high.

He still let Blake pull his clothes down just enough to expose his ass and canted his hips so he could slide right in after unzipping his jeans, breaching Adam’s stretched and lubed entrance as if they were alone in the privacy of one of their homes instead of in the corner of a dark, snobby club in L.A.

Adam’s breath hitched and he squirmed a little in Blake’s lap, his hands holding onto the edges of the table of their booth as his mouth dropped open and he gasped, swallowing as many moans as he could even though this was the hottest thing he’d ever done with anybody ever and he wasn’t a prude by any sense of the word.

Blake just fit so good inside him, hitting the right spot without even trying and fucking Adam with barely a roll of his hips, trusting him to make it every bit as erotic as slamming into him with deep thrusts was while they didn’t need to fucking _hide under a table_ by grinding right back onto his dick, hips going back and forth and up and down all at the same time in a way that had Blake growling low in his throat right against his ear and going faster, his hand scrambling to jerk Adam off to get him off fast before someone could catch them having sex there.

“I want to kiss you,” he whined, upper body curling forward even though all he wanted was to lie back on Blake’s warm and broad chest and get fucked as desperately as he needed it, “Fuck, you feel so good inside me.”

He was practically vibrating with pleasure and he knew that Blake could feel it; they’d barely been at it for a couple of minutes and Adam was already clenching and unclenching around him like his life depended on it, hips moving smoothly into Blake’s fist and onto his dick that made him feel so full and hot inside he didn’t care about anything that wasn’t his lover pushing into him and breathing right against his nape.

“So tight, sweetheart,” Blake breathed in his ear, his voice rough as his hips picked up enough speed to make Adam’s eyes roll back in his head, “Hugging me just right, that’s it. I’m gonna kiss you stupid after coming inside this tight little hole of yours.”

Blake’s finger brushed his frenulum and Adam couldn’t help the loud moan that ripped from him, not that the music let anyone hear it except for the man that had caused it.

At least, that was what he hoped.

He just didn’t give enough of a damn to stop.

Adam was so fucking glad they’d fucked their brains out before getting ready to go out with their friends, so fucking glad Blake had proved to be the kinkiest motherfucker and fingered him hurriedly before pressing the head of his dick right against his entrance the instant they were alone.

Shit, if Pharrell and Carson came back with their drinks there was no way they wouldn’t know what exactly they were up to, never mind how low-key they were trying to keep it.

And that just made Adam hotter; he could bet it was the same for Blake, who seemed encouraged instead of terrified whenever people walked close to their little booth of sin.

“Hurry the fuck up,” he demanded, sweaty, moving faster as he tossed his head back and bit back a loud moan when the hard length inside him pressed right where he needed it.

“Bossy,” Blake teased, mouth closing around Adam’s earlobe and wow, they weren’t even trying to pretend they weren’t doing it anymore, not really, “But so needy, aren’t you, hun?”

His lover’s accent just added more heat to the burning, delicious feeling in his belly and it didn’t take him more than a few seconds to shot his load under the table as Blake’s hand gripped him tight, squeaking under his breath when he felt Blake’s hot seed going deep into him too.

His weight down there was something he missed when Blake pulled out to fix their clothes, which he did right before their co-workers came back to their booth.

Adam turned to grin at him, still perched on the country singer’s thighs, ducking his head and giggling behind his hands when Blake all but leered at him and looked so very pleased with himself Adam felt like kissing him but also like smacking him in the head.


	17. on the floor

Blake kissed him good morning right on the mouth, waking him up in the warmest, sexiest way Adam knew; pressing right to his lips just how much he’d missed Adam and how much he was dying for their skin to be sliding against the other until nothing but the places where they were joined existed for them.

He’d crawled under the covers after sneaking home from LAX, the last leg of their tour surprisingly over around the same time Blake was done with his own gigs, so tired everything he wanted was to cuddle with his boyfriend and try to get some sleep even though a tiny, paranoid voice in his head told him he was supposed to be making up for lost time with his lover while he could, not passing out because he was exhausted.

He kissed Blake right back, using his tongue and lips to let the man know this thing between them was—and would be, for a long time, probably, no matter how scary that was—still what Adam craved the most, hand curling on the older man’s nape as they licked and sucked each other’s mouths just how they both liked it; long and playful and dirty enough to make their toes curl and have their cocks eager for any kind of action they could get.

They undressed slowly, Blake’s hands outlining every angle of his body as if he was afraid he’d forgotten just how slim and toned Adam was, groping his ass almost hard enough to sting to prompt Adam to let his body loose and willing for him.

He went down with a shocked but pleased moan when Blake rolled the tangle of limbs they were right onto the floor, pressing down between Adam’s spread legs with his thigh to rub teasingly against him, hips grinding to get some friction for himself on Adam’s own thigh too.

He almost hit his head against the nightstand as Blake’s hips insisted in snapping back and forth as if they were fucking already, smearing his ass with pre-come and lube but not quite hitting the mark.

His breath hitched, hips going up in their own accord to help Blake slide into him and getting two fingers right up his hole for his trouble.

He wanted to complain because it wasn’t what he wanted but stayed under Blake as his lover pushed him down and kept one of Adam’s legs up and against his chest, going deep as he rubbed his rim so assuredly Adam could only lie back and stutter short moans as he craned his neck to stare at the promising, stiff length against Blake’s belly once their breaths ran out.

Blake seemed to be piercing him with his eyes, so intent in making both of them a fucking mess but so very tender at the same time it just wasn't fair.

It was so unnerving but so very refreshing, how Blake made him feel like they were making love instead of just fucking no matter how downright filthy what they were doing was.

As if to prove his point, Blake chose that moment to nuzzle his nose and give him a series of open-mouthed, brief kisses that left Adam arching and whining for more.

He gripped the back of Blake’s thigh with a hand, pushing up to reverse their places without letting go of him to grab at Blake’s long dick himself and guide him into his entrance as he crouched on Blake’s groin.

None of them could do anything but enjoy how Adam’s body little by little gave way to the thickness that wanted in.

He shivered when it finally fit, grinding his hips to start them on a rhythm that lasted for the minute it took Blake to roll them over again so Adam was back beneath him and his head was pressing right against one of the legs of the bedside table.

Not that he was planning on protesting, not with Blake finally fucking right into him and bending to catch his lips in a heated kiss again.

He could feel his own cock bouncing against his belly but kept holding on to Blake’s skin, tugging at his hair and digging his fingers into his thigh.

He crossed his ankles just above the small of Blake’s back, closing his eyes to enjoy the almost gentle slide of Blake’s length inside him and stroking Blake’s leg as his other hand brushed his lover’s cheek.

Their bodies moved in a synchronized flow, the peak of their pleasure practically slapping them both in the face when it felt like they were just beginning to get to know each other again in the way that Adam was the fondest of.

“Welcome home,” Blake breathed against his skin, wet lips tracing Adam’s cheekbone and hands slipping from Adam's butt to his legs, subtly bending him more as if he couldn't resist testing just how lithe the front man was, “How’s that for hello, ex Sexiest Man Alive?”

Adam smiled but snorted, opening his eyes to look at Blake like he was the dumbest but most charming motherfucker on the face of the Earth.

Which he kind of was.

“Eh, it was fine,” he teased, giggling when Blake’s brow furrowed and his plush lips curled in a pout, “You’re such a dumb idiot, just come here.”

They hadn’t quite made it to pet names yet but it didn’t matter; their bodies moving together was all the message Adam needed to feel confident of the love they had for each other.

He guided Blake back to his mouth and got lost in that warmth he loved so much.


	18. morning lazy sex

Warm sunshine wakes Blake up, makes him wrinkle his nose and try and avoid getting up just yet by burrowing into the even warmer skin on Adam’s shoulder blade.

The smaller man barely stirs in his arms, the light starting to hit him in the face seemingly not affecting him much, and Blake tells himself he should probably let Adam catch some shuteye instead of waking him up at first light just because he’s itching to talk and touch him—and alright, he admits it, not necessarily in that order.

Maroon 5’s worldwide tours always make him lonely and just a tad scared of losing what has taken him years to get ahold of; if distance makes Adam’s heart slip between his fingers, he swears to God he won’t let go of it without a fight, will try to get it back with everything he has.

It doesn’t look like he needs to worry about that happening this time though, with Adam running to greet him as soon as he got out of their private plane and making the most of the fact only his bandmates were around them to kiss Blake hello in a way that had Blake’s hands clutching his slender waist and pushing the lead singer closer to him.

The pleased little noise that made it out of Adam’s mouth then had soothed Blake’s heart enough for him to enjoy the ride home quietly nuzzling into his boyfriend’s neck, his hand curled around Adam’s hip as the pop singer straddled his thigh and chatted cheerfully with his friends while enjoying the sight of the city he loved so much during night.

He’s so in love his chest hurts a little bit even in good moments like these, when his fingertips are brushing Adam’s ribs and ripping a sigh out of him as his back arches unconsciously in his sleep, his lips outlining the elegant curve of his neck and shoulder with his eyes closed just so he can memorize it better.

He reaches between Adam’s legs with his other hand, gently squeezing him through the thin cotton of his boxers and smiling when a sleepy moan follows the instinctive roll of his lover’s hips.

He gets rid of their underwear while leaving small lovebites on Adam’s neck, using both hands to grip his thighs apart as he pushes his lover up right on top of him for their cocks to touch at the same time Adam’s back gets plastered against his chest, his head lolling on Blake’s shoulder, and that’s what finally wakes the pop singer up.

“Oh fuck, Blake, yes,” he pants, fingers scrambling to jerk them both off sloppily.

Blake chuckles, low and deep in his chest, whispers, “Morning to you too, honey,” right in Adam’s ear as his lover moans eagerly and picks up the pace.

He pushes Adam up to get him under him again with barely any trouble, half-hearted breathy complaints leaving his boyfriend’s mouth as the country singer kisses his way down his back, fingers testing just how tight Adam is after weeks of being apart.

He shuts Adam up by making him lick two of his fingers, his other hand scarcely closing around the bottle of lube and completely forgoing the box of condoms they always keep in hand for times like these.

Adam releases his fingers with a wet, obscene pop and pushes his ass off the bed, knees skidding on the sheets to make Blake’s job of prepping him easier as he peeps at him over his shoulder, mouth hanging open as his body seems to swallow two of Blake’s fingers right up.

“Adam, can I—“ he pants, voice hoarse, body already moving almost on its own accord to cover Adam’s smaller one, the head of his cock pressing in warily in case the answer is no.

Adam groans in reply, one of the arms supporting his weight reaching behind to push Blake’s ass and get him in deeper and that’s when Blake downright loses it—feeling Adam’s smooth, tight heat around him for the first time with no latex between them.

He snaps his hips in slowly but deeply, cursing right along with Adam as he forces them both up the mattress until his lover finds the headboard to hold on to and move back to meet his cock, the filthy back and forth of their hips the only thing they have to focus on as Blake leans his forehead on Adam’s nape and spreads long fingers on Adam’s hipbones to get him right where they both want.

Their share a slow, almost maddening rhythm that seems to grow with the light coming from the window, the steady stream of moans and stuttered ‘ah’s that Adam utters against his forearm telling him it’s just what they both need and that rushing it would only ruin it, the almost gentle slide and touch of warm sweaty skin pretty much the best thing there is right then for them.

His hands slide to the rippling muscles on his lover’s belly, caressing them before gripping the point where thigh meets groin as his other hand closes around Adam’s cock to get him off when his own hips lose tempo and get frantic as he gets closer to the edge. That’s all it takes for the lead man to shiver under him and spill on the sheets, cock jerking and softening slowly in Blake’s grip.

Adam surprises him by keeping him right inside of him with a hand clasping his ass firmly as he comes in shallow, quick thrusts, the tip barely making it in so he can fill Adam up.

He’s breathless like he hasn’t been in ages and a little bit nervous, waiting for Adam to react to what they just did and discovering with a smile that there’s nothing for him to worry; Adam hums, pleased in that way he only sounds after mind-blowing sex, and angles his hips shamelessly so the country star can look at his own come leaking out of him when he pulls out.

“I liked it,” he admits, breath hitching and eyelids fluttering prettily just how Blake loves when he uses his fingertips to press right on his rim to keep their mess in, “A-A lot.”

“Gosh, me too,” he breathes on Adam’s skin, peppering his nape and the side of his neck with kisses as he desperately tries to get himself hard again, fondling his cock roughly for minutes that are far too long for his liking, until he’s about halfway there and can thrust right into his lover again, "So goddamn much, you have no idea."

Adam keens, clenching down on him as his hands lose the hold of the headboard and he goes down to thrash under Blake’s bigger frame, moving up and down right along with him when he’s hard enough for them to make love again.


	19. outdoors

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *squints* i think i overdid this one.

Their hunting trip hadn’t exactly started on the right foot; they’d been arguing on and off for weeks, probably because they hadn’t been able to see each other for about as long, and Adam had grudgingly hoped on Blake’s truck to go to the woods like they’d planned back when things were good between them.

He wanted to fix whatever it was going on between them but he was no miracle worker and with Adam huffing and looking stubbornly out of the window the whole time, there was no way for him to smooth their rough edges and figure out what the hell he’d done wrong, if he had done anything at all.

“I always visit you on L.A. without throwing a tantrum about it, y’know,” Blake remarked bitterly, looking at the pop singer’s profile for a second and catching how Adam’s jaw clenched at his words, “It’d be real nice for you to do the same for me for once.”

“Yeah, you’re oh so giving,” Adam spit out, crossing his arms even harder as he huddled in on himself, “I’m the ass who doesn’t treat you right, my bad.”

He stepped on the gas and hit the wheel harshly enough to make his boyfriend jump.

“Goddamn it, Adam, if this is you taking pity on me before dumping me—“ he took a long, shuddering breath, voice cracking as he talked with a lump big enough to be his own heart beating in his throat, “I’d rather take you back and be done with it.”

He got no reply for a couple of miles that he spent glimpsing at Adam through the rearview mirror, brow furrowing in concern when he caught sight of the tears making it past his shiny sunglasses and down his cheeks, so fast and thick Adam couldn’t hide them from him.

“Darling?” he called gently, wishing they were already in the middle of nowhere so he could stomp on the brakes and pull Adam into his arms to soothe him, “Please, talk to me.”

Adam shook his head, hiding under the hoodie he’d chosen to wear for their little escapade, “Just keep driving.”

Blake did, biting his tongue whenever Adam wiped his face with the back of his hand, still refusing to look at him.

***

Reaching the woods wasn’t as satisfactory as Blake had imagined but he ignored the pang in his chest and the fear in his belly and got himself busy making camp.

They had only like half an hour of light to get it ready, otherwise he’d be hugging Adam and demanding to know what had been bothering him all this time.

Adam let Blake build their tent and arrange everything the way he liked it, trailing behind quietly to set their things and make himself useful even though he was every bit the city boy Blake liked to make fun of.

The fire was ready just in time for them not to get left in the dark, the sun hiding quickly down the horizon to let the stars shine in its place.

Blake was just about to reach out to Adam when the little guy beat him to it; his hands a bit cold but soft and rough in the exact places Blake remembered—familiar and missed in more ways that Blake could explain—as they cupped the country singer’s cheeks at the same time Adam straddled his thighs and sighed brokenly as Blake enveloped his waist to get him closer, cradling him in his lap just where he belonged.

“I know I can’t ask more from you,” Adam said, so quiet and sad Blake’s chest seized with something that was just this short of being a sob, “But this—this isn’t enough for me anymore, Blake, being alone for too long fucking wrecks me and you can’t—you can’t come with me anywhere, not without—“

“Shhh,” he knew where this was going, knew it because he’d been dreading this exact moment since the first time they kissed, “You can. You have every right, Adam.”

He surprised himself by not letting the consequences awaiting in his future freeze him and smooched Adam’s hair as his partner burrowed into his shoulder with eyes squeezed so tight it was obvious he wasn’t expecting them to still be together when he opened them.

They’d been together for a little over four months; the first two had been as magical as Blake was expecting things between them to be and then the show had gone into hiatus and they both had been too busy with their careers and only managed to turn every conversation into accusations and petty fights that started over nothing.

And he'd been refusing even for their families and friends to know about them, too scared of their secret making it out to truly enjoy what they had.

“I’ll visit more often if you do too and I won't force you to hide from people you care about, I promise,” he offered, earnest, “We can still figure this out.”

“I can’t let you do that,” the lead man said, eyes wide with so much hope Blake could still catch it in the semidarkness, crackling along with the fire beside them.

“You can’t _make_ me,” Blake countered, nuzzling Adam’s face before pressing a kiss to one high cheekbone, “Let me try to be enough, Adam, I know I can be.”

Adam laughed, a teary little thing in the quiet of the night and guided Blake’s head to a lingering kiss as his fingers slipped through his curls.

“You are, I just, I miss you too much,” he amended and Blake tried not to remember how often Behati had tagged along with Adam wherever he went and how much attention she’d given the pop singer, “So fucking much.”

He was in no position to give Adam even half of that but he still dared to dream it’d be enough in the end.

They roasted marshmallows to eat after Adam made faces at the pasta Blake had prepared over the fire, being as picky as Blake had expected him to be but cheering up with dessert just like a little kid would.

He made sure to put all the food away before putting out the fire and pulling a still restless Adam inside their tent.

“Can’t we go for a walk?” Adam asked, slightly tense between Blake’s arms, “I’m not sleepy.”

“We’ll explore tomorrow,” he didn’t want to point out how dangerous hiking in the dark on unfamiliar territory was.

Apparently his lover hadn’t paid much attention to the rifle Blake had left right outside in case things turned ugly despite the precautions not to lure any animals near them he’d taken.

Adam did stop asking if they could go out after hearing a pack of wolves howling not very far.

“It’s like ten,” Adam murmured against his neck, “Who sleeps at ten, man?”

“Lots of people,” Blake replied, giving his lover a long goodnight kiss that had him sighing and snuggling closer, parting his lips and legs to let Blake in in a way that made him shiver and forget all about how tired and drained he’d been feeling up ‘til then.

“I can’t see you,” Adam protested, making him reach for the lamp he’d just turned off a few minutes ago.

He’d brought batteries to last a lifetime; he could indulge them in this.

Adam smiled at him, licking back inside his mouth as Blake guided him on top of him, spreading his hands on the younger man’s buttocks, for once thankful his boyfriend hadn’t listened to him and went to bed almost naked.

“I missed you,” Adam confessed as he opened Blake’s flannel to lick and shower his chest with tiny kisses.

“Me too, sweetheart,” he drawled, hands stroking Adam’s back as he twisted to get rid of his boxers and wasted no time in taking Blake out of his jeans, “I hate fighting with you, breaks my heart.”

“Sorry,” Adam whispered, hiding against his neck as they ground together and he poured lube over Blake’s fingers.

He didn’t know whether the front man was saying he was sorry for all the times he’d started their fights, for needing more than it was safe for Blake to give or simply for not letting Blake make love to him slowly.

Either way, he had nothing to apologize for; Blake loved this, loved him enough for the bitter times to be something he was willing to put up with for him.

He still took his sweet time in prepping him, pulling his fingers in and out of Adam until they were both aching for more, wanting them to forget all the harsh words they’d said to each other when everything they wanted was to be together.

Adam cried out, surprised and delighted, when Blake finally let him ride him, undulating his hips just so to make Blake slide in and almost all the way out while they kissed messily.

“Oh god, baby, there—“ he moaned, hand reaching behind him as he straightened to feel Blake’s cock going in, his hips picking up speed as Adam bounced on his cock and took him right in, skin glistening with sweat. He gripped Blake’s thighs hard, tossing his head back, and tried to get him in impossibly deeper, “Please, _fuck_ , faster, faster—more, _ohh—_ Blake!“

He didn’t need to beg, not that Blake was going to complain; having Adam like this was one of the most intoxicating things he’d ever experienced.

Sometimes he thought, knew it right down to his core, that stopping wasn’t an option, that he was never ever going to let Adam go no matter what.

***

They shared a bowl of oatmeal in the morning and he could tell Adam was sore by the way he moved slowly, wincing whenever he tried to sit for too long.

He could also tell Adam didn’t give a damn about it; he hadn’t even bothered to get properly dressed and just put on the plaid shirt Blake had worn yesterday like a short dress, teasing Blake since the second he’d opened his eyes to get him to fuck him again which he did right after breakfast, the sun rising lazily behind him as he pulled Adam’s legs up and bent his nimble lover in two to slam home, fast and hard and relentless just like Adam was asking him to.

Adam moaned loudly, arching under him and gripping his own calves to keep himself open for him, not even registering the rough ground under the rug Blake had thrown outside their tent not exactly for this purpose.

He was probably going to get sunburn for this but he couldn’t bring himself to care either, not with Adam making such pretty, needy noises for him and clenching around him so good he couldn't even think of stopping.

His hips snapped faster as he brought Adam’s legs higher and his lover stretched them, whimpering and wailing when Blake let go of his thighs to press down on his chest and groan loudly, Adam’s entrance tight and slick and perfect for him to lose himself into.

He gripped Adam’s thighs when he felt like he was close, pushing them open almost at 180 to make his desperate, clingy lover really feel him.

Adam screamed as he panted and thrust into him over and over, the wet sound of their fucking the loudest thing in the quiet around them.

His lover’s voice wavered with the force of their coupling, eyelids fluttering as his hands reached up to shakily grip Blake’s arms and thighs in weak attempts to keep him close since all he could do was focus on just how good Blake was giving it to him.

It was the prettiest thing Blake had ever seen, having Adam like this in the wild.

***

“Jesus, Adam,” he swore, shocked but so freaking grateful and thrilled they got to do this again he let go of his shotgun right away when Adam sneaked under him as they were crouching behind a bush in the middle of hunting a deer and pressed his pert little ass right against him, getting him half-hard in about a minute, “Right here?”

“Uh-huh,” Adam answered, voice husky as he touched himself and pushed back against Blake’s groin harder, “C’mon, Big Country, I know you want it too.”

“Fuck yeah,” he admitted, eager and clumsy fingers unzipping his jeans as Adam pushed his own pants down to his thighs.

He didn’t need any other invitation, gripping himself in hand and pushing the tip right into a still loose, thoroughly well-fucked Adam that keened at full volume at taking him back in and scared Blake’s prey away, not that he cared one bit about it in that moment.

He ended up sounding like an animal, pressing Adam right onto the dirt as he all but mounted him.

***

He gave up hunting entirely a couple of hours after that when they were trying to get clean in a streak and he caught Adam scooping the come gathered in his hole with a couple of fingers, body twisted like a pretzel so he could see himself down there.

“Look, it’s so red and swollen,” he commented, shameless and breathy just like it drove Blake absolutely crazy, never mind the position alone would’ve gotten him hard as a rock in the blink of an eye, “But I still want you in me, babe, so bad.”

“Gonna give you what you need, darling,” he vowed, pulling Adam’s hips to him so he could stick his cock right in, “Gonna fill you right up again, you’ll see.”

Adam gurgled a little bit, rising above the water with some trouble and trying to pull him back on solid ground as Blake slammed into him but clinging to him with both hands and giving up on it when the taller man planted his feet and didn’t budge.

He swore his hips had never moved that fast.

***

It was a good thing he had agreed to give more because by the time he took Adam back to L.A. with the excuse of having a few business meetings in town, his lover was still walking a little bit funny.

That coupled with the brief but open-mouthed kiss they shared were enough to clue Adam's friends right in. They stared at Blake, gaping, and turned to an oblivious Adam for an explanation.

Blake tried but failed to bite back a smirk, nuzzling Adam's temple before pressing a kiss right on his favorite spot behind the pop singer's ear, guiding Adam to sit on his lap, darkly satisfied they'd know Adam was his from then on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you have suggestions for 'your own kink' (the next fill) i'd appreciate them.


	20. your own kink

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was supposed to be size kink but idk what it is honestly, sorry.

Adam sets his bag down slowly just by the door, toeing off his sneakers to pad the rest of the way into Blake’s new house in Tishomingo.

It’s slightly bigger than the place Adam was used to visit him at and decorated in a way that screams single man on his forties who should probably give a shit about it but really doesn’t; there’s four creepy deer heads hanging on the wall, a thick brown carpet made out of bear hide that includes the head and makes Adam gulp in discomfort as he thinks that yeah, he definitely isn’t going to stop and give himself a tour.

He won’t be missing anything that isn’t more dead animals lying around, he’s pretty sure of it.

His heart thumps madly in his chest and he can’t even scowl at how nervous he is about being here; he basically invited himself in and didn’t even have the decency to warn Blake with a text on his way from the airport, naively hoping the country singer would be thrilled to see him anyway and almost—who the fuck is he kidding, alright, _needing_ the dumbass to be thrilled to see him.

He might be pushing his boundaries a little too much, he’s aware of it, but as always he thrives on the adrenaline of the risk he’s taking instead of stopping to ponder about just how bad of an idea this can be.

He cooks a late lunch for them when he realizes the house is empty, stubbornly pushing out of his head the thought of Blake being out seeing someone else and infuriatingly not quite managing it because their—their _thing_ , whatever it is they are now, _they_ are too new to even think about discussing exclusivity.

He can’t exactly send a _yo, are you fucking someone else_ to get rid of all the worry and dread now making his movements shaky and hasty, a hair from being outright frantic.

He knows that Blake’s divorce didn’t even hit him as hard as his own did but still—maybe the country star needs a couple more months to feel studly and date about as many attractive people as he can squeeze into his busy life.

The plunging his heart makes at even the possibility that’s actually the case lets him know that, yeah, he’s kinda too ready to commit to their relationship and not at all ready to realize they’re not on the same page.

He turns off the stove while trying to bottle the horrible feeling up but ends up covering his face with his hands and sobbing pitifully, cursing himself for being so fucking dumb and coming all the way over here when for all he knows he’s just another fling Blake is having just because he’s fit and confident and single now.

He contemplates going away and never mentioning he was here at all but decides against it; whatever happens now, he’s going to face it.

Better to get it done with now, if there’s more heartbreak in his future.

Besides, it’s not like he can actually get away from this.

There’s nowhere in the world where he can hide from his own feelings and—hey, maybe, maybe Blake has always been just a little bit in love with him too or he at least—he at least cares about Adam, period, yeah, he’d make do with that.

He curls up on the couch, pulls his hoodie up and over his eyes, and hopes Blake is back soon.

He originally wanted to surprise him but crying always drains him and he’s too fucking anxious to sit around waiting for him without going crazy anyway so sleeping is his best option.

It takes him about an hour to stop kicking and squirming.

If Blake gave him the keys in the first place it means he wants him around, right? That Adam couldn’t possibly be intruding or being clingy or anything like that.

Right?

***

Blake rouses him with a soft, warm kiss, his eyes bright and open at catching the lead man crashing in his place out of the blue. He crouches in front of him and smiles, gaze too sharp on every bit of him for his liking.

Adam breathes in unevenly and pulls Blake into a deeper, longer kiss by the denim jacket he’s wearing, really hoping he was quick enough to hide the evidence of his breakdown from his boyfriend-lover-partner-whatever it is they are now, shivering when Blake’s big hands grab his waist to pull him closer.

“Hmmm,” Blake hums like he just ate a particularly good candy and even though Adam utterly failed at hiding from him judging by his thumbs gently massaging the puffy corners of his eyes, he doesn’t mention it and just nuzzles against him, hands picking Adam up effortlessly so he’s sitting on the country star’s lap instead of on the couch, “You’re a sight for sore eyes, you know that?”

Adam tries to bite back a loopy smile but has to duck his head and burrow into Blake’s neck to pretend he’s not ridiculously happy and relieved and _in love_ with every bit of the man that’s holding him in his arms from his stupid twang to those damn dimples to how tall and—huh— _lengthy_ he is just about everywhere.

Even now that he’s shaken off weight, Blake is still broader and stronger and just bigger than him and Adam likes that a little too much, loves how safe it feels to lean back against Blake’s chest or snuggle into his side where he fits and there’s still room to spare.

He scrunches his nose and pulls away as soon as he catches the stink on Blake’s skin like he’s been in the woods for days and hell, knowing him, he probably has.

“Ugh,” he grouses, standing up and batting Blake’s hands away when the man follows him, “Aren’t there like lakes or streaks wherever it is you went on your killing spree, Big Foot? You smell like something _died_ on you!”

“Why would I pick those when I have a perfectly nice shower waiting for me back home?” the taller man counters, smirking as he checks Adam out from head to toe in an obnoxiously obvious way that makes him roll his eyes, “Along with a pretty thing to share it with.”

“Oh yeah? Not until you’re clean, jackass, I don’t think so,” he snorts, running outside to breathe fresh air that doesn’t reek of blood and wet pelt.

It backfires on him when he literally stumbles over the gutted carcass of a deer, its belly torn open letting Adam see almost every organ in it and hitting him in the face with such a strong whiff of _death_ that he’s gagging and retching before he knows it, doubled over a few feet from it and wincing at tasting bile and acid on his tongue since he hasn’t eaten to have something to actually puke in his stomach.

Fuck, he can take gore when he knows it is the fake Hollywood kind, not when it’s fucking Bambi’s dad lying there on the grass staring up at him with black, dim eyes as flies hover over it greedily.

Blake is right by his side in an instant, rubbing his back gently and steading him when he gets so woozy with nausea he can’t keep his eyes open or his legs up.

He pulls him back into the house firmly as Adam fights the sick still wanting to come up his throat, setting his jaw and trying to focus on how good Blake’s hands feel on him and nothing else.

“Easy now,” the country singer soothes him when he throws up a little bit more bile and saliva into the toilet before he can even get around to helping Adam to rinse his mouth, “I got you.”

He’s no stranger to hunting but he realizes belatedly and quite stupidly that Blake has always shielded him from the worst of it, mindful of Adam’s delicate sensibilities as much as he teases him for being an useless, clueless city boy.

The half an inch of hair that’s grown back on his head after shaving it is sticking to his forehead and his stomach is still churning so he’s very thankful Blake isn’t mocking him about this just yet even though he knows this will be ammunition used against him sooner or later because that’s what they do, relationship status notwithstanding.

It gets better once Blake presses a towel drenched in perfume to his nose and mouth and he draws in long, thankful breaths as the country singer presses a kiss to his brow.

“I’ll get clean, give me five,” he says, leaving him on top of the toilet seat to strip and get into a steaming hot shower without asking him to join him or leave.

It feels so unbearably, deliciously domestic like they’ve been together and married for years and are at total ease with each other that it’s like a punch to the gut, worse than any kind of blow he could ever get.

He wants this so bad he can’t believe he didn’t notice sooner just how much he does.

***

Blake gets out of the shower pristine clean—all long limbs and tanned, strong muscles that Adam still wants to memorize and touch and kiss as if he hadn’t done that dozens of times before- and wraps a large, fluffy towel around his middle and starts shaving right beside him, sparing patient looks for him whenever he catches Adam staring at him quietly and leaving that bit of stubble that burns pleasantly every time they kiss—and wherever he kisses Adam too.

“This acceptable?” his lover asks, teasing, and Adam sucks in a breath, torn between crying again and jumping Blake’s bones.

He nods, shoving both his insecurities and feelings as far down as he can, and rinses the nasty aftertaste of vomit with Blake’s mouthwash dutifully before tearing the towel from his body and pressing right against his glorious, still steaming bare frame.

Blake lets out a small, low grunt that Adam has come to associate with him being ridiculously turned on and leans down to stick his tongue between his parted, waiting lips, cock bouncing between their thighs as the smaller man whimpers into the kiss because Blake’s hands are roaming and rough all over him, tugging his clothes off or aside with the exact kind of blind, desperate determination that Adam needs him to feel for him.

“You’re banned from wearing _these_ here,” Blake drawls, sounds too fucking husky and lusty to be actually mad about Adam’s skinny jeans when he finally gets them off, “Not legal for me to take this long to get laid, not under my roof.”

Adam snorts, gasping when the country singer manhandles him up onto the bathroom countertop like he weighs nothing and blushing with how obviously hard that makes him, his dick giving him away by jerking and leaking a fat drop of pre-come from the tip.

“Want me on all fours all the time too, cowboy?” he asks, spreading his legs and touching his rim with his fingers, rubbing it just to rile Blake up more as he gives his lover his best, most indecent look, “If you fuck me well enough, that could be arranged.”

He groans even before Blake smirks, obnoxiously proclaiming, “Challenge accepted,” as he’s rummaging through the cabinets of his own bathroom in search of lube and condoms.

It takes him too fucking long for Adam to even entertain the idea someone else has been here in months or even weeks, touching Blake like this and pulling him closer by digging his fingers into the strong line of his spine as he takes finger by finger in and licks his lips when Blake finally rolls a condom on and lines himself up.

Every limb and bit of his body arches like a bow as Blake breaches him, whimpering and closing his legs tighter around Blake’s hips when his thick girth is finally sheathed to the hilt. It stings, it sure does, but he pushes through the initial pain and barrels into the mind-numbing pleasure just at the reach of his fingers.

He feels so wonderfully full and he knows he sounds like a fucking cat in heat but he can’t help it; he loves the easy slide of their bodies and how naturally Blake covers him up, enveloping him in a thick haze of pleasure that he never wants to stop feeling.

They kiss erratically as they fuck, the mirror behind Adam’s back still damp and slippery with steam from Blake’s shower, the coldness of it against his skin just making him blush and squirm more as the older man thrusts in.

“Blake, _fuck_ ,” he pants, mouth agape as he stares up at his lover, feeling both the wide stretch of his hole around Blake’s dick and the rock steady, deep in and out of his length in him. He doesn’t know which one he likes best so he just yowls and clings to Blake’s body, pushing to meet the perfect rolling of his hips and loving how the tiles around them make every filthy noise they make louder and harder to forget.

He wants Blake to remember this, wants him to jack off to thoughts of him right here whenever he gets his cock out to take a leak; he wants no one ever being able to satisfy Blake like he does, wants him all for himself even though it’s probably—almost definitely—too soon to ask or even hope for that.

Blake looks so fucking hot like this, he always does; his hair plastered to his face and his eyes dark and wild with the need to chase his release.

He’s gripping Adam’s ass to pick him up before he notices it, hips speeding up as he holds Adam up and pushes right into him without even bending his knees to support the extra weight.

Adam yelps at the change in position, decides this is one of his favorites because like this is impossible to deny how big and strong Blake is and he can bounce on his cock no problem if he clenches the muscles of his legs and hooks his calves on the country star’s thighs.

Blake groans and pants, his skin slick with moist and sweat when Adam grasps at his arms or sides even though he’s not worried about falling at all; he knows that Blake can take him in pretty much any way he feels like and if he feels like doing a bit of heavy lifting while fucking Adam’s brains out then he’s happy to comply and darkly pleased he’s small enough compared to him to allow this to happen.

Blake’s cock is so long and thick it feels like it’s reaching places in him he didn’t even know existed, choking him almost to the point of overwhelming him and making him hungry for every bit of it at the same time, his hole clamping around him insatiably whenever his balls slap against him.

“Wanna come in your mouth, hun,” Blake breathes heavily against his lips and Adam nods frantically, practically mewling as the taller man staggers out of the bathroom and into the living room, hips still rocking to hit and brush his sweet spot right like he needs him to and then some.

He comes with a whole-body jolt, limbs tingling and eyes rolling back in his head as pleasure takes a firm, delicious hold of him, comes right on time as Blake is thrusting the final times and settling Adam on his back on the sofa before pulling out to rip the condom off and chuck it aside, climbing on his knees until his groin is right over Adam’s face.

He straightens up a little and takes the head into his mouth, gripping the shaft firmly in hand to get it down from where it’s standing proud and hard in front of Blake, sucking as much of the well-endowed member as he can and gurgling with the effort, eyes watering anew for taking something bigger than he can metaphorically chew but doing it anyway.

It takes just that for Blake’s dick to twitch and spurt into the back of his throat, making him fight against coughs itching to come out but winning, eyelids fluttering and cheeks hollowing as the taller man rocks into him to empty himself in tiny thrusts.

He licks his lover’s softening cock clean, covering it with long stripes of spit as Blake lingers there, seemingly content to trap Adam between his knees and give him his cock to lap at.

He missed a few drops that Blake pushes into his mouth with long fingers that Adam sucks greedily, staring up at him smugly when he gets the country singer to drop on top of him and press against him again, body already eager to get off again.

He moans a little louder than he should have at that, at least so soon, and Blake looks at him piercingly for the few seconds Adam bears to meet his eyes before lowering his head.

It’s absolutely embarrassing, how he craves the feeling of Blake’s frame and weight against him or over him as much as he craves to have him just by himself.

Maybe if he’s good enough of a lay, maybe then he’ll get to keep him.

He doesn’t want to think about forever even though it’s the second time in his life he’s with someone he feels he can share his life with; he’s learned to be wary but his heart wants Blake to stay anyway.

“Something you want to share, rock star?” he drawls, eyebrow raised curiously as he waits for an answer that Adam won’t give.

“Hmm-mm,” he concedes, resourceful enough to derail the dangerous conversation to something filthy and instinctive that neither of them can resist, reaching between his legs with his hand to shove three of his fingers right up his ass, hissing as he adds a fourth with some trouble but loving how the burn of that stretch reminds him of Blake being inside him, “That I want you inside again real bad, babe.”

“Fucking hell, Adam,” Blake swears, looking down between his legs and practically drooling at the sight, hand scrambling to jerk himself off harshly to try and get hard for him again as he leans down to nip Adam’s bottom lip and claim his mouth in a filthy, long mess of a kiss.

Adam’s hands reach blindly for him when they’re too breathless to keep going, trying to help as his arm holds on to Blake’s broad back and he hides his face on Blake’s shoulder, crying out in relief and pleasure when Blake replaces his fingers inside of him with his longer, bigger ones.

It feels like a small eternity when they can finally go at it again, Blake manhandling him like he’s a particularly warm sex doll so he’s on his hands and knees as he slams right into him swiftly, bending all over Adam’s back and gripping him right below his neck with an arm to keep him in place as he fucks him doggy-style and makes Adam arch his neck just so he can feel the five inches and muscle that Blake has on him.

He hangs his head next, presenting his ass up by locking his knees and the heel of his hands firmly on the couch and undulating his hips in time to shove right onto Blake’s cock whenever he’s sliding in.

Tears trickle down his chin and his nose and his chest feels too constricted all of a sudden so he knows they’re not induced by what they’re doing but rather by what Adam can’t say because he doesn’t want to ruin what they have going on now.

He breathes heavily, stuttering broken moans and praise when Blake’s hold on one of his hipbones relents and he grips Adam in hand instead and makes him moan so loud he’s positive he’s screaming now.

“Gonna touch you like I touch myself,” Blake assures into his ear hotly, making him whine and press up and back wantonly for more, “Gonna do it while I’m fucking your tight little ass.”

Adam trembles from head to toe, absolutely out of his mind as his body gets hot and tingly, his orgasm racing to meet him as he resolutely tries to commit to memory the way Blake’s hand strokes his cock deftly, the way his pointer finger flicks his frenulum and rubs his head and how great he is at figuring out exactly how tight Adam wants it, his palm just this side of too dry.

“Gonna fill you up with my come so you can fold like a pretzel and scoop it from your hole to see.”

His cheeks grow hotter when he realizes that yeah, Blake isn’t wearing a condom this time and he’s obviously not planning to pull out and he should probably be a little bit grossed out instead of absolutely fucking _hungry_ for it but he is and he wants it so bad he clenches around him and hopes he can feel every drop Blake has to give.

They find a good, tantalizing rhythm—they always do—and every time Blake’s hips speed up he swears he’s going to break in the best way there is.

“Blake, _oh_ ,” he whimpers, starting to feel his lover’s dick pulsing inside of him at the same time the taller man seems to fold tighter around him, covering him up with his bigger frame as every bit of their bodies slot together seamlessly from their hips to their shoulders, “Fucking give it to me.”

He startles when Blake groans loudly and spills inside him as if on command, the sensation different but so very welcome it only takes him a few more seconds to twitch in Blake’s hand and finish on the upholstery with long, creamy stripes as the country singer brushes and licks his nape with wet, parted lips.

They catch their breaths still joined, Adam turning his head to the side so he can nuzzle Blake’s nose blearily.

He gasps, mouth slack in a mix of surprise and soreness, when Blake pulls out abruptly and breaks apart to seemingly admire the stretched, swollen hole he fucked open between Adam’s cheeks.

“Look at you, you’re so freaking loose,” Blake marvels, a couple of his thick fingers testing the little resistance he offers to the intrusion, “Leaking my come from that pretty hole of yours,” he bears down on purpose so more come drips and tickles his sack and Blake groans, leaning down to kiss and suck marks on his spine almost worshipfully as his hands hold Adam in place easily, encompassing his waist as he shivers and pants with the country star’s ministrations.

Blake scoops him up to his lap when he’s apparently sated and Adam is so fucking glad he doesn’t want to let go of him yet, so grateful he gets to be in Blake’s arms for a little longer that he just closes his eyes and snuggles with him, enjoying the warmth of his skin along with how good it feels to tuck his head right under the taller man’s chin and his arms between his still heaving chests.

They eventually pull back and it’s only when the country star’s thumbs wipe his eyes that Adam remembers he cried a little bit too much to blame it on the heat of the moment and freezes, feeling like a prey Blake is about to shoot dead after finding its weakness.

“You came all the way here to see if you found me fucking somebody else, didn’t you?” his lover prompts, raising his eyebrows when Adam splutters and shakes his head.

“I—no, of course not,” he corrects, breath hitching, and his mouth runs faster than his mind before he can stop it, “I just, I wanted to see you and if you actually were with someone else—well, we haven’t exactly talked about that. I couldn’t get angry at you for that, don’t be stupid.”

Blake’s half-lidded eyes turn impossibly soft then, so much Adam feels himself blushing and has to look away.

He’s not sure what the fuck he said that was so good Blake grips his chin gently with his fingers and guides him up to meet his lips, kissing him sweetly before pecking his cheeks and lean his forehead against his.

“You’re an idiot,” Blake whispers near his mouth.

It’s not what Adam wanted to hear but it’s fond enough to appease him.

“Shut up,” he counters, childish.

Blake chuckles, smooching his face some more as his hands leave his waist to caress Adam’s thighs gently as he keeps straddling him.

“I don’t need anybody but you, darling.”

And—there it is, exactly what his dumb, treacherous heart needed to stop fretting.

Adam bites his lip, feeling a silly smile still quirking the corners of his mouth as he looks up at Blake.

“So we’re—“ he tries, hopeful, “We’re really—“

“Together,” Blake fills in, content, “For real.”

He cups Blake’s face, so fucking pleased at the news he’s more than a bit embarrassed, and kisses him deeply, drunk on the way their bodies fit and how much smaller his chest feels against his—now confirmed—boyfriend.

Blake doesn’t really take long to push him against the arm of the sofa and press Adam’s legs on his chest so he can expose him as he keeps his calves up and peers at him between his legs.

“You’re so lithe,” he says, awed, and Adam laughs breathily, stuttering to a halt to moan as Blake tosses a leg to the side and scoots closer to him on the couch to press right into him, stretching him wide again just like he loves.


	21. shower sex

He’s never understood the need to kiss someone until it stings, to hold and grip a lover until they bruise, but spending so many hours of the day with Adam knowing perfectly well he can’t touch him until they’re out of sight helps him understand where the charm of all that may be.

It’d be easier, he thinks, to look at him knowing the younger man still feels him, still lives the repercussions of their last time together.

It’s not exactly new, this thing between them, and it’s scary how greedy he’s turning over time. Whether it’s insecurity after two failed marriages or just plain possessiveness or a bit of both, he’s still screwed; he wants Adam to remember every minute of every hour who makes him come at night, who wrings out of him the hottest gasps and moans, who gets his voice to crack with pleasure and his eyes to water with feelings neither of them will probably never talk about, the same feelings that have Blake squeezing just a little too tight and driving single-mindedly into him every time.

It was supposed to be easy and freeing, this thing between them, but Blake has never been happier to feel this trapped.

***

He waits for Adam wetting his mouth and throat with Patron, sitting almost in the dark in the living room of a house that’s never been a home to him in a city that’s never made him feel welcome except for the brief times he’s been tangled with a certain pop singer more than enamored with Los Angeles.

Adam takes the glass from his fingers fluidly, slipping to his lap with a sureness that makes his breath hitch and his blood rush in his veins as he’s parting his lips and moving his hands to the small of the front man’s back.

He takes a sip, smirking when he catches Blake staring and breathing hard as Blake pulls him closer and teases his mouth with brushes of his lips that make them both ache for the deep kiss they start after Adam puts the drink down somewhere on the couch’s arm and weaves strong arms around Blake’s neck.

He sucks and nibbles Adam’s bottom lip, flicks his tongue against his and tries but fails to ignore the pang in his chest as the kiss turns naturally sweet and almost soft because they feel so much more than lust for each other but can’t—won’t—put it into words and this is all they can do, all they will ever be able to do.

The lean man in his arms makes a strangled noise when Blake turns things dirty again by dipping his hand under Adam’s tight jeans, his fingers just reaching the crevice between his cheeks and that warm place that’s just waiting for him to claim again.

They grind and breathe heavily as he rubs there tirelessly, their cocks hard and twitching as their hips and lips find such a good rhythm that it’s like they’re making a new kind of music that Blake doesn’t want to need this bad but does.

There’s a bathroom just a few feet away and he pulls Adam up easily, the smaller man’s feet barely touching the ground as they stumble to it and strip.

They have a party to get ready for and multitasking is the only way they’re going to make it there just fashionably late instead of not at all.

Adam gives him a bright, thrilled grin when he guesses what Blake has in mind, helping him to open the faucet to regulate the water while he’s too busy smooching and licking the curve of his neck and that spot where his pulse jumps every time they’re together that calls to him like a beacon to a stranded ship.

It pisses him off, thinking this is hardly the first or even the tenth time Adam has probably done something like this, but he pushes him into the shower and grabs his ass anyway, flushing him to his broader body as water cascades down on them.

Adam clings to him, a strong hand gripping his shoulder and the other tugging his hair just enough to make it good, and moves his hips effortlessly to rut against him and keep their dicks entertained as Blake preps him hastily, wondering if the lead man will actually let him hurt him just a little bit so that he’s hobbling for the rest of the night and probably a few hours of tomorrow morning as well.

He’s never been the vicious type but he wants Adam to think of him so bad and this—this is the one thing he can come up with to stay with him even when he’s not, to linger on his skin long after he’s taken him like this.

It looks like Adam has no qualms about getting a little bit roughed up if the way he moans and stretches up to kiss him eagerly when Blake digs his fingertips into the jut of his hipbone is anything to go by and he’s not sure whether that’s good or bad but damn if he’s not glad about it.

His hands hesitate between turning Adam so his chest is against the tiles or not; he ends up picking him up and clumsily trying to find his hole as his lover gapes at him and holds on to him with sinewy limbs, gasping when Blake keeps missing and just pushes him harder against the cold tiles.

“Fuck, just—just wait, hold on—“ Adam murmurs, breathless, gripping him in hand making Blake groan loudly as he helps him in.

“ _Adam_ ,” he calls out and it both sounds and feels like a punch right in the gut.

He doesn’t know which feels better; if the way Adam’s supple body takes him in little by little or the way he arches at being filled and moans loudly as the country singer thrusts in as carefully as he can and can’t help but keeping him out of most of the spray, the shower only reaching Blake’s back and a bit of his thighs as steam makes the air even hotter around them.

If it hurts, Adam doesn’t let on. He’s willing and beautiful as always as Blake fucks him, looking at him behind half-lidded eyes with his face taut with pleasure just like Blake loves seeing, his body skilled and smart pushing back onto him and clinging to his back in the same promising, bruising way Blake needs to touch him with.

It’s so intense and mind-blowing he has no idea if he lasts long or not at all, spurting into Adam’s clenching entrance suddenly and unrepentantly. He rides the big wave of his orgasm panting hard, eyes still fixed on Adam’s pretty face so he’s watching intently when he squirms and moans through his own climax after Blake sneaks a hand between their bellies and grips him tight, pointer finger stroking the head of Adam’s cock just a couple of times to get him off, arm locked around Adam’s middle to keep him up and still impaled on his softening length.

They’re both wobbly when Blake puts him down and back under the spray and he lathes the perfect body he’s just taken with soap getting Adam to chuckle breathlessly and return the favor by washing Blake’s mess of grey and brown hairs, reaching up to knead his head with a slight smile that hurts a bit to look at.

He doesn’t stop to think about the fact Adam’s favorite shampoo—even though his hair is still too short to need much of it—and lotions are there or how there are both suits and casual clothes he can pick from once they’re out getting dressed despite this is Blake’s house and they’re not there very often except for some hurried bouts of sex and to get some sleep afterward and—oh.

He blinks, almost sheepish, when Adam stands on his tiptoes to peck him goodbye when he’s ready.

“See you there, Big Country,” his little lover says, fixing the collar of Blake’s jacket with a smile, “You’ll come home later, right?”

 _Oh_ , his heart flutters, aware more than ever that going to Adam’s side is the closest thing to home he’s got, whether he wants to admit it or not because they’ve made a space in their lives and hearts for each other already.

He nods, dumbstruck, and watches Adam go with just a bit of a limp in his step.


	22. on the desk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is so lame. i apologize.

There’s a bitter aftertaste in the back of his throat, something akin to grief, when he pulls Blake in for a kiss by the lapels of his jacket and seals his mouth over his.

It doesn’t go away completely and it’s scary, confirming over and over again they share the type of love that hurts to feel but would hurt more not to, but it’s soothing and heady in just the way he needs.

Blake holds him tighter, hands pulling him even closer by the nape and right hipbone, and even though his arms are trapped between their bodies Adam’s heart is flapping and thrilled like it’s trying to take flight, like it’s never felt freer.

“I missed you,” Blake murmurs in that stupid, charming twang of his.

He peppers Adam’s jawline with little kisses when the front man ducks his head to hide a small smile in reply.

His stubble burns his clean-shaven cheeks just enough to leave a pleasant tingle that lasts underneath his skin for a moment and he doesn’t even try to voice the long list of reasons they shouldn’t be losing themselves in each other’s arms during a party at Pharrell’s place where the only empty room they could find is a cozy but clearly private study.

Blake steers him to the desk in it not all at subtly, hoisting him up by the thighs, and he spreads his legs to fit him in between instead of complaining or reminding him just how very loud Adam is.

He doesn’t think the country singer needs him to point out how bad of an idea this is. He’s sure Blake just doesn’t give a damn about it which is wrong probably but also very fucking hot.

He looks up at him, eyes cloudy and wet with want, and they share a look for a moment that has Adam parting his lips and shivering as Blake reaches behind him to close the curtains of the room and kisses him like it’s going out of style.

He moans into Blake’s mouth when the taller man grips his legs hard and pushes his thighs just a little wider, frees his arms to cling to Blake’s back as he’s unnecessarily but deliciously seduced; he loves the way Blake touches him, so sure and unrepentant and easy with just a hint of desperation in it that never lets him forget how craved and wanted he is.

They throw most of the stuff on the desk off as they make out and grope each other, not even pausing when a loud clank announces they’ve probably just broken something very expensive.

He hums appreciatively as his fingertips outline Blake’s cock through the dark, nice fitting jeans he’s chosen for the night, fondling him just enough to make him go crazy and speed things just a little bit along.

Blake nips at his bottom lip, making him gasp loudly at both the sting of it and the sudden way he’s unzipped and taken out of his clothes, his lover’s broad palm nestling him just right as his fingers curl around him and start pumping him at a steady pace.

He tugs Blake’s shirt out of his pants—he tucked it in for a change, which makes his legs look even longer and drives Adam absolutely crazy—gasping as he leans a flushed cheek against his partner’s and trying but failing to return the favor as his shaky fingers fight with the button of Blake’s jeans.

He’s just succeeded while hindered by the country star’s skilled strokes when the man drops to his knees and takes him into his mouth without as much as a warning first. It takes everything in him not to scream in utter delight, muffling a shocked cry behind a hand as he rediscovers the perfect warmth and fit of Blake’s throat around him.

By then his suit is almost all the way off his shoulders and he lies down on the desk, arching his back and scrambling for something to hold on to as his lover hollows his cheeks and presses the flat of his tongue just over his slit, apparently having every intention to pick up rhythm to bob his head and suck Adam’s brains out of his dick.

He covers his mouth harder, eyes rolling back and pleasure traveling from his groin to every inch of him as Blake pulls his hips closer to the edge and yanks his pants out of the way so he can lick Adam’s sack before shoving the tip of his tongue between his cheeks.

“Oh my God, babe, shit,” he whispers, trying to keep the noises he’s making to a minimum but there’s no mistaking what they’re doing now, not with the way Blake is licking into him as if he wanted to memorize his rim as well as prying it open, “The door—“

Blake growls, the clenching of his throat as he takes him in briefly again getting Adam incoherent again in a second flat, and he stops thinking about the lock and whether or not people can hear them through the walls and hooks his legs on Blake’s shoulders instead, feeling tears pushing to come out from how hard he’s trying not to be loud.

“Turn over,” Blake says, voice a husky rumble that’s a caress all in itself, and he hurries to comply and tries not to miss Blake’s grip on him as his lover uses his hands to open a small package of lube by the sound of it, Adam’s expensive suit pooling around his ankles in the new position.

Adam whimpers into his elbow and follows, one of Blake’s hands tilting his hips just like he wants as a slick finger prods and pushes right in followed by another.

He tenses and has to literally bite into his clothes when the country singer breaches him, almost crying out and bucking his lover off of him as Blake gets so into it he forgets he’s too fucking big for this to be smooth so fast but settling back down when one of Blake’s hands closer over his mouth firmly and he’s thoughtful enough to notice what’s going on and stop.

“Sorry, darling,” he says, leaning down to kiss Adam’s nape, “I got you now.”

Adam sighs, shutting his eyes and relaxing with Blake’s breath and lips brushing his skin. He still almost screams when Blake bottoms out, thrashing a little to get his nose out of under Blake’s grip.

Blake groans, sounds like he’s biting his tongue not to shout out how good Adam is at taking cock, and whether they make too much noise or not Adam couldn’t say. He’s too aware of Blake’s strong arm around his hips, of his palm over his mouth and his fingers curled on his jaw, of his broad chest pressed hotly against his back, and how his lover is using every point of contact to bring him closer each time he’s thrusting in.

All too soon it’s not enough and the country singer has to straighten up and stop nibbling on the crook of his neck to keep quiet so he can pick up the pace and the desk scrapes the floor a little bit with their fucking, which should probably be worrying instead of arousing but Adam smirks as he moans and feels stupidly accomplished about that and the way Blake can’t keep his own groans in check.

It’s a race to the edge then, the fullness of Blake inside him thrusting deeper and harder as if he never wanted to do anything else, and the friction of his own dick against the desk reminding him of just how dirty this is.

It’s less suffocating with Blake standing up behind him and pushing his hips against his ass instead of crushing him under him but he still feels like he’s about to burst out of his skin, sweat pooling in the small of his back and tickling down his forehead as he moves right along with his boyfriend until they’re both trembling and grunting lowly, finally catching their release.

His bespoke suit is probably ruined but he can’t find it in him to actually care, not with Blake tugging him up so they can kiss slowly, still panting, when Adam turns his head to the side with a smile that his lover put there by nuzzling his neck and shoulder down to the place his shirt has slipped off his body, too sweetly for the mess they just made of each other.

They put their rumpled clothes back in place at best they can and Adam arches an eyebrow at the poor attempt of tidying up they make.

“This is pathetic,” he huffs, “He’s going to notice.”

“He won’t know it was us if we hurry,” Blake says with a shrug, pulling him to the door when Adam scowls, “C’mon now, you can buy him a nice big present later when it’s not obvious you’re feeling guilty about this.”

“That’s—“ actually a very good idea, except, “You’re buying him something too, asshole.”

His dumbass lover agrees with a flippant wave of his hand and leads him back to the party with a proprietary arm around his waist that no one bats an eye about.


	23. trying new position

Adam swallowed gingerly, tears springing almost all the way out of his eyes as the action highlighted the soreness in his throat.

He shut his eyes tight, angry at himself after long hours gone to waste because a little pain rendered him apparently useless even to sleep.

He tried to calm down, relishing the warm presence behind him and the long, strong arm resting gently over his hip, the way Blake’s knees were neatly tucked behind his as they lied on his bed.

It really wasn’t a wasted night if he’d spent it cuddling with Blake, that much he knew. They barely got a moment to themselves like this and for that Adam was almost glad his stupid illness had forced them to stay indoors and together instead of going out to probably visit a bunch of their friends and drink entirely too much to be healthy even by Blake’s standards.

His cowboy snored lightly against his hair, his nose nuzzling the back of his head in his sleep almost too lovingly to be—well, safe. It made him smile, pulling him out of his misery for a little bit.

Neither of them had actually expected their feelings to run this deep after fucking years of sexual tension out of their systems but after three months of being irrevocably entangled they still enjoyed the time they spent in each other’s arms and, if Adam was being honest with himself, he did cherish more than anything the unintentional grip he had on Blake’s heart. The tug he could feel around his own from Blake’s own fingers was a small price to pay to feel this cared for, this—huh. Well.

He could stop himself from even thinking about the L word but that didn’t make it any less true. He hissed, the anxiety of acknowledging he was way too deep in this worsening the paranoia he felt as even breathing made him believe there were tiny, ruthless knives scratching his throat raw and that he would never ever sing again, not in the clear way he was used to.

He whimpered, burrowing his face into his pillow. His head throbbed horribly, reminding him he hadn’t been able to sleep a fucking wink, and every muscle on his body was coiled tight since he’d refused to squirm and risk waking Blake up so even that little movement made him feel worse.

Of course Blake had to stir when he was crying like a spoiled child who’d refused to take his medicine and now suffered the consequences, which he kind of was. The cold medicine his boyfriend had procured for him sat unused on his bedside table along with the empty mug of the chamomile tea sweetened with honey he had accepted even after tasting the treacherous sprinkle of lemon in it.

“It’ll soothe your throat, you’ll see,” the country singer had vowed, citing some old recipe from the South and how it’d worked on him when he was growing up.

He’d been right, Adam had to admit; for an hour or so, his throat had felt blissfully okay. He’d been able to eat a little bit before snuggling with Blake for the night, it was just too bad the effect had ran out before he’d been able to fall asleep.

“Aw honey,” Blake murmured, sympathetic instead of mocking and wow, that should worry him a lot because it wasn’t the way they worked, “Why didn’t you wake me up?”

Even last night when Adam had been sick enough to lie on his bed and cough weakly as he squinted up at his boyfriend trying to get a rise out of him by incessant jokes that hit a little bit too close to home, it’d felt normal.

He registered the endearment absently, tucking it away to ponder on later in the back of his mind. Blake’s twang made it hard to bristle about it anyway, even though they hadn’t even talked about being anything other than friends who occasionally fucked each other’s brains out and cared a little too much for one another to be strictly platonic.

“Go away,” he wanted to say but his voice was such a wreck it came out like nothing but an incoherent cry.

Blake cooed, showering his nape and the side of his neck with soft, sleepy kisses than Adam didn’t want to admit felt great on his aching body and put a surprisingly good lid on his unease too.

“You’re getting sick way too often,” the taller man commented, sounding mildly worried, and when that brought Adam’s stiffness back with a vengeance he went back to kiss his skin and soothe him, “Shhh, darling, easy now. There’s nothing wrong with you, I promise. Just a little cold, you’re gonna be fine.”

How could he say that? Adam wanted to scream at him. How could he say that when he hadn’t been able to speak properly in so long he was starting to think he’d have to get used to not talking, period, and that fucking terrified him to the bone.

What was he, without his voice? A somewhat skilled musician, sure, but there were plenty of those out there, that didn’t make him special at all and it probably turned him into a horrible person but he needed to be special.

He tried elbowing Blake to let go of him and muffle his pitiful sobbing further into his pillow, a distant part of him aware he was being melodramatic. His voice would return, it always did, he would be _fine_ , Blake was right—

“You’re not gonna kick me out, y’know,” Blake pointed out, pressing a patient, lingering kiss on his cheek, “You couldn’t kill a fly right now if you tried. I’m going to bring more tea, alright? Hang in there for me, I’ll be right back.”

He didn’t know how it was possible to feel worse but he did once Blake’s weight left the bed and his warmth abandoned his skin. It was only then he noticed he was drenched in sweat, the loose t-shirt he wore to sleep and his boxers clinging to him along with the damp sheets.

He felt so filthy he was contemplating to crawl into the tub to get a bath, blinking through frustrated tears at the ceiling when Blake came back and sat him up a little on the bed, just enough so he could sip the tea without choking as both his hand and Blake’s held the mug in place and tipped it back every now and then for him to drink comfortably.

“Sorry I didn’t wake up sooner,” Blake apologized, sheepish, “Guess I was more tired than I thought.”

Adam gave him a disbelieving look, raising an eyebrow as if to say ‘are you kidding?’; he was the one who’d sweated all over him after all and together or not his friend had no obligation to take care of him.

He felt even more embarrassed when he realized he couldn’t remember what Blake had been telling him before they went to bed together—something about a benefit concert, maybe, and someone being there that made a flare of ugly jealousy flare in the pit of Adam’s stomach.

He’d never been a possessive partner but Blake somehow always managed to bring the best and the worst in him.

“Can you get up, Adam?” Blake asked, brow endearingly furrowed in concern as he studied Adam’s face half hidden behind the cup, “I could change the sheets while you take a shower. I’m sure that’d help you feel better, wouldn’t it?”

He looked down, both pleased and afraid that Blake knew him that well. He nodded slightly, wincing as the action aggravated the twinge behind his eyes, and took a deep breath before he started to use all his meager strength to pull himself up with Blake hovering awkwardly around him.

He stumbled to the bathroom and stripped without bothering to close the door; his shower had no curtain but he’d never been shy about his body so he opened the faucet and breathed in relief as the hot water soothed his muscles.

If he felt eyes on him the whole time, it only made him smile a little, made him forget about his pathetic state and reminded him that yeah, he was one sexy motherfucker, sick or not.

His strength didn’t last enough to return to his bed without help but he felt too shitty to let his pride get wounded because of it. He allowed himself to fall into Blake’s chest and sighed as his cowboy wrapped the towel tighter around him, holding him securely in his arms to walk backwards to the bedroom and helped him down on the mattress, still naked and wet from the shower, breathing harshly from the exertion of being up.

“Will you take a pill now? It’d help you sleep,” Blake asked, sounding like he already knew what the answer would be. Adam could almost hear him rolling his eyes if he tried hard enough, “Well, I can think of just another thing to help you relax.”

Adam blinked, his eyes unfocused and half-lidded as he tried to look at his lover. The suggestive tone he’d used couldn’t be mistaken as anything else than what it was and as beat as he was, he felt a surge of arousal in his gut as he remembered the last time they’d shared a bed for something other than sleeping.

The feeling of Blake’s awed eyes fixed solely on him as he rode him, quick and dirty enough to make the bed creak beneath them, was almost as good as feeling him reaching deep inside him, brushing places within him that felt so great his dick couldn’t stop leaking even though it bounced untouched between them.

And oh, Blake’s gaping mouth and the groans that he was able to rip from his throat were a thing of beauty to him all on their own. The country star somehow always managed to look so wild and thankful during sex, it made Adam feel so appreciated than having Blake between his cheeks and feeling him against him was like a drug he wasn’t ready to do without.

“Don’t worry, I’ll do all the work,” Blake assured him, tugging the big fluffy towel gently off of him to toss it to the floor and have him bare and willing on the bed for him, already parting his lips as the older man kneeled at each side of his hips and leaned down to kiss him soundly as Adam held on to his neck and ached more for Blake than for the heavenly oblivion of orgasm his lover had promised.

His throat itched, the soothing effect of the hot drink he’d had vanishing quicker than he would’ve liked, and he scowled at himself as Blake drew back and helped him to lie on his side instead of his back when a brief coughing fit assaulted him.

“I don’t think—“ he croaked, his voice running out with as little as three little words.

He wanted to curse so bad it was almost enough to make him cry again but he bit his lip and bottled it up, only huffing to broadcast his frustration.

He didn’t want Blake to stop but he didn’t think he could handle sex right now.

“I got you, Adam, trust me,” Blake reassured him, smoothing a big, familiar hand on his side as his chest heaved, “Just stay like this and let me take care of you, alright?”

He should’ve refused probably, even with Blake’s obvious erection poking his thigh, because he just knew his stupid flu—cold, whatever the fuck it was, was going to ruin things for them at the worst moment but instead he closed his eyes and forced himself to breathe deeply and slowly, trying not to gasp when he felt Blake’s lips latching on to his calf after his boyfriend spread his thighs and kept one of his legs up with a hand firmly clasped around his ankle.

It was more intimate than sexual, the trail of kisses Blake was giving him as his mouth traveled downward. There wasn’t much they hadn’t already tried to please each other but both the position and the circumstances were different enough to make him blush and cover his face with an arm when Blake’s mouth finally brushed the sensitive skin of his inner thigh.

His throat prickled with the need to moan when his lover finally lapped at his sack, the flat of his tongue pressing deliciously behind it, and he had to set his jaw and bite down on one of his fingers as Blake moved on to lick his rim diligently, as if he wanted to memorize every crevice there and make Adam feel each of them as well.

He’d never told Blake about this, about how he’d never allowed anyone to go down on him in such a way and just thinking about how obnoxiously smug that would make him drained every last intention he had of telling him, but sometimes—on moments like these, it felt like Blake just fucking _knew_ , knew how to read the tension but simultaneous trust in Adam’s body enough to feel entitled to do this and pretty much anything else he felt like doing.

He shrieked in delight, the soreness in his throat just a nagging presence in the back of his mind, as Blake took him into his mouth and hollowed his cheeks to distract him from the prodding fingers he could feel wanting to breach him.

He tried to relax for the intrusion, to brace for it at best he could, but between swallowing down every sound that tried to push out of him and the intense pleasure that Blake’s tongue and mouth brought him, lips sealed around him so skillfully he heard himself sob just from how good it was, he was too overwhelmed.

Blake still managed to push a long, broad finger into him before he was coming in his mouth, his hips stuttering tiny thrusts as he arched and came with a silent _oh_ , his mouth slack and his sight blurry with the high brought by a good orgasm.

“Blake,” he whispered, distantly aware he’d sound equally broken even without his voice being so frayed.

His lover released him with a wet pop, mumbling a satisfied, low, “Got you,” before going right back to rim him and made Adam tremble with just how easily his tongue went right in this time, how his fingers pressed in one by one with about as little difficulty too whenever he broke apart to stretch him a little better.

His hand was squeezing his thigh now, keeping Adam’s leg up effortlessly as he all but ate him out, and the pop singer could swear he was going to die if he didn’t get to feel Blake in him soon enough. His tongue was nice and warm and hot but it just wasn’t enough and his headache was rushing back quicker than he thought possible.

He didn’t even notice he was sobbing until he felt Blake kissing his calf again as he straddled his other leg and lined himself up to his entrance to thrust carefully in, almost inch by inch, driving Adam absolutely fucking insane as little raspy sounds made it out of his parted lips.

Blake took his right hand in his, entwining their fingers as he pressed his palm against his and pinned his arm to the bed. He squeezed tighter when he finally bottomed out and Adam had to turn his head to hide as much of his face as he could.

With just that small touch, he felt like Blake knew all his secrets, all his weaknesses.

He’d never felt so bare in his life.

The staccato of Blake’s hips was a blessed distraction, robbing him of his thoughts and only leaving him pleasure to be aware of, tickling under every inch of him.

He found himself squeezing Blake’s hand back, breathing heavily with each slide of his lover’s length in and out of him, his left leg stretched and snug against Blake’s chest.

Their sweaty skin made the slam of Blake’s hips against his ass even louder and he gave up trying to hide from him, reaching to cling to Blake’s shoulder as his boyfriend leaned over him to put more of his weight on each thrust and made his toes curl as a result.

He could feel his hole clenching compulsorily around Blake each time he drove in deep and a smile tried to tug at his lips at the outright obscene noises Blake was making, as if fucking Adam like this was pretty much everything he’d ever wanted in life.

He came with a whole body shudder the second time, feeling Blake grinding in skilled circles right over his prostate. He went limp all over, even the fingers of their held hands losing its grip on Blake as his lover picked rhythm back up to chase his own climax.

He must’ve found it quickly, Adam thought absently, because he felt Blake dabbing at the necessary places of his body with a wet cloth before tugging the dirty top sheet off and kissing his temple as he pulled the comforter over both of them.

He was asleep within minutes, lulled to it by both the sweet lethargy in his limbs and the familiar shape of his lover behind him.


	24. shy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i tried to work a different angle on this prompt, not sure it came out okay .-.

The first time he sees them together—as in, acting like a couple, because before that he’d seen them gravitating towards each other even when the other was at the other end of the room—they’re laughing, sitting on one of the red couches between their trailers, and Blake is holding her face like Gwen is the most precious thing he’s ever touched.

He realizes with a start that maybe she is, that maybe that’s exactly what Blake feels for her, and quietly creeps back into his trailer, locking the door without a sound, without even taking a breath not to disturb them and their—their _moment_.

Catching them holding hands and kissing each other briefly isn’t hard at all after that, although Adam kinda wishes it were because something burns inside of him whenever it happens and he’s never, ever felt like more of an ass than he does then.

He’s supposed to be happy about Blake finally getting a girl who looks at him like he’s the sun, he should be fucking _ecstatic_ about how good Gwen is for him because he’s lost weight, he’s smiling more often than not nowadays and he’s even stopped getting blind drunk without making it seem like a feat, like looking at Gwen and holding her to his side is everything he needs to feel whole now.

He wonders if it’s jealousy, the thing that’s turning his insides into stone after scorching everything like lava laying everything to waste after a big eruption, but he realizes he doesn’t want to find out because getting answers would mean having to deal with whatever it is that he’s feeling and he can’t—he just can’t do it.

“I’m not going,” Blake had said when Adam invited him to his marriage months ahead of time to make sure he wouldn’t have any concerts or any other shit going on that could be more important than his fucking _best friend_ tying the knot with the woman he thought was his soulmate, “She doesn’t deserve you and you’re not gonna last.”

He remembers how his fist colliding with Blake’s cheek had felt back then—he’d moved without thinking, punching him right in the face for even doubting Behati, and Blake had taken it like a champ, like he’d seen it coming and accepted it was only fair after saying what he did.

He tells himself he’s jealous because Blake was right and Behati cried and left him at the altar and the pain was so excruciating the humiliation of having so many people staring as he got his heart shattered in a thousand pieces didn’t even register, because he once had what Blake and Gwen have and he thought he was going to keep it but lost it someewhere along the way.

He wins again—fucking _finally_ —and makes sure to rub it in Blake’s face as much as it’s humanly possible before leaving to tour through South America, makes the most of the fact he always loses weight when they’re working non-stop because he’s hyper and wants everything to be nothing short of perfect, wants every note coming out of his throat and fingers to hit the mark and beats himself up for hours if he misses and has more than enough stuff to distract him from thinking how absolutely smitten Blake is and how that should make him feel anything else than what he’s feeling now.

Of course the guys know him well enough to call him on his bullshit but decide against it, letting Adam cope with it in the only way he knows how—which is to manically push it away until it doesn’t hurt so much, until it doesn’t matter enough to suffocate him and only makes him want to bawl like a baby.

Blake doesn’t call, he never does when Adam’s on tour, but somehow that just makes it worse this time.

***

He sleeps for almost two days in a row when he’s back, only waking up to feed his dogs and blink at his hectic schedule because the new season of the show is coming and he’s so not ready to face Blake and his inevitable question of whether or not Adam gives his relationship with Gwen his blessing.

They’re the kind of friends who always give each other shit and everyone knows that, but they’re also the kind of friends who are never afraid to say the truth when it matters and how is Adam supposed to say what his heart’s been sobbing these past few months without losing Blake forever?

“She loves you so much, you shouldn’t let her go,” he should say and shouldn’t add, “But I don’t like you with her, it just feels so wrong to me, man, sorry.”

He sits on the kitchen tiles, sipping some water as Bones and Charlie munch their meal, only occasionally wiping an errant tear or two from his cheeks that have nothing to do with fatigue and too much to do with things he can’t keep on ignoring unless he wants to end up as roadkill of his own stupid, uninvited feelings.

“We never got time for it but,” he whispers his truth where no one will judge him, breath hitching when his dogs sense something’s very wrong with him and curl up at his sides instead of running outside to play, “I would’ve kissed you, if I could, just once and maybe—maybe that would’ve felt right to me.”

He tries to think back, to think that maybe Blake did feel the same at some point or another and that was the reason he doomed with relationship with Behati but he knows the lovable hick would never have it in him to be that selfish, knows that if he said what he did it was simply to protect Adam from what he saw coming from miles away.

***

The way Blake’s arms hug his waist so effortlessly, the way he pulls Adam to his chest and fucking _nuzzles_ his shoulder like that’s his prerogative, it should make him angry because he’s with _her_ and he shouldn’t torture Adam like this, not like this, but all he can feel is grateful.

He’s still important to Blake, he will always be if he just manages not to fuck it up, and that will have to be enough to keep him from drowning in his own scathing misery.

The staff stares at him like he’s been replaced by a doppelganger when he keeps turning down snacks instead of complaining about how hungry he is and smuggling food into the set.

The thing is, he doesn’t remember what feeling hungry is like. All he remembers now is the weight of the feelings he has to keep bottled up and how, if he’s not careful, he’ll end up throwing all up and hurting people who mean too much to him just because he’s still not used, even after all that’s happened, to not getting what he wants.

***

“You’re really good together,” he tells Blake quietly, curled on the other end of the couch in the country singer’s trailer as they drink beer and he confides in Adam he’s brought Gwen to be his advisor this season, “I’m sure you’ll be great for your team too.”

It hurts to say it but seeing Blake grinning happily behind his drink, eyes alight with joy, that stings even deeper and does not make it worth it even though it fucking _should_ because Blake is the one that matters and Adam’s heart can just go to hell for always picking wrong, for always choosing people who don’t love him the same way he loves them.

“Thanks, buddy,” he drawls, “Everyone says we’re too different to be together but I knew you’d understand.”

“Don’t let her go, man,” Adam pushes, some part of him screaming he doesn’t need to do it but he ignores it because he has to, because Blake deserves this, “She could be it for you.”

“Yeah,” his friend accepts distractedly, like both his mind and heart are far away from him, probably whenever Gwen is right then, “I know.”

Everything is so unfair that Blake decides to thank him by erasing the space Adam carefully put between them to pull him to his lap and seal his lips against his temple.

It feels like so much more than what it really is that Adam has to bite back a sob, torn between running off and melting against Blake forever.

He does neither, tensing instead and waiting for the older man to let go.

“Why are you being so cheesy, man?” he presses when Blake seems to hold him tighter with every second that ticks by, his lips soft and full and warm against the side of his face like a mockery of all the things he won’t ever get, “I’m not the blonde you want to be holding right now, you know.”

“Shut up,” Blake grunts and the way he utters it makes Adam tense ever more, “For once in your goddamn life, Adam, just shut up.”

He does, stays frozen in place as Blake dig his fingers into the small of his back and takes labored breaths against his cheek.

For a moment there, when the taller man finally lets go only to cup his face and look at him with dark, troubled eyes, Adam swears they’re going to kiss.

The brush their lips share as they tremble and hold back could very well be called that.

He’s not sure who stops first, if his hands clutching at Blake’s shoulders do what they’re supposed to and push him off of him at last or if it’s Blake the one that retreats and remembers he has someone back home who doesn’t deserve him playing games.

“Blake, don’t be—don’t be stupid,” he hears himself saying, standing up to tug his short, light hair and he can’t believe he’s pleading the exact opposite of what he wants but he is, “She’s the right one for you. I—I’m trouble, okay? You’re scared, you have to be, it doesn’t have to mean anything.”

“Yeah, is that it?” Blake asks, belligerent in both tone and body language as he pins Adam against the thin wall of the trailer, “I have to love her more than I love you because she’s the right one for me, that what you’re saying?”

“Well you picked her, didn’t you?” Adam attacks right back, pushing against Blake’s chest like he wants to hit him but only managing to fist his shirt and bring him closer, “So yeah, I think you do. You’re just playing with me, asshole. If you want to ruin the best thing in your life right now, don’t you fucking dare use me to do that, you hear me?”

“Shut _up_!” Blake roars this time, bending Adam’s neck painfully by the short hairs on his nape so he can lean down and swallow all the biting words and insults the lead man still had to say to him.

He yelps into the kiss, shocked out of his mind, and it turns into a loud moan when Blake takes advantage of it to dive into his mouth like he belongs there and he doesn’t give a shit about why they shouldn’t be doing this anymore, just stands on his tiptoes and kisses back with the same desperate, bruising strength Blake is using to take the air from his lungs and make him forget he needs that instead of _this_ to live.

Soon Blake is picking him up by the thighs and Adam goes willingly, encircling the country singer’s hips with his legs after climbing him like a fucking tree, and they don’t have time for this but they pay no attention to the knocks on the door.

The only thing that seems to sober Blake up enough to stop is taking Adam’s t-shirt off and noticing just how thin he’s become, how there’s only bones and tendons where there was muscle before, when Adam wasn’t busy ignoring the wishes of his heart.

“Guys, I’m barging in there in five minutes if you don’t come out,” Carson calls through the door, not exactly pissed but final.

Blake looks at him, eyes sad and full of regret, and Adam kicks him and pushes him away, crouching to get his t-shirt back and pulling it hastily back on so he can bolt out of there.

He dashes past Carson and doesn’t stop until he’s at the parking lot, unlocking his car with shaky fingers and speeding away before anyone can even think about stopping him.

Blake and Gwen aren’t even living together but he feels like a home wrecker anyway, like the worst kind of scum you can find on Earth.

His phone doesn’t stop buzzing but he doesn’t pick up any call, not even—and especially not—Blake’s.

He wishes he could just crash his car and be done with everything.

***

He’s not sure how many hours he spends lying on the cold floor of his bathroom while hiding his face in his hands and trying not to scream but eventually he calms down and falls asleep right there, waking up with enough courage to listen to the only voicemail he should not overlook.

“He told me he was in love with someone else, back when we started seeing each other,” Gwen confesses and she doesn’t sound as mad as Adam thought she would, just a bit hollow and resigned, the way one gets when their heart gets broken, with or without warning, “I thought, hey, I’ll help him get over whoever it is. He’ll love me, I know he will,” she laughs quietly and it’s not even bitter, just the tiniest bit hysterical like she’s realizing all the songs and love in the world can’t make people feel the way you want them to, “And he did, and it was great, but it wasn’t meant to last. I made him happy, now’s your turn.”

He calls Blake right after, raising to his feet even though his knees wobble and threaten to give out.

He turns on the speaker, washing his face as he waits for the stupid country son of a bitch to pick up.

“What?” Blake spits out, like it’s been long enough he’s changed his mind and decided to blame Adam for everything.

“We suck,” Adam tells him, matt-of-fact, “And she’s way too good for you.”

“So maybe we deserve each other, that what you’re saying?” the older man questions, his twang thick enough to get a smile out of him even through the phone, “I don’t know why you’re alone when you can sweet-talk someone like this, bud, it’s a real mystery.”

“Oh go to hell,” Adam sniffs, scowling at his iPhone, “Just come on over, okay.”

He doesn’t say _I need you here_ but Blake seems to hear it anyway, scrambling for his keys as he hangs up and promises he’ll be there in twenty.

***

Blake kisses him delicately when Adam opens the door for him, doesn’t even wait to be all the way inside to peck his forehead, his brow, his shoulders and just about every inch of skin he can reach without undressing Adam or turning things unnecessarily steamy too fast.

“I was so sure you’d say something,” Blake admits, his forehead pressed close against Adam’s, sounding more than a bit ashamed, “I thought there was no way you’d just give up if you wanted me too.”

Adam snorts, stares up at him while trying not to take seriously the fact Blake actually thought he could be that much of an asshole.

“I saw that you were happy and I liked you happy,” he says, quiet, “I just, I didn’t like it wasn’t me who made you feel that way and I wanted you, sure, you have no idea how bad, but—“ he shrugs, hides his face on Blake’s shoulder when he realizes that he can’t say it, not so soon.

 _But I loved you more_.

Blake’s breath gets caught in his throat. Adam feels it since they’re flushed together enough to get every minute change in each other, and he wonders if he figured it out, wonders if it really would be so bad to say it back when Blake already admitted he loves Adam enough to let go of something wonderful just for the chance to have him by his side.

“I hurt you,” Blake says, voice tight, and Adam shakes his head, curls his fingers around the taller man’s neck to make him understand it wasn’t like that, but Blake still presses a kiss to his lips that’s too sweet to be anything but an apology he’s not worthy of.

He even manages to turn on the stereo one-handed and sways Adam’s body gently between his arms, following the soft cadence of the music so effortlessly Adam can’t help but feel charmed and give in.

The mock-anniversary date the show made them film for season 10 has nothing on this.

“Who knew you could actually dance, cowboy, I’m surprised,” he whispers, teasing, and Blake chuckles against his hair.

He really tries to reel it in but he bursts out laughing when the mellow song the station was playing changes to the decidedly too romantic lyrics of Elvis Presley’s Can’t help falling in love and Blake just keeps going, expecting Adam to follow his lead like this isn’t the sappiest thing they’ve ever done.

“You couldn’t help yourself, huh,” Blake chides him, “You just had to go and ruin the moment.”

“The moment?” Adam chokes, trembling with laughter, “Oh god, tell me you didn’t plan this.”

“Maybe I should have,” the country singer notes. chuckling, “I missed seeing you smile like this so much, it would’ve been worth it.”

He kisses Adam again before he can complain and there’s little of the urgency of the first few heated, forbidden kisses they shared at the studio and a lot more of things that should probably scare him shitless but only make him grin cheerfully between kisses for now.

He stirs Blake towards the sofa behind him, straddling his lap the second he’s down and shivering when that puts his neck at the perfect height for Blake to suck marks into his skin, holding onto his arms with eyes closed and heart beating wildly in his chest.

His hands have no problem unbuckling Blake’s belt by feel alone and he pants, blinking up at the ceiling when it turns out he’s very fucking nervous instead of absolutely game for this as he usually is for sex because this is it, this is the only chance he’s probably gonna get to convince Blake he made the right choice by letting Gwen go.

The country singer smooches his cheek, takes hold of both of his hands to entwine their fingers together and keeps them between their chests, nuzzling Adam’s nose like that’s all he’s ever wanted to do.

“Your heart is beating really fast,” he murmurs and he doesn’t say _you’re scared aren’t you_ but he has to know Adam is because he rocks them back and forth gently and barely pecks Adam’s lips every now and then as they stare at each other through half-lidded, misty eyes.

It’s a stupid moment to get shy but he flushes anyway when it feels like even the smallest caress of Blake’s skin on his has a direct line to his heart instead of being just something physical, something that’s just meant to warm him up and spike until he’s coming from a good combo of contact in all the right places.

“Shhh,” Blake shushes him, kissing his fingertips before pushing Adam off of him and sliding to the floor so he can kneel between the lead man’s parted legs, “Relax, honey. Let me make you feel good.”

He gasps as he raises his arms for the taller man to take off his t-shirt, arching and trembling when Blake kisses his chest as if every inch of him deserved attention even the new tattoos he’s made fun of more than once, stretching just a little bit up to kiss Adam soundly on the lips whenever the noises he’s making become too choked.

Eventually he takes him out like he’s a treasure, index finger rubbing the pre-come over his head deftly as Adam clutches the couch cushions and tries not to close his legs so Blake can’t make him feel like he’s going to burst out of his body anymore.

Blake lets go of him for a moment, thankfully, crawling back on top of him to seemingly try and suck the anxiety out of his soul through his mouth and Adam decides as he’s pulling the shirt off of those broad shoulders that he can do this as long as dusk robs them of the little light they had to see one another and Blake can’t look at him without squinting, without having to guess exactly how hooked, how crazy Adam is for him.

Kicking off their shoes and jeans is tricky but they manage and he whines when his entirely too intent lover kisses his way down Adam’s back, making him close his legs involuntarily as his lips seal over the dimples right over his ass.

He’s on all fours, leaning over the arm of the couch, and it’s so ridiculous that he’s refusing to open up the last bit for Blake but he can’t help it, tense from the top of his head down to his toes as he shakily keeps his stance and waits for Blake to complain about what a lousy lay he’s being.

The older man latches on to his sack instead, licking Adam’s balls like they’re dripping honey instead of sweat, and he moans so loudly he has to tuck his face against his arm as Blake literally works him open with clever touches until he can finally reach between Adam’s cheeks and blow warm breaths over his hole.

He doesn’t kiss him there, just rubs him tirelessly with his thumbs as Adam’s breath hitches and his body seems torn between pressing back and shying away from the intimacy of it.

He grasps back blindly with a hand when Blake hesitates in thrusting in, gripping him firmly as his hips finally do what they’re supposed to and move in teasing, undulating rolls so that the tip brushes wetly against his crack.

“Don’t get shy on me now, babe,” he rasps, chest heaving as he ventures a look over his shoulders and catches Blake staring at him, wide-eyed and bare in both skin and desire, so much that Adam can even tell how gone he is in the dark.

He hasn’t even looked at Blake and how well-endowed he surely is when his dick is already catching on his rim, making him squirm and whimper as he’s suddenly stretched wide around his width and it hurts like a motherfucker but the heat of Blake’s hips flushed against his and his arm weaving around his shoulders to pick him up so they’re touching from knees to neck makes up for it, turns the burn into something amazing he can’t believe he’s been doing without until now.

Blake fucks about as good as he sings—or maybe even better—in well-timed, sure strokes that have Adam panting loudly and letting out strangled, shocked moans whenever his bigger lover slams in just right and hits a spot inside of him that turns him into a wanton mess.

He clamps around him as they move in counterpoint together, the familiar rhythm of sex coming naturally to him even with the trepidation still squeezing his heart, and he scrambles to take a hold of his dick when the stuttering of Blake’s hips lets him know he’s close.

He blinks, jaw slack and body still charged, as Blake finishes deep in him in such a hot, unrepentant way it pushes him right over the edge, grunting loudly and gripping Adam’s hipbones confidently as if he’s been made for him to fuck into.

Blake sighs afterward, long and worn out, and Adam smiles a little as he feels the older man’s nose brushing his nape, tilting his head to peck Blake’s arm when it goes back around his neck.

The country singer surprises him again by hauling him to his lap after pulling out.

He stretches his hand to turn on one of the lamps slowly and Adam doesn’t stop him, lets Blake look into his bleary eyes as if that could help him understand all the things the front man isn’t saying anytime soon.

“You were great,” he praises, cupping Blake’s face and focusing on the side of this thing between them that doesn’t feel so raw he’ll bleed from it, “Really fucking amazing, pun intended.”

Blake chuckles but doesn’t look deterred at all, taking one of Adam’s hands to press a kiss to his palm.

“You don’t have to hide from me, darling,” he drawls, entirely too solemn for the afterglow of their first time, “This is it for me too, I promise you.”

Adam opens his mouth but closes it, burying his face in the crook of the taller man’s neck as his face heats again over something that has nothing to do with the feeling of Blake’s seed slowly leaking out of him.

He kind of hates but also loves how perceptive Blake can be.

He kisses the taller man’s neck in an apology his lover doesn’t seem to need and lets the warm hope Blake insists on kissing on his forehead calm him down enough to let go of his negativity at least for a little while.


	25. with toys

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> to quote daniel radcliffe on snl, "i tried therefore no one should criticize me."
> 
> (i wanted angst okay i'm sorry)

He’d bought the thing online a week ago, didn’t put a rush in the delivery since it was mostly a spur-of-the-moment decision he almost forgot about minutes afterwards.

They were rehearsing with their teams and waiting for the lives of the new season to start so it was the perfect opportunity to enjoy spending a little extra quality time with his boyfriend.

He didn’t even think the deed could backfire so spectacularly on him.

Why would Adam get upset about him buying a vibrator, of all things? It wasn’t like there were handcuffs and a whip attached to it.

And yet coming into the front man’s house after playing with the dogs for a bit was like going into a war zone, one where the bomb was shaped like the goddamn worst idea Blake had ever had.

“What the fuck is this?” Adam asked, voice loud and strained.

“Adam—“

“You got bored of our sex life already, is that it?” the lead man pressed, throwing the unopened box of the sex toy into the trash can forcefully, “Well then, you can go back to chasing tail for all I care, you sick son of a bitch.”

Blake blinked, blindsided, and watched the man he’d grown so close to paling and recoiling from him instead of getting excited with the prospect.

“Okay,” he said, quiet and as gentle as he was able to. He still didn’t get how he’d managed to scare Adam, one of the bravest and most unrepentant people he knew, into lashing out like that but at the moment his only priority was to fix this, “I’m sorry, honey, it was a stupid idea, alright? Let’s forget about it.”

Adam threw in a stuttered, shaky breath and held on to his own arms, frowning and looking at him as if the country singer was a threat he hadn’t even considered up until that point.

It broke Blake’s heart even more than the harsh words, even more than the fact Adam kept stepping away from him slowly in the direction of the door.

“Get out,” the younger man spat out.

“Adam, don’t,” he pleaded, standing stock still so he wouldn’t make what was awful already worse, “I didn’t mean to upset you. I’d never do something that could hurt you like this on purpose, you know that.”

“I’m not upset!” Adam screamed, “I just thought you liked me enough not to need stuff like that ever so excuse me if I’m a little disappointed right now!”

Blake rubbed his face with a hand. It was just a split second but it was enough for Adam to get out of his sight.

He found him stumbling into the living room, huddling behind the couch as if that would be enough for the larger man not to catch him.

“Go away, I don’t want to see you,” it was a whispered plea this time, not a yelled, desperate order, and Blake decided to find a middle ground after reaching out and making Adam flinch without even touching him yet.

He stood up and went back to the kitchen, taking out the trash as he bit his lip and felt his heart shrinking like a clenched fist with the image of Adam making himself small and covering his face with both hands, rocking himself back and forth soundlessly in an attempt to calm down.

He walked up to Adam again, stopping a couple of steps from him to crouch and try to talk to him one more time, “I want to stick around for a bit, make sure you’re a little better before leaving. Would that be alright, darling?”

Adam let out a sound that was somewhere between a laugh and a sob and suddenly Blake had an armful of trembling, frightened pop singer.

“Sorry, I’m sorry,” his little lover offered, tucking his face against Blake’s neck, his soft hair tickling his chin in a way that was soothing and heartening all in one.

It wasn’t often that Adam let himself be comforted and held, even when they were alone. He was too independent and proud for that and Blake both loved and hated that about him.

He put his arms around his boyfriend and sat on the floor, nosing into Adam’s hair as he took as much comfort from the front man curling into his lap as he did from the apology.

“’s alright,” he absolved, soft and loving, “You’ve always been enough for me, Adam, and you’re always gonna be. I won’t go around buying that kind of stuff anymore, I promise.”

“You’re so stupid,” Adam replied, voice clogged but body comfortable against his, “It wasn’t—it wasn’t even your fault but okay. Thanks, babe.”

Blake looked up and thanked his lucky stars this hadn’t escalated even more than it already had, holding Adam tight as the younger man caught his breath and stopped shaking slowly as if still caught in a memory of past times that weren’t half as good and caring as the ones they’d shared.

***

He didn’t ask about it.

Hell, he didn’t even ask what Adam was doing going through his things when he found the little gift Blake innocently thought they could enjoy together.

There was a part of him that wanted to push, that felt like this was something he should know if they were ever gonna make it in the long run, but he’d always been people smart and chose to give it time.

If he should know, then he was gonna know eventually and that was it.

***

Adam still yielded and melted to his touch.

They made love at every chance they got but suddenly how wide open Adam’s eyes always were when they were joined and writhing together didn’t seem like a coincidence, more of a necessity coupled with the gut feeling Blake had that someone—boy or girl or both—had taken advantage of his trust in bed at some point or another.

It made anger bubble in his very veins, to think of Adam getting hurt in such a way, but he still didn’t mention it.

They sadly weren’t in the stage of a relationship where they’d share skeletons in their closets so all he could do was wait they’d get there.

***

 _‘Got a surprise for you, cowboy,’_ Adam texted him, the little shit knew Blake was just finishing a meeting with his record company and not even the trite joke of ‘sexting with his girlfriend’ he got for the bitten-off groan he let out was enough to ruin the good mood that put him in.

It was all he could do not to run every red light he came across as he rushed back to his rental house.

***

“Hope you don’t mind I let myself in,” his boyfriend called from the bedroom huskily.

Blake practically ran to him, throwing the door open to reveal the man who was still the sexiest one alive in his opinion in nothing but boxers and a red, silky blindfold over his eyes.

He was sitting on the side of the bed; chin raised and lips parted as he waited for Blake to take him, fingers barely clutching the covers on his sides, shoulders squared in determination.

“Oh, sweetheart,” he breathed, swaying in place as if he’d just been punched in the gut, “You don’t have to—“

“I trust you,” Adam cut him off, stubborn but somehow unbelievably sweet, “I shouldn’t have yelled at you and said those things, baby, and I want to make it up to you.”

“Adam—“

“Blake, please,” his partner encouraged, tilting his head slightly as if searching for him, “Touch me.”

He did, kneeling between his lover’s spread legs to cup his face and push the blindfold up to his forehead so he could look into those pretty hazel eyes framed with dark, long eyelashes that he loved so much and check this was something Adam wanted instead of something he thought Blake needed to stick around longer.

“No one’s ever been so good to me,” Adam told him in a whisper, hands holding Blake’s own over his cheeks as they kept their eyes locked, “So you can have me, any way that you want.”

Blake smiled warmly, pecking his lips and lingering to breathe the same air that Adam exhaled for a long moment. He kissed him some more then, keeping his own eyes open to catch Adam’s flickering close and remaining like that, his body exposed but loose with trust and a little extra thing he didn’t want to name yet that made his heart soar.

“It was just an add popping up and me being impulsive and dumb, hun, nothing else,” he explained, nuzzling Adam so he would look at him again, “Not a fantasy that could be a deal-breaker, not that such a thing could exist when it comes to you and me.”

He felt more than heard his partner’s sigh of relief and allowed himself to be pulled onto the bed over Adam when he rolled on his back, thighs clasped securely around Blake’s hips after tugging him up.

“Hmm, so I guess you don’t want me like this?” he asked, a playful smirk taking over his slightly damp, pink lips, an eyebrow raised in all but challenge, “Bummer.”

He looked at Blake from under his lashes, which he damn well knew always got the older man going, and that was as far as his brain made it.

He groaned lowly, tugging the blindfold back in place as he surged to kiss his lover hotly, his hands scrambling to get rid of the many layers of clothes he still had on next.

Adam helped him out, deft fingers unbuckling his belt and unzipping his jeans while Blake yanked both his jacket and shirt off, throwing them to the floor messily before hauling himself up just long enough to kick off his boots and toss his pants over them.

The lead man was waiting for him on the mattress, chest heaving as he tried to reach for the taller man without seeing him. Blake took his hands in his and guided his arms around his back, letting Adam’s fingers feel the muscles there working as he leaned down and took his mouth again and they ground their hips against each other, Adam’s legs wrapping up around him in an instinctive, sensual way with no help whatsoever.

He moved them up once he’d gotten rid of their underwear, dragging Adam’s naked form to his lap as they were still tangled together, his lips brushing the skin of Adam’s arm teasingly, his fingers venturing in the valley between his pretty lover’s cheeks.

He wasn’t sure which made Adam shiver more but he enjoyed their combined loud panting, wondering if it was even louder and better for Adam with his sight not there to distract him from it, if the way heat seemed to sizzle on their skin everywhere they touched was even more irresistible and blatant that way.

Always the obsessive, perfectionist type his little, giving lover had already stretched himself open so two of Blake’s thick fingers slid right in and they both groaned, Blake’s approval muffled by his teeth lightly nipping Adam’s shoulder.

“Gosh, Adam, I don’t deserve you,” he breathed, awed, showering the pop singer’s neck with little kisses as his hands gripped his bony, perfect hipbones and positioned Adam for him to thrust up in one fluid, easy roll of his hips.

“Fuck me now, g-get cheesy later,” Adam stammered, voice a hoarse, breathy mess and he planted his heels firmer on the bed, legs crossed to nestle Adam’s smaller body as he slammed home deeper and harder, finally getting one of those whines he adored out of his boyfriend’s lips, “Yeah, fuck, Blake, _yes_ —“

Adam’s fingertips dug into his shoulder blades as he drove into him, his hips rocking along with his in the exact rhythm Blake picked for them and not a tad faster.

Their skin got hotter and sweatier as they moved together, Adam’s dick swaying and dribbling pre-come between them as they fucked, and Blake felt confident enough to spice things up a little bit and pulled out fast to flip Adam over and push him onto his knees and elbows to slide into him again.

Adam’s moans cut off just for a few seconds, his disorientation lasting only until Blake found his prostate again to hit right on, and he relaxed quickly, arching back against him as he almost shouted out in pleasure with Blake’s hand fondling him with easy familiarity and impeccable timing with his thrusts.

Blake liked manhandling him when there was no way Adam could tell what was going on a little bit too much, he had to admit that, but then again maybe his partner did too because they both finished not long after that, Adam’s come ruining his sheets while he spilled deep inside him and made him suck in a long, startled breath.

It wasn’t often that Blake lost control like this, only if they’d somehow spent too much time apart, and he almost came a second time—soft and without even a hand on him—when he heard the shameless, pleased sound Adam let out at feeling his seed leaking out of him after Blake pulled out.

“You liked that, huh?” he asked, turned on and rowdy, fingers already curling inside Adam’s hole to scoop more of his come out and smear it over the inner side of his thighs, “Gorgeous, dirty little thing that you are.”

Adam shuddered but stayed put and let Blake decide whether they’d had enough or not, just turning his head in the way he knew meant he wanted Blake’s lips on his stat.

He kissed the lead man on his cheekbone, right over the silky rim of the blindfold, and acquiesced, feeling Adam smiling into the kiss as soon as their lips touched.


	26. boring sex

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is trash and i'm sorry but at least i'm writing again.
> 
> thanks to everyone who sent me asks/comments encouraging me to keep going, they mean a lot :)

It’s probably a mistake, and Adam fucking _knows_ this, but he lets Blake back him into the door of his trailer and kiss him anyway.

A large part of him stops thinking of it as a mistake right away.

It’s very much impossible to call it anything other than thrilling, the way Blake is kissing him like it’s his last day on Earth and he’d regret not doing this with him for ten lifetimes if he didn’t brush Adam’s lips with his in something that’s definitely a kiss but also a tease of one and he can’t help but stand on his tiptoes and chase the man’s infuriating but soft mouth to get more of a feel of it, to get more of Blake’s taste on his tongue because he literally had no idea it was something he needed this much.

A weight seems to lift from Blake’s whole frame when Adam reaches up, kissing back in the same kind of apocalyptic mindset the country singer is exuding, and Adam has to admit it—it is kind of the end of the world as they know it.

There’ll be no going back from this, and he knows this too. Whether he’s going to be just another notch in Blake’s bedpost or they’re going to have something else, something sweet and soft and lasting but tough and challenging and bittersweet too, there’s just no way in hell he’s not grabbing the chance to have more of this electric feeling that reaches down to his toes, of this warm bubbling thing erupting in the middle of his chest that seems to replace everything else he’s ever felt and wow, is he fucked or what?

One kiss. That’s apparently what he’s always needed to realize that yeah, he’s head over heels over his dumbest friend, one Blake Shelton, and isn’t that fucking perfect?

He grabs Blake’s nape like he _owns_ it, tugging at those curls that are at least three different colors but are surprisingly soft anyway, and pushes into Blake’s chest with all of his weight because he can’t literally hold himself up any longer.

Not that Blake seems to mind. His arms migrate from Adam’s shoulders to his waist with an ease that shouldn’t be possible since they have their eyes closed and he can’t be that familiar with Adam’s body just yet, no matter how many times he’s hugged him in the past.

And he’d bet Blake’s next move will involve some horizontal surface or either of them on their knees sucking the other like they’ve done it a hundred times but he—well, he’s a little pleased about it, he would’ve lost if he did.

Blake nuzzles into his hair, which is pink again but also a little blond, like that’s the ultimate prize of having Adam Levine close and willing and maybe even trembling a little because he doesn’t know what the hell they’re doing but oh God, he doesn’t want to stop.

The country star caresses Adam’s back slowly, confidently, and it’s as if they got all the time in the world to enjoy each other, to feel each other, and he may or may not let out an embarrassing whimpery, broken thing of a sigh.

He gets a low rumble as reply, right within Blake’s chest but strong enough for him to feel it, and it’s pleased and a bit relieved too so he smiles up at him and doesn’t stop, not even through the kisses, not even when Carson himself has to come and drag their asses back to tapping.

Blake smirks the whole time, looking every bit as a man with a secret he’s not going to share.

Adam ducks his head, trying not to blush like a goddamn teenager at noticing that the country singer stares at him in the exact same way he’s always done.

He wonders if he’s that easy to read too, if people can tell just how very dear Blake is to him, if each and every jab and insult just sounds like pet names and foreplay to everyone.

***

It’s funny, it really is, that it takes them a little over a week to actually sleep together.

Blake stays over every single night since their first kiss, but they’re both too exhausted after working with their teams to do more than kissing and groping before kind of passing out in a tangle of limbs that’s strangely comfortable and soothing.

It’s Sunday, they have nowhere to be, and he’s just finished his routine of sun salutation when Blake kind of tackles him, enthusiastic and loud enough to have Bones and Charlie joining him in squeezing Adam to his yoga mat.

He laughs through a full-body shiver as Blake latches onto his neck, trying to gently push his dogs away as he makes room for the other man between his legs since it looks like the country star will go up in flames if he doesn’t get his hands on him soon.

“Can we, like, get to a bed first?” he suggests, biting back a moan at feeling just how excited Blake is to see him right against his groin, “Or are you afraid you’re gonna fall asleep on me, grandpa?”

Blake retaliates by gripping his ass under his pants just this side of too tight, chuckles when Adam’s hips lift on their own accord to grant him better access, “I have faith you’ll be enough to keep me awake, little guy, but I don’t know, I’m probably giving you too much credit. Pretty sure your sexual prowess is overrated.”

“You’re such a jerk,” Adam shakes his head, tries not to squeak and fails miserably as Blake gets them both up and refuses to let Adam touch the floor with his feet, keeping his big hands hot and proprietary on his thighs.

Instead of giving each other more shit, they spend the trip to Adam’s bedroom kissing so much they forget to breathe a little.

He’s lightheaded as he opens Blake’s stupid button-down—and seriously, it’s too fucking early to even think about wearing one, why does he even has it on—and pulls him on top of him as they land on his bed by his belt loops.

Blake resumes trying to lick into Adam’s soul as he’s kicking off his boots, and he’s really good at this, even though Adam’s so hard he’s pretty sure he’ll start crying if they don’t get it on soon, that’s how little he needs to be seduced.

His body though, it seems pretty on board with Blake’s pace, and he can’t really be bothered to take his hands off of the taller man’s back after they’re finally, gloriously naked and pressed together.

“Blake—“ Adam breathes out like a prayer, like a plea, he doesn’t fucking _know_ , as Blake gives his bare leg a drawn-out, possessive caress, touching the inside of his thigh like he’s trying to memorize the feel of Adam’s skin against his palm, “Just—“

 _Just fuck me already_ , he almost says, like it’d make any difference if Blake does, like Adam isn’t already _his_ in pretty much every way there is.

He arches beneath his lover, chest heaving with every sensation and feeling he’d do better keeping to himself, when Blake finally touches him, hand firm and quick in stealing filthy, breathy sounds from Adam’s mouth.

“Adam, I really want—“ the idiot croaks, clearly desperate for a thing Adam is so very willing to give him he shouldn’t even be asking, fingertips grazing the puckered skin of his hole softly.

He replies by hooking his right leg on Blake’s elbow, hips pushing into the touch, and stares right into those incredible blue eyes of his, dares him to even doubt for a second this isn’t something that Adam wants too.

Not needing any more encouragement, the country singer produces a tube of lube from somewhere near Adam’s head, and maybe it should be insulting, how sure he was the front man was going to welcome him between his legs like this, but Adam is too busy bruising Blake’s lips with his own to feel anything that isn’t desire and need.

Blake preps him like he’s done this a thousand times or maybe it’s Adam’s body the one that makes it so easy, opening up to him like this is what they were meant to do all along, and the way he cradles Adam’s neck as he’s pushing in completely contradicts the dirty pumps he’s jerking Adam off with to keep him interested even though it hurts enough to blindside him for a minute.

But then the lube and possibly Blake’s hips make it smooth and nice, enough for Adam to roll his hips up and meet Blake in the middle, panting something wild at feeling him so big and warm and deep inside.

Blake lets go of his dick, hands curling on Adam’s hipbones, and leans his forehead against his as he’s experimenting with the angle of his thrusts. Adam squeezes him between his legs tighter, ankles crossing in the small of Blake’s back for him to just keep going and touch him again.

He moans, loud and long and shocked, when whatever Blake was looking for seems to ignite electricity all over his spine only for pleasure to pool in his belly.

“That’s it,” Blake groans, and Adam feels his cheeks growing impossibly hotter at feeling the way his body clenches around Blake’s length, making the friction between them even more enticing and addicting, “That’s it, darling, eat me right up, this is all for you—“

Adam whimpers then for a whole different reason, some combination of Blake’s maddening twang and the dirty talk really doing it for him, and his nails dig into strong shoulder blades as they pick up the rhythm and get lost in the pressure of their hips together.

For a long, amazing moment it feels like they can do this forever, like there’s nothing else in the world but the heat between them.

His orgasm takes him by surprise. He shouts through it, arches so much as his body and mind are assaulted by pleasure that his neck pops, and then he whines through Blake’s own too, because of fucking course the asshole forgot to roll on a condom and comes deep and hot inside of him.

He’d complain, really, if it wasn’t because the sensation seems to stretch his climax to the point he’s absolutely incoherent by the time Blake pulls out and murmurs throaty nonsense that doesn’t sound like an apology at all.

He shuts whatever his lover was saying with a messy, sated kiss. Blake hums and settles on Adam’s back, nosing the sweat on his nape in a way that can be read as fond but that Adam doesn’t want to ponder on.

Secretly, he thinks Blake can fuck him raw whenever he damn pleases.

***

He’s bent over Blake’s couch, and he’s gotten rather good at this, at taking Blake’s cock in different positions and places and still sound like it’s the first time and he’s hooked on this thing they’ve discovered together.

Blake pounds into him frantically, like only if he snaps his hips hard enough he’ll get to keep Adam for good, and he’s gotten great at this too because Adam can barely hold on, his legs wobbly with the waves of pleasure rocking him.

There are whispered praises, promises and confessions even, but he’s not dumb enough to believe even his own, let alone Blake’s.

The minute sex stops being this exciting, Blake is dumping him and he won’t miss the charming country son of a bitch or so he likes lying to himself.

Adam will still have him around, won’t he? It’s just his big hands on him, his perfect mouth, his dick, that he’ll have to make do without.

So he waits for the boring sex to start and tells his heart it’ll be all right.

***

It’s been two months and they still haven’t talked about—well, anything. It’s just like before, except for the times they feel like fucking each other’s brains out which isn’t even every time they’re alone.

It makes it confusing for Adam, how it looks like they’re in a relationship they’ve never acknowledged, but he’ll take what he can get and it’s not like Blake is being cruel or anything.

It’s not like he knows Adam is stupidly in love with him instead of just going along for the ride while Blake is still on the rebound from Gwen.

“Hey, sweetheart,” Blake says, getting on his knees in front of where Adam was watching a rerun of the last Lakers game. He grasps the lead man’s thighs, thumbs caressing him through the fabric of his sweatpants, and leans forward to kiss him on the mouth, open-mouthed and naughty.

Adam peeks at the bulge between Blake’s legs between kisses, wonders if this is it, the moment he’s been waiting for in which Blake will just fuck him because he’s hard and Adam’s there so he might as well, not because he actually wants to.

Then again, maybe it won’t be, it’s hard to tell with how well Blake sucks him, tonguing the head and teasing him by swallowing around him as he deep throats him while his fingers make quick work of stretching Adam to accommodate him.

Adam’s eyes roll back in his head as he puts his legs on Blake’s shoulders and his lovers bottoms out. Everything about it is great; how there’s no distance between them, how they can kiss as Blake fucks him languidly like he’s got all the time in the world to turn Adam into a wanton mess and it doesn’t make sense, how he seemed to be in such a hurry to get off but is now taking his time to take Adam high and keep him there for as long as he wants.

“Oh god,” he practically sobs, and he bites into the crook of Blake’s neck to stop himself from whispering more embarrassing things when kissing him is not enough, his hand on the country singer’s neck pulling so hard at his hair he’s sure he’ll end up with a handful of it.

“Adam, fuck,” Blake groans into his ear, hips speeding up, their sweaty skin kind of gliding against one another, “I love you, I love you so much—“

He moans, somehow making it past the giant lump in his throat, and relishes, fucking _makes_ Blake come inside him again, like he’s done every time they’ve been together.

If Adam was smart instead of fucking stupid, he’d tell Blake exactly how he feels about him when the words and their weight couldn’t be blamed on the heat of the moment and have the older man running for the hills before he forgot how to exist outside of the cocoon of Blake’s arms.

And yet, that’s exactly what he knows he won’t do.

***

“Mm,” he sighs, spreading his legs once he recognizes Blake’s drawl and the smell of his aftershave.

He’s exhausted but ridiculously pleased Blake still wants him even after the band touring and them being apart for far longer than whatever it is they have can survive.

He’s lying on his stomach in bed. Blake leaves a trail of kisses down his spine and he’s sleepy enough to speak without fear of overstepping his bounds.

“Fuck, I missed you,” he admits because they’re in bed about to have sex and it should be safe, all things considered, “I missed you so much.”

Blake kisses his shoulder before finding his mouth and shutting Adam right up, soft and slow instead of urgent and hot.

Alarms go off in his head when his lover just curls around him like a big, contented cat instead of undressing him. He’s warm and tender, a perfect fucking gentleman, and Adam doesn’t even know anymore.

His heart thumps madly in his chest, like it wants to flee before it’s too late, and this isn’t a mistake, it feels too right to be one, but it isn’t a relationship either and oh, when it’s over, there won’t be nothing but ashes where there used to be a field of blooming feelings that were never supposed to be there in the first place.

***

He blinks awake to find big blue eyes already looking at him.

He blushes, fears Blake can see right through him and is about to mock him for mistaking this—arrangement—between them as anything else than good chemistry and energy to burn together.

Whatever the older man sees, he likes; he pulls Adam to the bathroom and they take a bath long enough for the water to get cold.

Blake warms them back up by fucking Adam against the wall, holding him up with grunts and dirty praise like he’s worth the extra effort.

Adam closes his eyes, tucking his head under his lover’s chin, and thinks this is okay. This is _fine_.

He’s fine.

***

The next time Blake saunters into his house, he’s trying to scribble some lyrics and really not in the mood to get his heartstrings twisted in a knot he has no hope of untangling.

He pushes the taller man off only for him to laugh and grab Adam by the hips, hauling him off the couch and onto the floor, one of his hands bending the pop singer’s leg and pushing it to the side with no issue whatsoever.

It should be scary, he thinks, how his fellow coach doesn’t seem to respect his wishes but when he looks up there’s a twinkle in Blake’s eyes like he knows Adam isn’t actually capable of saying no to him.

Obviously, this is funny to him.

Fucker.

“Are we playing hard to get now?” he asks, voice raspy and low, and fuck—Adam wants to punch him in the face but also kiss him senseless, “Need a bit of convincing? I can work with that.”

“You’re so fucking rude, I can’t believe you,” Adam babbles just before Blake starts tickling him, of all things, and then he’s wheezing with laughter so much he kind of forgets he’s supposed to make Blake work for it.

He welcomes the kiss Blake presses to his mouth by snaking a leg around his hips, pulling him closer as he parts his lips for him, and it’s only when someone clears his throat that he remembers the guys are in the house and he freezes because this was a secret, right? This isn’t something real he gets to share with his friends.

“Shit,” he murmurs, really wishing he could be less stupid.

Blake rolls them up until he’s sitting on the floor with Adam on his lap, gives him a loud, wet peck on the cheek that makes him squirm before greeting James and Matt who are still gaping at them.

“Wow,” James utters, wide-eyed and speechless, “You want us to leave, Adam? We can come back tomorrow.”

“What? No,” Adam bites his cheek, anger flaring in his chest because fuck if he knows how to explain nothing is really going on between them except several rounds of mind-blowing sex, “We were—we were just—“

Matt smirks, cuts him off with a chuckle before walking back upstairs screaming something that sounds suspiciously like, “Guys! You owe me money!”

“Y’all had lunch yet?” James shakes his head and Blake stands up carefully, leaving Adam back where he found him on the sofa, “I hope you’re in the mood for some barbecue because that’s what I want,” he adds, kissing Adam’s temple before going to the kitchen like a man on a mission, “Be right up!”

“So, Blake, huh?” James points out.

Adam shrugs, tugging his sleeves so they cover half his hands as he ducks his head.

“He’s bored and I’m easy,” he says, because that’s really it.

“Didn’t look that way to me,” his friend says, contrary and nosy, and Adam huffs as he stands up.

“Whatever.”

***

It’s hard to focus with everyone grinning and wiggling their eyebrows at him but they somehow get a little of work done.

Lunch is delicious because of course Blake knows his way around a grill and spends so much time in Adam’s place he knows where everything is so even the table is set when he calls them.

He picks at his food, annoyed because his hands are trembling and his stomach is in knots but Blake is fucking chipper and keeps the guys occupied with jokes and stories from his last gig.

It’s more than Adam has heard him talking in months, possibly ever since this _thing_ started, and it’s not fair, how Blake is acting like they’re together _together_ but Adam has nothing but doubts about everything they've been doing and everything they haven't done too.

He sneaks off the table, walks to the patio to light a cigarette that does wonders to steady his fingers but little to slow the beating of his heart.

He’s curled up in one of the garden chairs when he hears Blake stepping outside, his stupid cowboy boots making it obvious it’s him and not one of his bandmates.

“Leave me alone,” he spits out after a long drag.

“Adam, we need to talk,” Blake insists, somehow managing to sit in the space Adam isn’t taking on the chair.

He sneers, not looking at him as he tries to make himself smaller so they’re not touching as much, “Oh, now you want to talk. Breaking up with me now that shit hit the fan, Shelton? Can’t say I’m surprised.”

“Look at me,” Blake asks, demands really, and Adam stubbornly tucks his chin on his knees, doesn’t give in, “Gosh, I’m not breaking up with you, you idiot. I’ve been in love with you for years, why the hell would I do that?”

He blinks, stunned, almost chokes on the smoke he’s still inhaling as he jumps to look at him, “What? But—“

“I’ve told you, Adam, so many times,” Blake says and Adam’s never seen him so serious in all the time they’ve known each other, “I love you.”

“Yeah,” he sniffs, petulant maybe, but fuck if he cares, “While we were fucking and that's always so convincing.”

“While we were _making love_ ,” Blake corrects, firm and so very certain Adam feels the tip of his ears turning red, “I meant it. And I know you meant it too, darling, so why are we even fighting?”

“Well, excuse me if I didn’t get the memo you stopped sleeping around,” maybe he should’ve, and he’s a little embarrassed about it, so he tries to wriggle away when Blake laughs and pulls him to his lap before they can fall off the chair, kissing his neck with a grin on his stupid face that Adam kind of loves but also wants to wipe off, “Ugh, stop it, I get it, okay?”

“Do you, now?” Blake asks, skeptical but strangely cheerful, “Gotta make sure you do.”

And he does, kissing Adam while cupping his cheeks, lips slotting on his own in ways that shouldn’t be possible.

He holds on to the hands on his face, his heart finally fluttering in the right way, and flips his friends off when the catcalls start on his back.


	27. rough, biting, scratch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was harder than i expected. i apologize. hopefully it doesn't suck so much :(

He’s been visiting Blake in Tishomingo for a week when the man literally drags him to something that’s not quite a high school reunion but it’s close enough to one that Adam feels disgustingly out of place and like every move he makes it’s being rated and judged.

No one can know the real extent of their relationship, not if Blake wants to continue his career as a country artist that is, so he gets introduced as a friend and left to fend for himself while Blake ambles around the honky-tonk and laughs uproariously at some joke or another every now and then.

He huffs in annoyance, turning to the bartender to ask for his tenth—or is it? He’s kind of lost count by now—drink of the night, about to ask the man for the strongest shit he has and double it because fuck, he’s not a child, Blake could’ve left him in his ranch and come here to have fun on his own without torturing him like this, when he feels a hand on his arm and sets his jaw because he absolutely fucking despises when people just assume is okay to touch him.

“Hey,” the stranger drawls and wow, Adam has to look up and then some to see the guy’s face because he’s that tall, taller than his cowboy, “Adam Levine, right? Blake sure has the best of friends. I’m Chad, we used to go to school together, obviously.”

“Obviously,” Adam repeats, surreptitiously trying to free his arm from the big, intrusive hand that doesn’t seem to be taking his tense frame and scowl as anything else than inviting, “Look, Chad, I’m—“

“Absolutely fucking gorgeous,” the strange giant fills in, his smile a million wattage and he’s not—well, he’s not _ugly_ , but Adam’s very much taken, and he’s never been good at noticing other people’s hotness when he’s in love, “Is what you are. Like, holy shit, man, TV and magazines and the internet do you no justice. I’m mad Blake hasn’t bothered to tell me this, I mean, you’d think it’s important, right? Considering I’m his only gay friend from around here.”

He has to admit, he’s kind of flattered this time, for real. The dude’s looking at him like he’s just fallen from heaven or something and it’s been ages since Blake has looked at him like that, like there’s no one else in the world that’s more beautiful to him, and okay—yeah, all right, maybe Adam is a little attention-starved.

Blake’s folks have been around with them more often than not and he’s too drunk to remember the last time they were alone together but not enough not to feel how much he misses it.

“You’re exaggerating,” he says firmly, proud when he doesn’t blush or seems overly touched by the compliments on the outside, “But thanks.”

Chad cocks an eyebrow, challenged or something, and gestures for the bartender to get them a glass of the best whiskey they have.

Adam thinks it would be awfully rude to decline something that just cost the guy at least five hundred bucks so he nods his appreciation and sips a little, closing his eyes when the taste ends up being worth every penny and he can feel the smooth, rich stroke of good alcohol down his throat.

It’s good enough Adam doesn’t even notice the arm perching too close to his hip on the counter until he also has the guy’s mouth whispering in his ear how good of a time he’d show Adam if he let him.

“I’m—“ the lead man kind of squeaks, pushing to his feet so he can get his personal space back, and this time he is blushing.

Damn, but this dude is persistent.

“Straight?” Chad ventures.

Adam is wasted enough to frown and say, “Bi, actually. I was gonna say I’m with someone.”

“Don’t see nobody here with you, sweetheart,” he taunts, “And you look awfully lonely, I gotta say. I could take good care of you.”

“Thanks but no, thanks,” Adam says resolutely, finishing the very expensive drink he doesn’t deserve before he hightails it away from the guy in search of his actual, stupid boyfriend who is definitely not taking good care of him right now, more like the opposite.

Fuck, he’s not having a good time at all.

He finds his personal oaf easily enough and pushes through the crowd to get to him, pressing close to the country singer’s side and stealing a sip of his beer when the conversation dies around them at his arrival.

“Cheers,” he salutes obnoxiously, pretends he doesn’t see Blake glowering at him, scrunching his nose at the taste, “Ugh, this is terrible, man. You know what you should drink? That vintage whiskey they have, Chad bought it for me—“

“Chad?” Blake asks, eyebrows raising in that way Adam knows mean he’s not a happy camper but fuck if he cares because his boyfriend is being _rude_.

“Guilty as charged,” a voice replies before the pop singer can stick out his tongue as only explanation, “Your buddy here is actually kind of shy, it’s really endearing.”

“ _Oh my God_ ,” he hopes he thinks instead of exclaims, hiding his face in Blake’s shoulder as he mutters, “Stop it with the compliments.”

“See?” Chad points out, cheery, and everyone at the table laughs, “C’mon man, help a brother out, tell him I’ll give him a nice ride.”

Adam blinks through his inebriation when he feels Blake’s arm curling possessively around his waist, all but pulling the smaller man up until he’s sitting on one of his thighs instead of the booth.

“I think he already told you he’s not interested, bud, sorry,” Blake says simply and he sounds harmless enough which is disappointing in ways Adam can’t understand at the moment.

He snuggles into Blake some more, tucks his nose right in the crook of his neck, thinking maybe drinking the evening away wasn’t the smartest idea after all.

He hopes his cowboy isn’t too angry at him when they get home. Bromance or not, this can’t look entirely appropriate in the place they’re at.

“I’m so drunk, sorry,” he mumbles, apparently loud enough for their company to hear and laugh at him again.

***

“I don’t even know why the fuck you took me there,” Adam complains, crossing his arms and looking out the window after Blake unceremoniously shoves him into the passenger seat and starts driving his truck home in seething silence, “You left me alone the whole fucking night too, what’s up with that? Chad treated me better than you did, asshole.”

“Maybe you should’ve taken him up on his offer then,” Blake grumbles, sounding so okay with the prospect Adam bites his lip and wills his eyes not to well up, “Since he was so goddamn good to you and all.”

He wipes tears from his cheeks angrily when it turns out he’s too wasted to keep his emotions under control.

“Too bad it’s just you I want,” he grits out and his voice cracks a little which finally seems to get Blake to realize Adam’s really not a happy drunk right now.

“Honey—“ he tries, turning off the engine as his stupid handsome face pinches in worry and something else.

“Shut up,” Adam cuts him off, empowered by some hidden wrath he didn’t even know he felt as he stumbles out of the truck, “I came here to be with you but you’ve spent every single fucking minute with everyone else so I’m done. I’m going home tomorrow.”

He slams the door of the guest room he hasn’t even used right in Blake’s face and feels absurdly vindicated by that.

He kicks off his sneakers, tries to stop weeping like a damn kid who just got his favorite toy broken and falls asleep on top of the covers, hands tucked inside the sleeves of his hoodie.

***

His head is trying to split itself in many tiny, painful pieces when he wakes up but he breathes through it and books a flight to LA for that afternoon on his phone while downing some water that appeared in the bedside table.

It makes him sad, the fact he thought this visit would be like every other time he’s come to Blake’s house and had the time of his life except better because they’ve finally stopped dancing around each other but he was so wrong it’s kind of pathetic.

He’s just finishing his morning yoga when there’s a knock on the door and all the relaxation he accomplished with the exercise flies right out of his body.

He thinks about not letting the other man in but sighs, deciding against it.

It’s the jerk’s house, after all, and he still needs to pack and all his stuff is in Blake’s bedroom.

“Morning,” he greets, breezing past the taller man to collect his things without waiting for a reply.

“Adam, I,” Blake mumbles, carding a hand through his hair that’s already messy since it’s very early and he hasn’t brushed it yet.

Normally, Adam would laugh about how silly he looks but he’s not in the mood so he just keeps bending to look for his clothes.

“I know I screwed up, okay?” his boyfriend acknowledges and that gets him to pause, looking up at him as he kneels by the bed.

His heart constricts as he catches the pained look in the country star’s face. He hates himself a little but he wants to stand up and soothe him, his anger and pride be damned.

“I guess I got scared,” Blake admits, and he knows it must be costing him a great deal to be saying those things so he doesn’t even fight it and gets to his feet to take the big dummy’s hands in his, “You know, this being the first time you’re here after we—“

“You really are the dumbest person I know,” Adam shakes his head, stretching up to kiss a stubbly cheek with a smile, “We’re still the same, you idiot, with the difference we get to do this now too.”

He pecks him again, this time on the corner of his mouth. There’s still a lump of misery in this throat but if Blake is sorry—even though he’s never actually going to say the words, he’s never been good at apologizing—then Adam is going to forgive him.

Blake makes a wounded sort of noise in the back of his throat, hands gripping Adam’s waist to flush him to his bigger frame, and brushes his soft, plush lips on top of his for the three seconds it takes for the front man to cave and cling to his back to start an open-mouthed, hungry kiss.

He has to crane his neck for this angle to work but doesn’t complain as his lover pins him to the closest wall and does his level best to crawl inside Adam by staking an undeniable claim on his mouth.

He moans and shudders when Blake literally uses his teeth, drawing the sharp, metallic taste of blood forth into their kiss and making it sting in a way that has Adam’s head spinning and his fists closing on Blake’s plaid shirt.

“You’re not leaving,” the country artist grunts, more aggressive that’s probably healthy but fuck it if watching him licking blood from his lips isn’t making Adam twitch in his jeans, “You’re not leaving me, Adam.”

“Blake,” Adam blinks up at him, those usually bright blue eyes dark and dangerous, “I wasn’t gonna—“

The taller man pulls him off the wall and uses a foot to make Adam trip, pushing him to land on the bed so forcefully he freezes on the spot and gapes at him, chest heaving.

“Damn right you weren’t,” Blake growls, throwing himself on top of Adam to clasp his chin and tilts it up enough to make Adam gasp in discomfort, “You’re—“

“I’m what? Your _whore_?” Adam asks, defiant and finally snapping out of the shock to fight Blake’s hold on him, “Or just yours, huh? Keep dreaming, jackass.”

There are things he won’t take from anyone and Blake humiliating him and treating him like he’s something to own because he always tops is one of them.

He uses his shin to hit Blake on the side of the head when Blake’s hands on him get bruising and vicious. He bets he’s going to have marks on his neck and his hip after this and it’s probably very fucked up but he kind of likes the idea of having a reminder that what they have is real on his skin for days on end.

Blake’s face twists in something that isn’t rage, and it seems almost animalistic coupled with the elbow he uses to knock the air out of Adam and get back on top of him, this time to leave a trail of hickeys down his neck, digging his teeth into Adam’s flesh more than a couple of times to make him moan and tear up because fuck, he hates himself for liking every goddamn thing this infuriating man does to him.

Adam rips the shirt right off Blake’s body, buttons flying in all directions, and manages to clutch onto his hot, bare skin with enough force to tear it with his blunt nails and leave bloody imprints in exchange of the ones his boyfriend is leaving on him.

The minute their mouths are sealed again, he takes dark pleasure in nibbling into Blake’s bottom lip as the man keeps tugging off his skinny jeans roughly along with his underwear.

He’s so hard he’s leaking but he refuses to let Blake gloat about it; he kicks him off of him to return the favor, driving a knee into his stomach and stripping him from the waist down, making sure his nails scratch all the way down the country singer’s long legs.

His lover grunts low in his chest, practically arching with it, and Adam lets him take off his hoodie and t-shirt hastily before leaning down to bite down on his collarbone hard enough to make him hiss.

“If I don’t want you, you don’t get me,” he stresses, deciding he rather likes the taste of Blake’s blood on his tongue.

Blake smirks, fingers pulling Adam’s head down until his dick bounces on his cheek, smearing it with pre-come, “I know,” he says, hoarse and sure, “But you always want me, don’t you, honey?”

He closes his eyes instead of replying, parting his lips to take Blake in his mouth after the man smacks the tip over it enough times to make his mouth water. His lover wastes no time in snapping his hips up, keeping Adam’s head in place to fuck his face eagerly, making him gag and choke on it enough to have tears streaming down his face.

“Fuck, look at you,” Blake marvels and Adam opens his eyes just in time to catch him involuntarily tossing his head back for a moment, “Wish I could come all over your pretty face,” he grunts, picking up the pace, and Adam hollows his cheeks, his own hips following that same rhythm as he humps Blake’s thigh.

It seems his lover has other things in mind though, since he tugs Adam off of him and throws him back onto the mattress before spitting on his fingers and shoving his hand between his cheeks, pushing a rough, long finger right into him without warning.

Adam pants through it, absently wondering if Blake wants to make him bleed like this too. He struggles half-heartedly against the possibility, Blake’s arm pinning him down effortlessly, and whimpers when a second finger joins the first to stretch him way too fast to be comfortable.

Blake bites into the inside of his thigh and Adam downright cries with it, realizing he’s hurting all over and that it’s about to get worse but that he still loves every bit of it, can’t get enough of the sting on his skin and inside him since that means the throbbing between his ribs gives him a bit of a break.

The taller man removes his fingers and flips him over, forcing Adam’s legs to spread alongside his own so that his dick is lined up to his entrance. It’s only then his heart finally flutters in fear because yeah, this is going to hurt like hell, but it’s too fucking late to stop it.

He screams through it even though Blake actually pauses to pour some lube on himself and in his hole, his partner way too big for this to be pleasant after not enough prep, at least not at first.

The country star fucks him with short, staccato thrusts as Adam sobs and trembles under him, reaching up until he touches the back of Blake’s neck and digs his nails into it. He’s a smart bastard, waiting not so very patiently for Adam’s body to open up but escalating the depth of his thrusts each time he feels it giving way a little more.

It’s only when he’s balls deep and biting into Adam’s shoulder that the pain turns abruptly to a kind of pleasure he’s never felt before, one that takes him so high up he feels his whole body hot and tingling and that he can’t get enough of, his world zeroing in his lover’s length and teeth reaching deep into him.

“Hard—“ he stutters, arching into Blake’s perfect, excruciating pace, “Harder, oh God, more—“

Blake fucking roars with it, groaning long and loud when Adam’s hips roll in counterpoint to his to catch his dick right in and make it slam home all the better, and Adam screams again, eyelashes fluttering as flashes of white dance behind his eyelids.

For all that he complained about being owned, he’s never been taken like this and he loves it; the way the ache touches down to his bones and just makes the pleasure in his belly burn hotter.

“Adam, Christ, I’m—I’m gonna—“ Blake warns him and Adam whines, doesn’t want him to stop so soon but clamps down on him with all he’s got, panting and arching his head onto Blake’s sweaty shoulder when he feels his lover’s dick pulsing and emptying itself in him.

They both stop, breathless and trembling and still holding each other tight enough to hurt, and Adam moans wantonly when seconds tick by and he can still feel Blake hard as a rock inside him.

“Yes, _yes_ ,” he revels when Blake takes a big, shuddering breath and resumes their fucking right where they left it.

Adam’s climax hits him just as his lover is manhandling him into a different position so they can be face to face, his cock painting their bellies white as Adam’s jaw remains slack but moves clumsily to kiss Blake back when the man nips at his lips and licks right into his mouth.

He snaps his legs closed around the taller man’s hips, blinking in awe when he notices he’s barely soft after coming too.

They roll on the bed when Blake’s hips seem to give out and Adam keeps moving, straddles him to keep him nestled between his cheeks and pushing in and out of him quick and dirty, the loud slap of their skin together not faltering for a second.

His cowboy looks wild beneath him, panting and bruising Adam’s hipbones with his fingers, groaning each time the smaller man clenches on him, and he holds on to his broad chest with his nails as he careens them both to the edge.

When they come again, they shout and spasm through it, and Adam is ridiculously glad Blake doesn’t feel like pulling out of him just yet because he’s sure he’s going to fall apart whenever he does.

They’re soft in more ways than one when Adam lifts a hand and gently touches Blake’s scratched cheek with his fingertips, smiling when his lover almost moans at the stimulation.

He does moan when Blake licks and kisses the biggest bite mark he made on the crook of his neck.

“Still thinking about going home with someone else, darling?” Blake drawls, voice about as wrecked as they must look, “Someone who is _good_ to you?”

They stare at each for a long moment before Adam replies, sighing as he feels the country singer’s arms holding him just a little bit tighter, “Told you, I just want you,” he whispers, and means it too, even after what they just did.

Especially after what they just did.

And especially since Blake is finally looking at him like he thinks Adam’s everything he’s ever going to need, like there’s no one else in the whole wide world for him, like Adam is beautiful and perfect and he could spend the rest of his life just staring at him.

Adam smiles and stutters a sigh when Blake curls around him to kiss the top of his head and reach out to pull the covers over them. He winces when the movement upsets the place where they’re joined but honestly can’t bring himself to care about it.

They’ll have bruises and cuts to nurse when they wake up but he’ll wrestle and let Blake rip him apart any day again.

It’ll definitely be worth it.


	28. role playing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> follows up from 'dom/sub'

His breathing hitched as he clasped the collar around his neck, the weight and the texture of it making anticipation burst in his chest in a way he wasn’t sure was totally pleasant.

He’d already shed his trademark t-shirt and his boots, the exposed skin cold and sweaty as he waited in Blake’s living room.

His friend had said—he’d said it was okay for Adam to come to him when he needed to get out of his head, to come to him instead of going to the club and allow whatever handsome random stranger that saw him first to take him home but it’d been almost four weeks since that and Blake hadn’t made one move on him ever since.

The longing he felt alongside the familiar itching under his skin was new. He didn’t want to admit it, to even think about it, but if Blake had changed his mind and rejected him he was going to go down hard.

He didn’t know if he’d recover, if that was the case.

He swallowed as he waited for the tall, handsome country singer to arrive, stilling his hands with great effort not to fidget and deciding to kneel with his head down when he heard the telltale signs of a car parking outside and then speeding off again.

He started trembling just as the front door opened and he shut his eyes tight, berating himself for losing control like this so soon. He needed to behave if he wanted Blake to keep him around and he wanted that more than anything, his heart felt like it was bleeding just imagining Blake found someone better than him, someone who didn’t ruin scenes with stupid feelings or weren’t too eager for their own good.

He heard Blake’s cowboy boots clunking towards him, heard the man’s long fingers turning switches as he came in and heard perfectly the exact moment in which he realized Adam had been waiting for him in the dark.

He took in a big breath and looked up at the man he craved the touch of through his lashes slowly, hating himself when he realized his eyes felt dangerously wet.

It got easier to breathe, if only a little, as soon as he saw Blake’s eyes darkening with lust and his own breathing getting ragged and loud.

“Gosh darn it, just look at you,” the older man said, hoarse and awed, “Being such a good boy, waiting for me to do whatever the hell I want with you.”

Adam nodded desperately, lips parting when Blake’s fingers gripped his chin and his thumb brushed his bottom lip lingeringly, “Please, Master. I need you.”

“Hands behind your back,” Blake commanded easily, pushing his thumb into Adam’s mouth in an unhurried, measured way that told him it was okay for him to flick the fingertip with his tongue and start sucking lightly, “That’s it, honey, that’s very nice.”

He got the message loud and clear; Blake wanted him to be quiet and was going to take things slow to test Adam’s will to submit to him even though he was clearly aching to have him again.

It soothed some deep part in him, the fact his Dom wanted to take his time with him, that he somehow thought Adam was worth plenty of it. He stopped shaking so much, only a freeing, anticipatory shudder slightly going through him as Blake wetted his lips with the saliva his thumb had gathered from him.

The country star gestured for him to follow him to the couch and Adam did on his hands and knees, settling between Blake’s long legs when the man spread them and jutted his hips out to bring attention to the obvious, big bulge beneath the denim, waiting for Adam like a treat there.

“What’s your save word?” Blake asked, unzipping his own jeans and taking himself in hand.

“I—I always just go with red,” he whispered, suddenly embarrassed for not having something more elaborate to offer.

He watched Blake jerking himself off and bit his lip, his eyes fixed on the deft hand and the way it took Blake’s cock in and out of the foreskin so fluidly.

“That’s good,” Blake approved, “What about no-go’s?”

Adam usually had a few kinks he didn’t want to touch with a ten-foot pole but the words died on his lips when his gaze traveled back to Blake’s face.

He felt it like a stab in the heart, how he’d let his friend turned lover, his _Dom_ do just about anything to him. If Blake wanted to cut him open, to choke him until he passed out, to do whatever it was that got him off the best, Adam was going to give that to him.

He shook his head, mouth watering even as he didn’t look at the action between Blake’s legs.

“Adam,” Blake frowned and he flinched because shit, had he really fucked up already? “If we’re gonna do this, we’re gonna do this right so tell me, what don’t you like?”

“I trust you,” he said without thinking, trying to shrug nonchalantly to hide how much he meant that, “Whatever you want, I’ll try it. If I don’t like it, I’ll safe word out of it. I’m not so dumb, you know.”

Blake’s blue eyes went soft, his hand slowing down a little, “All right,” he agreed, voice thick, “C’mere, I want your mouth.”

His lover groaned unrepentantly as Adam took him in, relaxing his jaw as much as he could to get the tip of Blake’s gorgeous cock right in the back of his throat. It tickled, the urge to cough almost too much to bear, but Blake held his head firmly for a moment and he understood that he wasn’t allowed to move just yet so he closed his eyes and got used to the fullness in his mouth, enjoying the weight and the feel of it on his tongue so much he started leaking in his own pants.

Blake reached to the coffee table, poured himself a glass of something that was probably tequila, and made a few phone calls as if his dick wasn’t in Adam’s mouth, hot and hard and perfect.

He canted his hips up, signaling for the younger man to hollow his cheeks and bob his head up and down like he’d been dying to for long minutes. He let Adam get a taste of him for a bit before gripping the back of his neck, the pop rocker opening his eyes just in time to watch Blake begin to fuck his face in earnest.

The look of bliss on his face was the best compliment he’d ever gotten, made the itching almost go away as he felt he was being useful and good to him.

“You were made for this, darling,” Blake drawled, sure and breathless, “Made for my cock to fill you up.”

Adam moaned, a shock of pleasure making him shiver at his Dom’s words, the muffled sound getting an enthusiastic reply as the taller man groaned and rocked faster into his waiting mouth.

His eyes were so wet there were tears clinging to his lashes, making Blake’s face blurry as he tried his best not to gag with the force his lover was using to thrust into his throat. He blinked quickly, despairing to see Blake coming undone because of him, and felt his face get damp as the effort made him cry.

He almost came too when he felt Blake’s dick pulsing, felt his seed going easily down his throat as he sucked him through his orgasm.

The country singer pulled him off of him gently, panting almost as loudly as Adam was gulping air back into his lungs, and smiled at him like Adam was the most precious thing he’d ever found.

He had to bite back a whimper, ducking his head since he couldn’t stand the adoring look on Blake’s face.

“Wait here,” he instructed in a whisper, as if Adam could do anything else.

He ambled out of the room, his footsteps going up the stairs quickly.

He was naked, had his chain in hand when he came back and attached it to the loop in Adam’s collar, tipping his chin up with a finger as Adam licked a bit of come out from the corner of his lips.

“How long?” the taller man asked gruffly, “How long since you’ve done this, you dirty little thing?”

“You said to come to you, Master,” he whispered as answer, looking down so Blake wouldn’t know the front man had only wanted him ever since.

“That I did,” Blake accepted, “Best decision I’ve ever made, too. Strip for me now, honey.”

Adam did, still flushed from their earlier activities, and straddled the country star’s lap when the man patted his legs and spread his knees wider to make room for him, his cock soft and glistening against his thigh.

He arched when Blake’s hands came to rest on the small of his back, fingertips caressing the dimples there reverently, and gasped into a heated kiss that his Dom all but demanded from him, tongue and lips and teeth daring him to follow his lead and not stray from it.

He’d been hard for so long he was woozy with the need to find release, distracted enough to let his hands grip Blake’s arms as he’d been craving to do, panicking for the second it took his lover to grunt into their kiss in clear approval and push his smaller body closer against his.

“Were you a good boy for me?” he questioned, his right hand brushing down to grip one of Adam’s cheeks, his index finger stretching to rub at his entrance, still loose and slick with lube from Adam’s hopeful, thorough prep for this, “Oh, yeah, you were.”

He used the chain to expose Adam’s neck to him, lapping and kissing every spot that made the pop singer melt and whine for more even before he felt Blake’s finger breaching him, circling inside his hole before adding another finger to the mix and got Adam to stiffen, mouth open in a big ‘O’ as he tried not to come just from this.

“You come when I say,” Blake reminded him and he nodded jerkily, eyeing how his Dom’s length was already growing interested again hungrily, “Or you’re not getting this in you, babe.”

“M-Master,” it was almost torture, how Blake crooked his fingers and brushed his sweet spot mercilessly, his other hand moving to grip Adam’s dick in a strong, tantalizing hold that he resisted not to rut his hips into, pushing back to the prodding fingers in him instead, “Please.”

“Shh,” Blake shushed him, “Move those hips for me, darling, I want to see you.”

He couldn’t help but crying again, sobs mixing with strangled moans as he did as he was told. He had no idea how he hadn’t come yet but he knew he was going to do it, that he was going to disappoint Blake and probably get kicked out until he learned to obey.

The sensations running through his limbs, reaching deep inside his belly and making his ribs tight around his lungs, were so intense he felt like he was free falling about to crash hard on the ground the minute his orgasm betrayed just how bad of a lover he was.

His heart was throbbing, beating so loudly in his ears he almost didn’t hear the quiet, soft order, “Now, hun. Let go.”

He came with a stuttered sob, cock jerking in Blake’s hand as it painted the older man’s belly. The country singer’s arms brought him to curl against his chest and he hid his face in Blake’s shoulder, body trembling with aftershocks as his lover petted him patiently, murmuring faint praise against Adam’s sweaty hair.

He let Blake manhandle him to sit on his dick a few minutes later, holding his breath and arching his back as he was filled to the brim in a swift way that promised him he was going to feel his Dom inside for days after this and that just made it better, assuring him that he wouldn’t feel so lonely once Blake was done with him.

The taller man used the chain to tie his arms together, from elbow to wrist, making them bounce helplessly between them as their hips rocked together.

“You look so pretty like this, honey,” Blake admired, grasping his nape tight to pull him into a bruising, claiming kiss that he broke off just as abruptly as it’d started, “I’m going to fuck you until you can’t walk, until you can’t talk—“

“Yes, _yes_ , please, Ma—ah!” he screamed, eyelids fluttering as Blake rammed into his prostate with almost single-minded focus, locking his knees as best he could on the couch to get Blake deeper into him.

His breathing was a chorus of lewd, loud ‘ah, ah, ah’s that had his cheeks reddening even more, the slap of Blake’s balls against his ass almost as loud, and he choked on his own breath at feeling a finger poking the sensitive skin of his rim, already stretched wide around Blake’s girth.

“Want you sloppy and wide around me,” Blake muttered in his ear, sucking Adam’s earlobe into his mouth as his hips slowed down enough to allow his finger to go in right beside his cock.

It burned, the stretch almost too much when the country singer added his middle finger too, but Adam shut his eyes and snuggled into Blake’s shoulder, telling himself he could do this one thing right.

He ended up enjoying the way the fingers swirled around Blake’s dick in him, practically gurgling in pleasure when the man began to move again, removing his fingers to slip in an out of him effortlessly, Adam’s hole tightening around him weakly as he became putty in Blake’s arms and just took what his lover gave him.

They finished almost in sync, Blake deliciously deep in him and Adam completely untouched except for the friction their own bodies had provided as soon as his lover murmured his permission.

He could feel the older man’s come dripping out of him slowly, even though he still hadn’t pulled out, and moaned as he tried to clench to keep everything in only to realized his hole was too well used to do much of anything.

“Don’t worry, baby boy,” Blake reassured him softly, lips leaving kiss after kiss on Adam’s forehead, “I’ll fill you right up in a bit, I promise.”

Adam whimpered, wishing they could just get right back at it, but fell asleep fast after sharing a few messy, sweet kisses with the country singer.

His mind was quiet, his body slack and still tingling.

It was exactly what he’d needed and more than that, too.

***

When he woke up, Blake was already pounding into him with abandon, grunting low in his throat as he pushed Adam under him and kneeled behind him on the couch to slam his hips against him.

Adam moaned over and over, rubbing his face against the cushions as he tried to present his ass better for Blake to thrust into, arms still bound and numb beneath his chest.

He’d never been literally fucked awake but he loved imagining Blake just having his way with him as he slept, waking him up just because he didn’t care about anything that wasn’t losing himself inside him.

The sound of Blake’s dick sliding in and out of him was louder now, randy and unmistakable, and he wondered if his lover found him sloppy and open enough for him.

Judging by the way Blake came with a roar, hips snapping into him for almost a minute as his cock proved it had more and more seed to fill him with, he was willing to bet he was.

“You hard, honey?” he asked, voice husky and cracking slightly. Adam nodded under the hand he felt on his neck, leaning into the thumb brushing his cheekbone, “Good, that’s very good.”

The front man didn’t need to be told what Blake wanted as the man gripped his thighs to spread his legs and angle his ass up, thumbs parting his cheeks for his tongue to start teasing his rim, pushing but not quite making it inside just yet.

It took a moment for Adam to realize Blake was literally eating him out like a girl, slurping and swallowing the come he’d put in Adam as if he wanted to make room for more.

He came with just Blake’s tongue in him right after the man dug his fingers into his skin as if prompting him to, hips pushing onto the smart mouth on him, vision going white as he squirmed and his dick produced the slightest bit of come to smear the couch with.

“Not done with you yet,” Blake promised, completely out of breath.

Adam smiled a little, looking over his shoulder to make sure his lover knew he was totally game for more. He was so spent he could hardly move, listless as Blake pulled him to his lap and secured his arms around Adam’s shoulders and the back of his knees to pick him up as he stood up and walked them both upstairs to his bedroom.

The sheets were clean but cold and he told himself that was the reason he was still shaking as the country star gently untied his arms, rubbing the tattooed skin to help circulation return to them faster, or maybe just because he wanted to.

Adam blinked, wriggled a little under the covers to get closer to Blake as the taller man settled behind his back, taking his time to kiss his shoulders and sigh against Adam’s skin, long and sated.

It was kind of weird, how affectionate he was being even though he didn’t need to, and the lead man kept waiting for the onslaught of dark feelings to unfurl inside him as they always did after a scene. Every Dom or Domme he’d ever been with had left him alone the minute they were done and he was used to weeping quietly until he felt asleep with his own arms around his body, promising himself the choking feeling of being unworthy would not be there when he woke up and that he’d do it again if it meant he was taken the way he needed to.

This was a nice change, even if only a temporary one. He made sure to show Blake how much he appreciated the attention by tilting his head to the side to nuzzle Blake’s stubble, the same one that had left a pleasant burn in the inside of his cheeks.

“You’re being so good to me, darling,” he stated, tipping down his chin to press a languid, sensual kiss to Adam’s ready mouth, “The best Sub I’ve ever had. How am I supposed to let go of you, mmh?”

“You don’t have to,” he said, very quiet and scared as he admitted more than was probably necessary, twisting to hide his face in the crook of Blake’s neck, “I don’t want you to. You’re so good to me too, Master, even though you don’t need to—“ he faltered, feeling Blake tensing against him, “It’s never been like this before.”

“Well, that’s a damn shame,” his Dom said, tone harsh at first but hands gentle on Adam’s neck as his fingertips brushed his collar, the chain still attached to it clacking a little, heavy but comforting, “Your submission is a beautiful thing and this is how it should’ve always been, darling boy.”

Adam sighed, not doubting the words but somehow still not sure he deserved to feel this treasured and cared for. People told him he was a natural at this, took him for granted and he was too used to being left to bite the dust once pleasure was had and playing was over.

Falling asleep in Blake’s arms, that was beautiful, not his neediness or how much of a cockslut he was.

***

It was Sunday when he came to again—or at least he thought it was, and that meant he’d been there most of the weekend but it was impossible to feel like he was intruding with Blake brushing wet, warm lips up the inner side of his legs.

His hands gripped Adam’s thighs firmly and he smiled, eyes glinting with pride when Adam kept the position and he could use his thumbs to open the smaller man up and slide his soft length into him slowly.

He started to get hard little by little, his weight resting soothingly on Adam’s body. He waited until Blake pecked his cheek and nuzzled his nose to close his legs around him, thinking it was probably okay, and kneaded Blake’s head through his sticky, curly hair.

Looking up, he realized the chain on his collar was tied to the headboard, as if Blake wanted to make sure Adam would stay in his bed for a little longer.

“Master,” he breathed, marveled, whimpering as Blake’s dick grew bigger and harder inside him.

“Christ, you’re so tight again,” Blake said through gritted teeth, sounding pleasantly surprised, his hands tilting Adam’s hips up to get the angle right, “I’m definitely keeping you, honey, don’t think for a second I won’t.”

He moaned, happy and more than looking forward to be the country singer’s plaything for as long he’d have him, clinging with all limbs to his lover’s body as he began to thrust into him, making sure to clench around him each time he drove in.

The chain jingled as they fucked, just long enough not to choke Adam as it kept his head slightly off the pillow, and his shouting was muffled by Blake’s hungry mouth on his as he chased his release with an intensity that had Adam’s head spinning.

He didn’t worry about his own pleasure.

He knew Blake wouldn’t leave him hanging.


	29. with food

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> continues from previous fill because i couldn't help myself, sorry.

Blake watched as his companion slept, dark and short strands of hair in disarray against the pillow, skin still endearingly pink and lips red and swollen, eyes moving behind closed lids as he dreamed, brow furrowing slightly before he cuddled closer to his side and deeper under the covers.

It was probably creepy, but he didn’t care. He had a hard time believing that this beautiful man he’d somehow lured into his bed wanted him and him alone so he liked to cherish every moment they had together in case it was the last.

He was more than a bit perturbed about finding out Adam had probably dropped and dropped hard every time after a scene until Blake took him from that club and showed him how it was really done. Poor little guy had looked so bemused and grateful with the aftercare it pulled at his heartstrings.

He let Adam rest for a while, slowly manhandled him until his head was on his lap. He roused him by brushing his brow and cheekbones gently with his fingertips after uncapping a bottle of water that he brought to his Sub’s lips as soon as he was awake enough to stare at him.

The rock star’s eyes were glassy, his breathing deep and slow, and he parted his lips to drink like Blake wanted him to, tilting his head up a little bit so he wouldn’t choke.

Blake didn’t relent until the smaller man finished the bottle, leaning down to kiss his forehead as his hands massaged Adam’s shoulders.

He smiled when the little guy moaned and pushed against his fingers that were working the knots in his muscles with ease, as if he’d done this a hundred times and knew exactly where Adam’s body kept the tension.

He loved this, how natural it came to him to know what Adam needed. He felt more than a bit stupid after years of wanting him in ways he thought his friend would never understand, only to find out by accident that they were two of a kind.

Hell would freeze over before he let Adam go, his gut told him no one else would take care of him like Blake could.  No one else would give the beautiful Sub exactly what he craved and assure he wouldn’t break under the weight of his need.

He wanted to protect Adam from everything he could until the day he died, and he knew damn well that particular feeling wasn’t part of the play between them. It was rooted in his heart, and he didn’t feel like plucking it from there even though it ached in ways he wasn’t used to, but it was an ache he liked and wanted to keep all the same.

“I got something special for us to try, baby boy,” he promised, his big hands practically engulfing Adam’s arms as he turned him over on his thigh and kept kneading the alluring, perfect planes of muscles on his back.

He felt the pop singer’s chest heaving against him, felt him shivering at the pet name and he smirked, pleased, his gaze softening when he felt Adam’s lips pressing a shy, small kiss on his skin as an answer.

Maybe this wasn’t just play, for either of them, or maybe it was and it was just wishful thinking, but sometimes Adam’s feelings for him were so plain to see he felt like the world’s biggest idiot for not giving them a chance sooner.

He tugged Adam up by the chain still secured on his collar and took him to the bathroom where they shared a shower. Not that he wasn’t enjoying the way come had dried on the soft, vulnerable skin on the inner side of his thighs or how Blake’s come still leaked slowly from his hole, but they’d have time later to get dirty all over again.

Adam shivered but stood still, letting him scrub him clean under the warm spray, hands eager to follow Blake’s lead and wash him once he handed him the sponge and turned to offer him his back where sweat had gathered so much his skin felt clammy and taut with it.

They came back to the bedroom still a bit damp, the chain leaving a wet trail on the carpet that he couldn’t care less about.

He closed Adam’s eyes with his fingers before picking him up to sprawl on the bed.

“You need a blindfold?” he asked, voice low and accent thick, index finger tipping Adam’s chin up to expose his neck and watch the pulse beating there right under the leather that signaled the younger man wanted to be his as much as Blake wanted to make him his, “No peeking, unless you want me mad at you.”

“No, Master,” his Sub replied, quiet and slightly hoarse which was no wonder after all the times Blake had made him scream, “I’ll be good.”

Satisfied with the promise, he left Adam there and took his time to gather everything he needed from the kitchen, smirking as he licked some chocolate from his fingers. It was just the right side of too hot and he couldn’t wait to cover Adam’s pretty body with it.

The rock star gasped as the chocolate dropped on his skin, legs kicking a little as his hands fisted the sheets. Blake gripped one of his ankles in a short, clear warning and Adam stopped squirming, breathing heavily as the taller man kept painting his chest and his shoulders, finishing down on his neck before pressing a strawberry that he dipped in chocolate to his lover’s parted lips.

“Eat up, darling,” he instructed, smiling when Adam took a small bite and licked his lips before reaching up for more, chewing diligently until he was done and could lick the chocolate from Blake’s fingers, strawberry juice dripping from his chin, “That’s it,” he praised, his dick twitching as Adam all but sucked his fingertips into his mouth, “That’s so nice, honey.”

The pop singer arched beneath him as Blake straddled his hips, opening his mouth obediently when he fed him another strawberry, one after the other, moaning at the taste or maybe at the feel of Blake’s length keen to be inside him again.

He ate one himself before leaning down to capture Adam’s sticky, sweet lips in a kiss that was almost all tongue and lust, his hands rubbing the chocolate on the skin he planned on licking next.

He brushed Adam’s chin with his mouth, started to lick the still warm chocolate right from his neck, tongue swirling around the collar there to reach underneath, and smiling against the skin there when Adam whined and shuddered but didn’t writhe under him just like Blake had asked him not to.

“Could eat you up all day long, sweetheart,” he murmured, his hips grinding against Adam’s twitching dick slowly, teasing them both as he kept licking him clean, hands and knees keeping him just above him, “Should chain you up right here in my bed, keep you right where you belong.”

“Yes, _yes_ ,” Adam agreed, his voice broken almost like a plea, “I want—I want to be yours, Master, I—“

He groaned, loud and incredibly aroused at that, and couldn’t quite stop himself from biting down the crook of his Sub’s neck, sucking the skin to make sure a big love bite would stay to mark him as his for days, weeks if he could have that much, messing up the slow, sensual rhythm he wanted for this moment as he licked the chocolate off of the tattoos on Adam’s chest hurriedly, his hands already gripping his thighs to spread them and present Adam’s crack to slide his dick in it.

“Open your eyes,” he ordered, feeling like the words were punched out of him, straightening up to stare down at the pretty thing beneath him.

His lover blinked dazed, teary eyes up at him, panting as he felt Blake using him to get off. He was so hard he was leaking enough for the sound to be heard, hot and taunting him to move faster but he took a deep breath and resisted, choosing to kiss Adam again, his mouth demanding and frantic as it glided and sucked Adam’s.

He sat back on his haunches, enjoying the needy sound he pulled from Adam’s throat at moving away from him. He reached for another strawberry, eating it around a leer as he watched his Sub lying still and waiting for him to take him.

“Say it again,” he rasped.

“I—want to be yours,” the smaller man whispered, legs still parted to let Blake see everything he had to give him, “Want to stay here and be yours, Master.”

He had to close his eyes and breathe deep, reaching down to close a hand on his dick to stop himself from coming just from hearing his lover offering himself up like that.

He sat down on the mattress, crossing his legs and patting his thighs for Adam to climb to his lap, which he rushed to do like he was just as desperate to be joined with him as Blake was.

He guided Adam’s hands to his shoulders and canted his hips so that his dick would be up and ready for the pop rocker to ride.

He knew Adam had to be sore already so he reached for the bedside table and poured some lube on his hand, coating himself with it as his lover trembled and lowered himself down slowly, trying to pull him in just using his hips, his head lolling on Blake’s shoulder, frustrated little mewls muttered against his skin when he kept missing the mark and Blake’s cock bounced off of him instead of going in.

He caressed Adam’s head with a hand, his other one covering one of his hipbones as he waited for him to remember, to focus on how and where the country singer had already taken him over and over.

It didn’t take long for his little lover to figure it out, angling his hips just right as the head of Blake’s cock breached him.

He made sure none of them had time to recover, slamming into Adam’s inviting heat right away. The rock star shouted, arching off of him, nails digging into his shoulders as Blake gripped his ass and spread his cheeks like he thought he could get even deeper inside.

He bounced up and down his lap with the same kind of urgency Blake was using to fuck him open with. It’d been hours since they had done this and Adam was surprisingly tight again, clenching down around him like he never wanted the taller man to pull out of him.

He rolled them off the bed after a few minutes of mindless fucking, groaning in relief when the floor proved to be better to keep Adam’s ass flushed against him as he pounded into him.

He let his knees skid open until his chest was plastered to Adam’s and he could take his lips again in a searing kiss that got sloppy as Adam tightened around him, his limbs as greedy as the smooth walls Blake was sliding in and out of.

He yanked on the chain to let his Sub know he could come and Adam screamed prettily as he finished between them, stuttering lewd moans as Blake spilled into him and made no move to stop smothering him with his weight, his hips still rocking a little as Blake’s sight remained white around the edges.

He burrowed into Adam’s shoulder, peppering him with small awed kisses as he realized things just kept getting better and better every time they were together.

Adam snuggled into his front, sighing happily when Blake somehow managed to haul them both to bed without pulling out from where he was snug and warm inside his lover.

There were still some strawberries on the tray he’d left on the bedside table so he took one and watched Adam chewing it tiredly, kissing the juice from his mouth and chin deliberately as his lover fell asleep while struggling not to, eyelids falling closed and then opening with a start until he just couldn’t fight it and settled for another nap on Blake’s chest.

He smiled, sated and happier than he could ever remember being, and slept knowing he’d wake up and have Adam right where he wanted and needed him to be.


	30. whatever pleases you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm gonna miss writing sex just for the sake of it, i think. 
> 
> there are so many kinks in this i should probably apologize.

He kissed Adam briefly, almost trembling with the need to drive into him as he leaned over his body, the smaller man’s thighs open wide to let him into that sweet hole he loved so much.

He groaned in approval at feeling the pop singer’s fingers all but guiding him in, making sure he’d slip right in with a wet noise that he loved almost as much as the tight, hot and smooth heat around his cock.

“Fuck, Adam,” he breathed out, starting them on a shallow but almost fast rhythm, eyes rolling back in his head with even that little at how amazing it felt already.

His little lover laughed, pleased and breathy, hooking his ankles on Blake’s thighs to bring him closer, deeper, keening when Blake moved his hips just right and gave a little jiggle as he reached that private place that turned Adam into an incoherent mess.

They were tangled together on Adam’s couch, foreheads touching, their birthday suits their favorite choices to seek pleasure with, warm and sweaty skin gliding and rubbing as they stole kisses from each other after almost a whole hour of just teasing and making out.

Adam moved with him, bendy and wanton and so fucking beautiful Blake wanted to keep him like this forever, and he had to let go of the back of the couch to grab the lead man’s neck instead, thumbs caressing smooth cheeks lovingly as he gave his straining muscles a break and just undulated his hips in place instead of pulling out until only the head of his dick was snug inside his lover.

“What?” he asked, a playful grin fighting to take residence on his face instead of the pinched expression of pleasure he had, hazel eyes wide and surprisingly warm as he looked up at Blake.

Instead of answering a potentially dangerous question, he arched his back and put as much of his weight as he could into the next thrust, sighing with joy and biting his lower lip against a loud groan when Adam screamed and scrambled to hold on to his back with an arm, squeezing deliciously around him as he jerked himself off frantically.

He was always eager to come first since he knew Blake could—and would—fuck him into another longer, better orgasm soon enough if he did.

“Blake, Blake,” he chanted, head falling back at the same time his right leg spread impossibly wider, almost resting on the arm of the couch, “I’m gonna—“

“Got you, darling,” he drawled, licking a salty path right over Adam’s ear and moaning practically at the same time Adam did, feeling those tight walls close around him just right.

He loved hearing Adam coming, the sound doubling the heat already coiling deep in his gut. He always sounded so surprised, so delighted and loud and high-pitched it never failed to send a rush of pleasure right up his spine, making his hips speed up and his vision blur with the force of it.

“Keep going, _oh_ , _oh_ , please,” the little guy panted, limp and flushed underneath him as Blake all but used him to get off, “You feel so good, baby.”

He was already twitching, always a junkie for more of Blake’s dick, lashes fluttering prettily against his cheekbones with the harsh end of Blake’s thrusts as he tried to stare up at him without blinking but failed miserably at being overstimulated right in the spot where he was the weakest.

“Wish I could fill you up,” he found himself confessing, his back going a little rigid at his slip but his mouth didn’t seem to give a damn about Blake’s inner panic, “Fill you right up until you’re leaking—“

Adam’s jaw, already slack and open, fell a little more as his breath hitched and he stared at Blake in shock.

He stopped, hating himself for feeling so at ease with Adam he’d just talked too much.

He was… well, sometimes just too kinky for his own good, always found himself wanting more and more out of his partners.

“I—“ Adam stuttered, shy and small despite of how long they’ve been doing this, “I’d like that, yeah.”

He was sure he’d heard wrong up until those skilled, long fingers were pulling him out and sliding the condom off of him quickly, fingertips eager but gentle at leading him right back to his entrance.

Blake couldn’t help the loud, outright pornographic groan that pushed out of his throat. It felt so fucking different and better already, so much hotter and smoother and closer it was all he could do to grip himself in hand and shut his eyes tight not to come just like that.

Adam seemed to agree with him, body trembling and feet slipping off of Blake’s thighs, hands tightening on Blake’s back as much as his hole was around his cock.

It was all he could do to start moving again slowly, like both of them would explode into a million pieces if he wasn’t careful enough.

They kissed hungrily, urgently, the sound of their lips smacking together almost as loud as the wet in and out of Blake’s cock inside of those velvety walls he thought he knew so well but felt so brand new and intoxicating at that moment there was just no way he’d last long.

The rock star arched as he spilled deep inside of him, whimpering when he hurried to pull out and watch how his own seed trickled out, gut clenching as if it was possible for him to come again just staring at Adam’s legs spreading more for him to enjoy the show and his slender chest heaved as if he’d just run a marathon.

Adam was still hard and that just wouldn’t do but he had an idea.

He licked his lips and slid off the couch to kneel right in front of his prize, circling Adam’s entrance with the tip of his tongue before pushing it in. It was as heady and stimulating as he’d always imagined it’d be and even though it was his first time doing it he licked and slurped with enthusiasm, hoping it’d be at least half as good for his little lover as it was for him, a hand already pushing his dick out of the foreskin even though it made him hiss in oversensitivity and the other gripping the soft, inner side of Adam’s left thigh tight.

“Fucking hell, oh Blake, _fuck_ ,” Adam panted, canting his hips for him to reach deeper, “That’s so nasty, oh God—ah!“

He chuckled, the vibration ripping a startled cry out of the lead man, and nosed closer into the valley between Adam’s pert cheeks.

He groaned, lick-licking inside as he jerked himself off swiftly, squeezing his cock until it hurt as he looked up and saw the exact moment in which Adam lost it and gushed all over his belly.

He smirked, laughing loudly when he straightened enough to chase his pretty lover’s lips with his own only for him to scrunch his nose and avoid the kiss even as his arms embraced him, welcoming and loving and so sated Blake almost, almost thought he’d be okay that night.

***

They shared a sleepy, quick shower before going to bed and by all means, Blake should be exhausted and snoring away right along with the little guy between his arms but his brain—his dick, mostly, the greedy bastard—was stuck in a loop, wondering if Adam was still loose down there and if he was just how easy it’d be for Blake to slide in and fuck him into the mattress as he lied plaint and unaware beneath him.

He was hard as a rock just thinking about it, his cock twitching and smearing pre-come over Adam’s soft, warm cheeks.

He started rocking his hips so he could get some friction against his crack absentmindedly, only noticing his slip when Adam sighed and pushed back against him.

He swallowed thickly, telling himself he would _not do this_ without waking Adam first but letting his fingers find and press into Adam’s hole, grunting low in his throat because fuck if it wasn’t as loose as he’d imagined and he _wanted_ , craved this so much he didn’t know what to do.

“Adam,” he croaked with some effort, “Adam, honey, wake up.”

He nuzzled Adam’s shoulder, all but pushing him into consciousness, and Adam stirred with a yawn, peeking behind to squint at him.

“Wha—“ he moaned, trembling from head to toe as Blake thrust right into him without as much as a warning first, moaning himself when he confirmed it was the easiest, hottest slide yet between them, his lover still slick and open from earlier.

“Need you so much,” he confessed, hoarse and more than a bit scared, his hips picking up as Adam lifted a leg to encourage him deeper, “Hell, sweetheart, I’d fuck you right through the night if you let me.”

He made sure to pump the pop rocker quick and dirty so he’d be just as desperate for this as Blake was.

Adam howled, hiding his face against the pillow, body clamping around Blake’s cock enough to let him know he kind of liked the idea, practically biting the sheets when the bigger man grabbed his hips and pulled him back as he drove forward, the muffled scream more than enough to announce he’d just find his prostate.

“Yes, _yes_ , anything you want,” his lover babbled, taking the hand he was using to fondle him with in his and making him fist his hand even tighter around him.

He stopped, breath caught between hope and wonder. Adam couldn’t possibly know what he was agreeing to, what Blake would do to him if he as much as hinted he’d be okay with it.

He moved his hand from Adam’s hip to his neck, arching it back until his head was leaning on his shoulder to whisper right in his ear, “Careful, rock star, or I’m gonna think you meant that.”

Adam all but sobbed at the loss of movement, pushing his sweet little ass right against his groin as much as he could to taunt him back into action.

“Shit, just—“ he moaned, the tip of Blake’s dick somehow brushing where he needed without his say so, “Do it, I don’t even _care_ , just _fuck me_ , _dickhead_ —“

Blake did, tossing Adam down onto his belly to keep snapping his hips, his knees skidding on the sheets as his hands pressed into the small of Adam’s back to keep him there and just make him take it, his beautiful partner keening and clenching around him just like he needed, legs bracketing his own and feet hooking on his shins.

He still thought the little guy didn’t actually mean anything by it, that they were just words spilled in the heat of the moment, but after cleaning them up and snuggling into his chest, Adam said, very clearly, “No one’s made me feel this good, so yeah, here’s your green card to do whatever you want to me, Big Country,” and tipped his chin up to seal it with a kiss.

It was a good thing he was way too spent to do anything so freaking soon, because fuck, he just knew he would’ve done something he’d regret later.

***

They were busy for a few days after that intense night, but not enough for Blake to forget Adam’s offering, his _promise_ , so the first time they got time for each other again he all but carried the little guy to bed over his shoulder.

“You’re so fucking horny, I can’t believe you,” Adam laughed, helping him to undress them, good-natured and husky enough not to let Blake take offense in that.

He grinned, unzipping his jeans and feeling like the king of the world when those pretty eyes zeroed in on his half-hard cock, “Oh,” he feigned confusion, “So you don’t want this? Shame.”

The pop singer whined, high and shameless, and crawled on the mattress until he was peppering Blake’s dick with small, eager kisses and letting Blake push it into his mouth with a sure hand, sucking the head like a pro, looking up as if daring the older man to doubt for even a second that he didn’t want it.

“You look so pretty with my cock in you,” he admired, palming Adam’s nape to keep him in place as he thrust deeper into his throat.

He felt Adam shivering at his words, gritted his teeth against the onslaught of pleasure as his lover’s eyes fluttered shut and he sucked for all he was worth, forcing Blake to fuck his face in earnest, almost forgetting his plans for the night.

It was the rock start who helped him to get back on track, pushing him off of him as he wheezed, flushed and sweaty and so debauched already Blake twitched just looking at him.

“I thought you wanted to come in here?” he asked, almost innocently if it weren’t for how fucking wrecked he sounded, a cocky eyebrow raised as he turned to present his gorgeous ass to Blake, “’It’s kinda nice, y’know, feeling you doing it.”

“Gosh, Adam,” he had to fumble for the lube, caressing Adam’s rim with practiced ease for him to open up and take the first finger in, “How did I get so fucking lucky?”

“Mmm, dunno,” Adam taunted him, twisting to look back at him, jaw going slack when Blake didn’t wait a minute and just breached him with a second finger, “Always knew you’d be great at this, big hands, longs legs, you had to have a nice dick to sit on.”

He smiled, pleased and flattered, leaning down to kiss the small of Adam’s back.

“That so, huh,” he said, fucking Adam with his fingers until he began to chase them back, only then adding a third finger, “Should’ve fucked you in my lap that first day, then, showed you who you belonged to right from the start.”

Adam moaned brokenly, arms giving way so his face landed flat on the pillow beneath him, hips rocking in sync with Blake’s hand as his cock jutted between his legs, hard and leaking just like Blake’s.

He wasted no time in hauling the lithe body to his lap and fulfilling that little fantasy of theirs right away, soothing Adam by sucking kisses to his neck when he tried to pull away at the suddenness of it.

He touched the place where they were joined with awed fingertips, felt Adam’s rim stretched wide around him, struggling to keep him in instead of pushing him out as the younger man gasped and thrashed between his arms, obviously overwhelmed.

He chose a mild pace, giving Adam time to get used to him, only gaining momentum and speed once he was snug inside and he felt his lover’s back relaxing against his chest again, a content little sound rushing past his lips when his body stopped resisting and he sneaked a hand between his legs to jerk himself off quickly, the sound lewd and perfect in the air around them.

“That’s it, darling,” he whispered in Adam’s ear, taking the lobe into his mouth as he seized the slim hips tighter and focused in slamming deep and hard into him, “Make yourself come for me.”

“ _Bla_ -ke—“ Adam whimpered, clamping around him tight enough to make him groan, loud and appreciative, spurting in his hand and going lax in Blake’s lap after his hips went a little wild as he rode his climax, “So good.”

“Uh-huh,” he agreed, slowing down a bit to give the pop singer time to catch up with him and get the high of another orgasm along with him this time.

He knew that the longer he fucked Adam, the better. He’d be loose and slick and ready for Blake to take him in any way he wanted without any prep and that, fuck—that was enough to spur him on with little else.

Adam started bouncing in his lap again after long minutes and Blake took it as the sign it was to thrust into him faster to bring them both off, biting down on Adam’s shoulder to muffle the shout that wanted out of him at knowing he’d have him just like he’d always wanted in a little while.

His lover screamed enough for the two of them at feeling the teeth digging into his skin, scratching Blake’s arms roughly as the man fucked him right into and through the edge.

Neither of them cared about curling up on their sides over the wet spot, falling asleep almost instantly with Blake nestled between Adam’s cheeks, soft and satiated for the moment.

***

He woke up to Adam’s bedroom bathed in darkness, the distant lights from outside taking a while to help Blake see anything in the dead of night.

He kissed his lover’s upper back as he moved them carefully not to wake him, smiling when Adam sighed and settled easily in the new position on his stomach.

He had to bite back a groan as his fingers slid right into him with a squelchy noise. He flailed for the lamp on the bedside table, eager to see how open Adam still was.

Feeling brave, he twisted his wrist, pressing his fingers to where he knew that special bundle of nerves was inside.

Adam only breathed deeply and squirmed at first but he didn’t disappoint, moaning lowly in his sleep soon enough, hips rutting against the mattress when Blake didn’t relent and pumped his fingers in and out of him in exactly the right way.

It was easy to use his knees to part Adam’s thighs in between short rounds of him using his fingers to tease him and jerking himself off roughly at hearing Adam’s tiny, whiny complaints every time he stopped and left him hard and still incredibly, deliciously oblivious of what was happening.

He withdrew his hand once he was certain Adam was completely asleep, guiding his lover’s legs to line his own as the tip of his cock breached him, biting his lip when he just went right in, that well-used hole swallowing him up with no trouble as Adam breathed into the pillow and barely reacted at the intrusion.

He gripped the rock star’s hips loosely, slipping into him steadily but carefully, pausing whenever Adam made a noise in the back of his throat and almost lifted his head to catch Blake fucking him while he was practically unconscious.

The fear of how sick this was came back to him with a vengeance, the possibility of Adam dumping his pervert ass for this very much real but not really enough to make him stop after all the years he’d wanted to do something like this.

Adam started to make this soft, pleased, breathy sounds that went straight to his dick after a while, fisting the pillow at both sides of his head as he canted his hips up for Blake to drive into him easier, his body practically trained at taking him in.

Once Blake found his prostate again, he was too far gone to care about Adam waking up in the middle of it. He kept fucking into him, unrepentant and wild, grunting as he picked up the pace and Adam woke up with a long, shocked moan, back arching as Blake’s balls slapped against his hips and they both came in a mess of groans and sweaty limbs.

“You—“ Adam panted, tilting his head to look back at him, a frown battling with his mouth still parted in a big ‘O’ after what they’d done.

Blake gulped, didn’t pull out just yet, and just waited with his heart jackhammering in his throat.

“Fuck, Blake,” Adam buried his face in the pillow, sagging under him but turning his head to stare up at him with a small, naughty grin, “That was so _hot_. Who knew you had it in you?”

He all but beamed in relief, covering his amazing lover with his body so they could share a messy, open-mouthed, hot kiss.

“You’re not mad?” he checked, just in case.

“You can fuck me awake anytime,” Adam assured him, soft and amused and trusting, “You sick motherfucker.”

“That makes two of us,” he pointed out, nuzzling into his lover’s nape before lapping the bite mark he’d left earlier, rearranging them on their sides slowly so they’d be comfortable.

“Mm-mmm,” his little lover mumbled sleepily, approving, and fell right back asleep before Blake could even pull out.

He closed his eyes, feeling more relaxed and happy than he’d ever been, vowing he’d have the best breakfast waiting for Adam in the morning and that he’d smuggle all his favorite snacks to the set.


End file.
